“Well that doesn’t feel natural” #twss

To get to my new job selling Tour Bus tours to the Tourists I have to take 2 Subway lines to get to Times Square. The office is on 7th Avenue so I have to exit the subway at Seventh avenue & W40th or walk through the throngs of tourists in Times Square. There are roughly 15 different subway entrances/exits for Times Square because that sucker is a vast maze of tunnels and steps. I have been making this trip now 9 times and still haven’t gotten it right. One trip last Friday when it was Africa hot I ended up at 8th & 42nd so you can understand my frustration and need for Gold Bond. On this day we had one of those annoying cold NYC rains so I wanted to get this right.

Well I nailed it, turned at the right post, took the correct stairwell by the elevator and exited at 40th & Seventh. I was pumped! I exit the subway and make the 1 block trip to the office and let me tell you folks things were going good for Carbunkle Trumpet. Then it went to shit……I am walking along and feel something unnatural on my right foot like I was dragging toilet paper so I glance down. My freshly repaired $150.00 Bostonian lace ups had a blow out from the sole to the shoe. I keep walking along and naturally it falls off, so I throw the sole in the trash and limp into the office. After some select curse words I find a shoe store a couple blocks South of the office and limp there now, with a wet sock.

Guess that will teach me to claim a victory against the NY Subway system.

  “Hey Gloria, I need to be late to my 10AM meeting. Also can you direct me to the nearest Men’s dress shoe store?”

 Closest store that was open at 9AM was Sketchers. I was desperate as my sock was literally poking through the bottom of the shoe.

 Not my first choice but I got them and thank God they have good arch support for my walking. The sales rep did laugh when I told her I didn’t need the box and could she dispose of my old shoes.

I hope you had a good laugh and thank goodness I didn’t have a fart that failed me!

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