Month: April 2017

What the? A Bonus Post? You working from Home CBT?

Nope, I was able to secure some time on the laptop last night. You see between Momma’s skooling the Commodore 64 computer is pretty much always in use. Last night as I was watching Playoff Hockey at the Cigar Inn I might add I was able to bang out a couple posts since I have been slacking.

IMG_0677UWS Holly – Can you explain why I ‘had’ to have a picture of your food? Doesn’t matter, oh and our waitress from Friday night at that joint in the LES is the hostess at Fig & Olive in Midtown. She called me out on today at lunch.

IMG_0678Took EGP to see the Fearless Girl.

IMG_0679I am taking that when we got to our fancy dinner this Christmas.

IMG_0685No Smartasses, this isn’t a stock photo. I took it when EGP and I went to Easter Mass.

IMG_0683This is one of the reasons I needed to visit St. Patrick’s on Easter Sunday.

IMG_0682Why can’t we have nice things? I don’t need much space in this sucker.

Have a good weekend.


Loser Lounge Tribute to George Michael

It has literally taken me a full week to finally formalize words to describe what I saw this past Friday. We have seen many a good losers lounge tribute. The Elton John Tribute back in the late 90’s was right up there with the best show seen. That was until this past Good Friday.

From Anna Copa Cabanna starting the set on a patrons table singing “Wake me up before you Go-Go” to Kalia Floreska’s version of “Careless Whisper” it was a helluva show. Naturally “Freedom 90” with the entire cast dancing with the audience was fun then there was “I want your sex”. Let me jus say that it is good to know that EGP is one of us because when dude threw down his velvet coat and revealed the banana hammock and assless chaps…..I am glad to know I won’t be the reason that EGP needs therapy when she gets into her mid 30’s.

Probably the funniest/off color song was Julian Maile’s “Heal the Pain” where he gave the great line “So Jesus died today but he will be back in 3 days. Pretty much anything goes!” Oh come on, you laughed at that. I know you did.  I am going to stop right there because I hear thunder in the distance.

IMG_0658I have seen some interesting Tie Bars before but this one looks a little restricting.

IMG_0659Danya Dantzler belting out “I knew you were waiting”

IMG_0660 - CopyAnyone wearing an 18″ cross around your neck on Good Friday has to know how to party right?

IMG_0663You know they have to have “Careless Whisper” the iconic saxophone George Michael Song.

IMG_0665Freedom 90 Dance Party Song!

IMG_0666The Losers Lounge Back Up dancers

IMG_0670CiCi James singing “Everything She Wants”

IMG_0672EGP Selfie shot

IMG_0673Brother Brooks, why don’t you say hello? I am 10 feet from you.

Have a good weekend. It is RoboPalooza this weekend as Momma is out of Town!


Spring has sprung in NYC

Happy Easter Spud! No I am not going to divulge the meaning or circumstances of that statement on this blog. No doubt that Mr. Flowered Man Bag is cleaning off of his laptop because he spewed coffee all over it. Another time folks.  We have officially kicked Old Man Winter to the curb here in Manhattan. Goodbye Puffy Coat, hello Blue and White Seersucker suit and white bucks.

For those of you Memphians who have already reapplied Gold Bond a dozen times and or had the boys from Conway Services work on your air conditioner allow me to bring you up to speed. Here in New York we don’t really say that it is spring until it is after Easter and they take down the ice skating rink in Rockefeller Plaza. This past Sunday was Easter if you didn’t see the dozen “He has Risen” (I thought everybody was making soufflés for Easter Dinner) posts on Facebook and today they melt the ice in the plaza to make way for alfresco dining.

What does that mean to this former Memphian who is considering becoming a fan of the Brooklyn Nets because they already have low expectations you ask? This means that we dodged another Winter Death Bullet that the Northeast typically gets. I recall 3 years back when I was drinking Ice Cold Bud Light Iced Tea at BBQ Fest with the Asian Fireman and he was telling me about the 25+ days of below freezing weather they had that winter. I mean, I bitch when it is 40 and the wind is blowing. Can you imagine me when it is below freezing for more than 3 days? One of the docs that I smoke cigars sums it up perfectly with when he told us why he takes so many vacations in the winter. “I have everything I need up here; I have a Penthouse apartment in the city, I have a summer house on the shore but the weather up here is lousy. That is why I shag ass below the 16th latitude.” By the way, we made Doc pay for our cigars that day……what an asshole.

