Coleman Towner on First Avenue in the Upper East Side of Manhattan
Paul (Doorman and lifelong New York Mets Fan) – “So where you going Carbunkle and Mrs. Carbunkle?
CBT – “We are going to watch the World Series Paul.” *rolling a carry-on bag behind him
Paul – “Why the luggage and why are you leaving so early to go watch the World Series? The Game doesn’t start till 8PM.”
CBT – “Why Paul, we aren’t heading to Baker Street or Iggy’s Sports Bar, we are flying to Chicago this morning. I have waited for this day since 1984. I can’t not be there if the Cubs Win this thing.”
Paul – “Win it all! You know what they say that the best thing that came out of Cleveland was I-90!”
And with that our asses are heading to Chicago for Games 4 & 5 of the World Series. Now, cool your jets, we don’t have tickets (yet) we just have to be there. But before I get ahead of myself let me back up and give a proper back story.
Back when I was growing up on the mean streets of East Memphis I had to stay home during the summers. It was hell, I tell you. I had NO remote, my cable box was one of those slide things. *editor’s note – the dirty channels were on the far right* and during the day you had two choices for sports during the day. Turner Sports Network, you got to watch the Atlanta Braves or with WGN you had the Chicago Cubs. For some reason, I found myself watching the Cubs because (please understand I was 13 at the time) I loved watching and listening to some guys named Harry Carey and his sidekick Steve Stone.
For those who don’t know what I am talking about.
In 1984 I got my first chance to see Wrigley Field. They really should put holy water stoups by the gates when you walk into Wrigley. Yes, I am now typing in shorter sentences. I want you to understand something very serious. That is when you walk into Wrigley it really is a religious experience. I was 14 years old and really didn’t understand the game but during the 7th inning stretch it happened. Harry Carrey came out of his booth and leaned over and sang “Take me out to the Ball game.” I recall thinking in my pubescent mind, other than I could almost see that woman’s boob a row in front of me, was that I have to follow these bastards. I respect that over half of my readers weren’t born in 1984 but it’s cool. I am 46 years old and tomorrow we are heading to Chicago to see a religious experience.
Hey Hey! Let me Hear You! A One, a Two, a Three….Take Me out to the Ballgame….
Now let’s talk about the lovable losers (I hate that term btw) that are Cubs fans. Ever since the invention of Social Media all Cubs fans can relate to each other. All it takes is a tweet, comment on Facebook, Instagram post that Cubs fans can say “hey, I never met them but they are ok, they love the Cubs. If I tried right now to list all of the Cubs fans that I have met on Social Media but not in real life…. that list would be large. Hell, I sold my effin Jeep to a guy that he and his wife named their first child Theo! By the way, they also will be in Chicago this weekend but have to leave before game 4 has its first pitch.
Ok, enough words. To the Cub Haters that I have known for many, many years – Next Year is here! It’s time to hoist a banner!
Shout out to Baby Fine Hair, She sent this to me and I do appreciate it but I can’t wait to burn this fucker on First Ave after the Cubs win the World Series
But should the Cubs win out on Sunday, please don’t judge me if you see tears streaming down my face…. They won one for Harry, and Ernie, and Don, and many, many more. #FlytheW
Shout out to all you Cardinal Fans, let me know where I can watch your team in October…Oh wait….yeah that’s awkward! Can you tell me all about your pennants again. Please I live in New York I could ask the same to the Yankee Fans…
“Have I heard about the Goat?” The Goat Story. Fuck the Goat. I can go up 3 subway stops and have Goat in a Pita. We got this! John Adams, you got me! I can’t wait to hug your face when we got this!
Disclaimer – I didn’t know that Bill Murray, John Cusack and Vince Vaughn and others would bandstand on my glory. It’s ok boys we shall hoist a drink on Sunday.
Harry – “Way Back, It could, It would, It may….”
Steve Stone – “Pop out to Grace *first baseman* Hey Harry, have you had any cold Budweiser’s today?”
Harry – “Hey Hey!”
Boys Bathroom inside the bowels of Wrigley. Who hasn’t released the Kracken?
Lets Go Cubs, Let’s Go!