Month: December 2017

2017 in Review – What did What?

Thanks to Jensized on a great post. Do yourself a favor and go over and check out what she accomplished in 2017. Talk about an overachiever! I mean the little shit ran 3 half marathons. Hell my old ass got tired watching the one outside my apartment and I was drinking beer and smoking a cigar! No in all seriousness great job Jen on your accomplishments. You got me beat in that I could cook pretty much anything under the sun except my pancakes making skills stink.

Anyway with out further fanfare here is Carbunkle Trumpet’s List of stuff that I, we or as a group did in 2017 in no particular order.

  1. Rode the pretty new shiny Q on Years Day from the Upper East Side to Coney Island to watch the Coney Island Polar Bears plunge into the Atlantic Ocean! You can kiss my ass if you think I am going to do that tomorrow. It is supposed to be in the low teens and the wind will be blowing like a bitch!
  2. Ate at some nice restaurants this past year to name a few and we drank a couple beers in some killer dive bars too; The James Beard House, Peter Lugar, ABC Kitchen, Boulud Sud and Boulud Bar. Sadly we missed Jean Georges due to the shomits and were out of town for Per Se’ this year. For the Dive bars we went to a bar on recommendations from Andi and had killer frozen drinks, found the Trailer Park Bar and the Murphranks took us to a couple fun bars. Not too shabby if you ask me. I can already hear Grainbin Girl cursing me. Hey Allison, we are going to make a go of it at Rao’s. I will let you know how it turns out.
  3. Mrs. Trumpet and I celebrated 20 years of marriage! I think we may make it, I guess we need to talk about having kids now.
  4. Saw some stuff that I still could not explain to my parents/priest/doctor. I am still trying to wrap my head around the Coney Island Mermaid Festival and let’s not forget Elegant Elliot!
  5. Got to dust off the Passport and got off the island. Dominican Republic (during rainy season) and Rivera Maya/Isla Mujeres
  6. Visited 2 new cities this year and had a blast; Portland Maine and Gulf Shores Alabama.
  7. Got to welcome Wilhelmina & Light Bulb into the world and got to see little baby Kristy get married this year! More kids to eventually wipe our asses when we get old.
  8. Mrs. Trumpet powered through Grad School and only has 1 class left in 2018. Then her arse will be hanging a masters from NYU on the wall. I am very proud of her for undertaking this.
  9. We made not 1 but 2 trips to the New York City beaches this summer. And its not as bad as one would think. Thanks work wife and Andi!
  10. We dressed up a couple times this year for fun. NYPD Pipes and Drums Dinner, Marine Prom, Pigs and Pints during Food and Wine week!

img_0148God Love these folks. It will be cold as balls tomorrow!

IMG_1586Kicking Ass and taking names since she got up here!

IMG_1875I have been watching Robert Irvine’s shows now. He is great!

1408906_1280x720Love me some beach! And it only takes an hour train ride on either LIRR or MTA

IMG_1082The Mermaid Parade. LZ was a good sport and wore that heavy arse crown all day long!

IMG_0940Lisa Marie and her little sister!

img_0425You got plenty of time to have kids Doctor Kristy. We are so happy for you guys!

img_0338I still say that I won Valentines Day! Had 2 smoking hot dates that night! Hopefully I get to see the one on the left minus all these coats (get your head out of the gutter you pervs) this February down on another island below the 17th parallel.

IMG_2181Lobster Mac and Cheese? Why yes I will!

IMG_1288I go from Lobster Mac and Cheese to Waffle house. By the way does any of my NYC readers know if there is one up here? And it doesn’t take 3 subway transfers, a bus transfer and a burro ride?

IMG_0553This was a fun bar, it is a time machine and defiantly was staged but nevertheless it was fun. Oh and the Tots were killer too!

 

Happy New Year and may your 2018 be a good one! Thanks for reading!

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Special Saturday Post – Go Tigers Go

Been busy since getting back from Memphis. We just left town as the Flu Bug was arriving and have been overdosing on Airborne and all kinds of old wives tales on how to stay healthy. Anyway it was a good trip and we tried to see as many people as we could in such a short time.