So to my fellow Memphians, enjoy spring and the spring festivals. To my Belizean buddies, enjoy some quiet time after the Easter parties and get read for Lobster fest. And to you Nova and KLC Man, enjoy that frozen snow till July 4th when you have 2 weeks of your summer!

IMG_0691Couples Skate is over kids!

IMG_0685No I didn’t steal this from LZ, I went to mass on Easter Sunday with EGP. If you don’t believe me ask her.

IMG_0653Good Friday I stepped up my Game with a bowtie. I think I may shake some shit up here this summer. First I need a Brooks Brothers Boating Straw hat.

IMG_0692Maya was very happy when I told her that there wouldn’t be anymore winter and she would have to scrape ass over the snow.

FullSizeRenderBB (Baltimore Bjorksu) told me that she was disappointed that her new city didn’t embrace pastels on Easter. I told her that next year she should bring her butt up here. New York makes a spectacle out of everything. Behold the Easter Bonnet Parade up 5th Ave. *photo borrowed from ahealthysliceofpai*

I may be ok with Gold Bond Usage till mid May folks. In other words, don’t buy long on the Gold Bond Stock.

Have you ever seen a grown man sing “I want your sex” wearing Ass Less Chaps and a banana hammock on Good Friday?

Oh did I get your attention with that blog post? Well yes, it did happen to me this past Friday. Sorry folks but I don’t have enough time to really tell you about this. I am kinda bizzy but I wanted to make sure that I made a post on Easter Monday.

Oh and yes here are the pictures for you sick bastards.

IMG_0686Thanks to UWS H for the pics. I am sure she spit her drink out when I asked her last night for these pictures.

IMG_0688Soak it in there folks, soak it in. I have tried to drink enough Vodka this weekend to get this image out of my head and it hasn’t work.

Shout out to SBM on her first day of school in Baltimore. You got this!



Sunday – Funday at Coney Island

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know that this post is late. Do you know how hard it is to come up with Holy Week Lenten Jokes each day?  Last Sunday we decided to head on the Q to Coney Island since the boardwalk was officially open and because we had a fun time on our last Trip. We reached out to our favorite Russian who lives in the UES and we met her at the E72nd subway stop. The ride to the end of the line was exactly 1 hour. Stop laughing Maria and some of you New Yorkers, you are going to be jealous when you finish this entry.

We arrived at the boardwalk and promptly headed over to Nathans for some meat in tube form. Let me just say that I hope that Nathans was having some first week jitters because service was to say “a little slow”. Mrs. Trumpet had a corndog while I enjoyed 2 hot dogs with Mustard and Relish. Oh and the Bacon Cheese Fries are pretty damn good too. You read that Zsquared? They have M’effin Bacon Cheese Fries! After lunch The Russian mentioned that we should “walk of our wieners” so we checked out the rides and games on the boardwalk. No we didn’t ride the Wonder Wheel or the Cyclone this time but it is on the short list for next trip. We found a nice spot at Ruby’s on the boardwalk and enjoyed watching the patrons walking the boardwalk, got some sun and a buzz.

Later we found another establishment that is right up some of our Dive Beer fans called Red Doors Bar and Grill. $3 Bud Lights in a can and they were ice cold. Knock it off KLC, they had fancy beers there too. After a good afternoon of people watching we headed home with some Train Beers and ordered pizza for dinner. AKA – It was a good Sunday Funday!

IMG_0621I texted this picture over to A-Cups just to let her know that we were at Meat in Tube Form Nirvana!

IMG_0622Bacon Cheese Fries! I have a feeling that this will be a staple item when I visit Coney Island next trip.

IMG_0623They have a game called “Pigs in a blanket”

IMG_0624There it is folks, the Wonder Wheel!

IMG_0626Inside of the Red Doors Bar and Grill

IMG_0628Dmitry – Can we get another beer? I know that you are busy sitting there!