I plan on ‘borrowing’ an idea from JENSIZED and post something similar to her 10 things she accomplished probably tomorrow. Right now it is snowing, I have to go get the dogs from the groomer and there should be cigars smoked this afternoon with the boys.

Go Tigers and if you are sitting on the couch right now and have Liberty Bowl Tickets get your ass off the couch. Go put on your bedroom comforter coat and get your ass to the game! We can’t let Iowa State show us up!

IMG_2460This is Monkey Head Maya’s sister. As you can see Maxi is much larger than Maya but we love them both.

IMG_2462Lady Killer – “Uncle CBT you paying for dinner tonight.”
Me – “Yeah but keep it light, I may be living in New York City but I don’t want to be reminded of those costs down here.”
Lady Killer – “No problem, Um Sir (*to the waiter) I will have the Surf and Turf!”

IMG_2463This is just F’d up! Why have wine in the grocery store if you can’t buy it on Sunday.

IMG_2466And for those of you wondering, no that dress that Mrs. Trumpet is wearing is not meant to be serious. It was her Tacky Sweater outfit that she got from China for $10.00 and took 6 weeks to arrive.

IMG_2468Yes, I even went to Mass on Christmas Day with my mother, wife, EGP, & EGP’s Dad. And no the church didn’t fall down either.

IMG_2467Because when you go to Mass you never know what you will see in the Nativity Scene. Take a look at one of the Wisemen that I put in the center of this pic. Is that M’effer wearing a pimp hat? I think so! Oh and if you laughed then you will join me in hell too! Welcome aboard!

IMG_2469Ziggy in the House!

IMG_2470Going to be disappointed that I can’t drink beer with this guy on New Years Day like we did last year!

IMG_2480Well I have always said that if it is going to be this cold it might as well snow. What an asshole I am!

 

Have a good Saturday and Thanks for reading.

Come on Lightbulb – Pics of the Week from Isla Mujeres y Manhattan

Merry/Happy Christmas, Happy Hanukah/Chanukah or Happy Holidays to you and to  my readers(all 14 of you!) If I have learned anything by living up here is that you always appreciate understanding someone’s heritage and or traditions. It is no lie that I grab my fair share of cabs but trust me when I say that I love asking the back of the head who is driving my cab; “So Boss Man….Tell me about your country.” If you come to NYC I implore you to please do this. Seriously please do it and you will find all kinds of country/family pride.

So I am going to get to the pics because I have had a helluva week and you guys (all 14 of you) hate my diatribe.

 IMG_2300Had a small fire on E70th a couple weeks ago.

IMG_2302Hey Guys is the Asian Fireman or @AB670 on board….yeah I know the answer.

IMG_2347RJ & Mal-O-Rie – So if we get this joint can you please promise not to procreate in the pool? #askingforafriend

IMG_2357I was warm here. I didn’t have to wear a bunch of cold weather gear.

IMG_2389Hey Staten Island S – Can you get us a bottle of this?

IMG_2394Tastes like Sambuca but its pretty good!

IMG_2411Maya is pissed and let me tell you how upset I was considering I was wearing shorts 2 says ago!

IMG_2412Maddy was not happy either!

IMG_24016 days in Mexico and I was offended that my beard was coming in grey. Pay no attention to the hairs on my head mind you! Hashbrown – at least I have hair!

IMG_2434Don’t blame me Maya….Blame the other one who put you in this outfit!

IMG_2440It screamed that I should come in and have a drink but it was 9AM and I had service issues. I will see you next week Village Tavern!

Seasoned Greetings to all my readers. All 14 of you!

Oh is this your first time to Isla Mujeres *I have heard it both ways

So after the wedding we decided to stay one more day in Mexico and spread the wealth so we headed over to Isla Mujeres for a night. We hitched a ride with Z(squared) to the airport and then headed to ferry port. While we were on the Ultra Mar ferry there was a gentlemen behind us who was talking up 2 Canadian Tourists who were making a day trip to Isla.

Gentlemen – “Oh is this your first time to Isla?”
Tourist – “Yes, we heard that we should visit the island while we are here in Mexico.”
Gentlemen – “Well the thing about Isla is that your first trip will be for a couple hours, then your next trip will be for a couple days, next thing you will be spending a week or month here. Or in my case, years.”
Tourist – “So what makes it so special.”
Gentlemen – “Hard to describe it to someone who has never been there but between the culture, the food and the locals you will probably love it.”