IMG_0630It was windy and cold as you know what waiting for our return train

@Brizzyc you in for the Mermaid Festival? I hear that it is a must see!



Pictures of the “Last” Week

Sorry for the last of posts this past week. I had a sinus infection, the anniversary of my circling the sun happened, it was a bad week of selling tour bus tickets and momma used the computer all last weekend. Anyway I am behind the 8ball once again. So without further adieu here are some pics I had on my iFoam

IMG_0595I am so glad that baseball season is now here. That means that Hockey Season is over right? #LetsgoRangers

IMG_0596A Cups posted this picture on Insta. I am not going to lie, it moved when I saw the cheese bath for burger dipping. She is my spirit animal afterall!

IMG_0599Hey D&P, I have a client lunch this week and guess where I am taking them!

IMG_0608We were dropping off The-Soon-To-Be Mrs. P and I snapped a pic of this.

IMG_0609We may or may not have been sitting here some 20 minutes before taking the pic of Grand Central.

IMG_0591Still can’t believe that this silly bastard isn’t here to take me to the Track now that I live up here. This is probably a good thing.

C85FWEeUwAAaJdHThat’s ok, I know that she is up there right now busting McNick’s balls on a daily basis. Happy Birthday Otis, we miss you.

IMG_0619Sure go ahead and crack open a 2X4 Bud Heavy. Oh wait that is your 3rd while sitting here. You wouldn’t happen to know (INSERT NAME HERE) would you?

IMG_0582I bet that Mrs. Trumpets boss’ 5 year old daughter Emanuel has forgotten that she invited me to Passover Dinner. Believe it or not I really want to go. The closest Jewish person I knew in Memphis was my Pediatrician.

Have a good Holy Week and Passover!

If you need Spices, Seasonings, Herbs, Salts, and Goo then visit Kalustyan’s Market on Lex

A while back I was with one of my cohorts selling tour bus tickets to the tourists. He is a native New Yorker and were discussing the difference between Southern and Northern food. He told me that some New Yorkers think that Southern food can be too spicy and even went so far to tell me that even some New Yorkers think that Ketchup is too spicy. (If you hail from south of the Mason Dixson line and are reading this and wondering if I am fucking with you, I promise that I am not!) He told me that he was getting into hot sauces and found a great one from Belize called Marie Sharp. My ears perked up saying that I was familiar with this brand and asked where he picked some up here in Manhattan. He gave me the address of a place on Lex at E28th Street in the Indian section of Murray Hill.

This past weekend I ventured out in the rain and cold to acquire some Marie Sharp since the bottle we got on our last trip to Belize ran out. Ironic that it was almost one year to the date but needless to say I had to get some more hot sauce. I find Kalustyan’s on Lexington and make my way into this sprawling joint. This place is probably 3 storefronts because you walk into different rooms with shelves of all kinds of different spices, seasonings, marinades, and stuff I have no idea what is in a bottle. I find the Hot Sauce section and pick up my Marie Sharp and was amazed that everything was well before the expiration date. This is a common problem I find when someone has a huge variety of Hot Sauce because they can’t get good rotation on everything.

I am standing there and one of the managers comes up to me and we start talking about the store. She tells me that they do more spice and seasoning business for restaurants here in Manhattan than anyone. They get daily shipments in from different purveyors to make sure what they have on the shelf is fresh and listen to their customers. We started talking about the Marie Sharps and she told me that it is one of their better sellers for Latin American restaurants and for Belizeans living in New York. I explain to her my history with the country and how I am always trying different things. She recommends their Spice and Herb book and shows me a couple tricks that you can do in the kitchen to create different flavors. I agree and pay cash for everything. Typical New York Establishment, you can use a card but Cash is King and you get better discounts.

IMG_0580Some of these hot sauces were pretty funny. I stuck with what I knew. Marie Sharps

IMG_0581Need Pink Salt in Bulk? The square on the right is 16X16

IMG_0583Yep, I made some Eggs the next morning and lit it up!

That was it for pictures as they Manager told me that they prefer that people don’t take pictures. I respect that but I will be back!