So here we were heading back to Isla and the gentlemen hit the nail on the head. Way back RJ/Mal-o-rie, Mrs. Trumpet and I took a day trip to Isla. Then we stayed for 3 nights before meeting up with English Mike and then last year we spent a week on Isla. Of course the  last trip someone came back with a big souvenir but we definatly had the Isla Bug.

We hung out at North Beach after checking into our hotel in town and had dinner at our favorite restaurant on the island. Naturally drinks at Bobo’s were in order and we checked out the local drinking establishments.

IMG_2342Love the streets in Isla, small quant and cobblestoned

IMG_2343Our hotel for the night. Clean room, fridge and microwave in the room and even had an outside patio.

IMG_2345Swung by Bobo’s to check on if Olivia’s was open for Dinner that night.

IMG_2346Trust me when I say that Mrs Trumpet was excited that this joint was open on a Monday night.

IMG_2349Hey Tilapia Lover & husband and others. So the beach erosion has took a bunch out of the beach here at Phoenix. What was 3 rows of these beach beds before you walked into the water is gone. Currently there is only 1 row and it is tight to say the least.

IMG_2351We ended up heading over to the point and made camp at one of the other beach clubs. Weather was spotty and the wind was a blowing but we had a good time.

IMG_2354Tons of Kite Surfers out there this day.

IMG_2356We kept on waiting on dude to wipe out on the broken dock but he did pretty good.

IMG_2363Our Favorite Soft Shelled Crab Joint was closed on Mondays. Bummer.

IMG_2368To kill time while having some drinks we played dominos.

IMG_2374Still slays me seeing Santa stuff down in the tropics.

IMG_2370A puffy coat? Come on Man! It isn’t that cold!

A good time was had by the Trumpets even if it was only for 24 hours.

 

 

 

Pictures of the Week – Mexican Style

I really need to make plans to go somewhere warm again very soon! This being cold is for the birds! Birds I tell you!

IMG_2317Shout out to my Minion Jason for this nugget of knowledge. “Always take a picture of your room number when checking in.” You have no idea how many times one would forget what room they were in.

IMG_2324Wonder why I was so thirsty on the Morning of Day 2. I need all the Water Por Favor!

IMG_2329My Mother has a philosophy that she never trusts a culture that doesn’t put cheese on their food. It makes perfectly good sense to me if you think about it!

IMG_2330Boy nothing make me harder than diamond in an ice storm than a flat top of grilled vegetables.

IMG_2332“I think there is way too much cheese on that!” – said no man ever!

IMG_2333Deep Down Ford is jealous that I am wearing my red shorts and that he and K don’t have kids because if they did then they would get some Maracas at Christmas from the Trumpets! #robocares

IMG_2334I am now a fan of the Hemingway Daiquiri. I had one a day. Stop Laughing. Seriously stop it!

Have a good weekend folks, it is supposed to be cold and snowy this weekend in Gotham!

 

 

 

The Trumpets Take on Mexico!

Aww, some of you guys actually missed me….ok so maybe not some but I know that reader number 4 sent me a message asking when I was going to get back on the keyboard. So we took off last Thursday for The Riviera Maya for 4 nights and one night on Isla Mujeres. The trip was for fun but also to see if one of my fellow tour bus ticket sales reps would ‘outkick his coverage’ and get married.

We stayed at the Iberostar Paraiso Maya resort which is one of 3 on the property. The weather was perfect by New York standards. Sure there was an overcast day with moderate winds and temps in the low 70’s but for the locals it was Ball Shrinking Cold. Shout out to my buddies in Belize who were 200 miles south of us who were bitching about the fringed temps. Suck it up Buttercup! Yesterday it was a low of 9 degrees and only got to 20 as the high but the winds were a bitch. Talk about a weather culture shock!

Anyway enough about me, congrats to JR(squared) on getting married. We wish you much happiness and enjoyed meeting both of your parents.

IMG_2316We got our seats at check in. They informed us that we had the comfort seats but we would be sitting behind each other. 20+ years of flying with Mrs. Trumpet and I finally get a Window Seat. Normally I am either in middle or we take 2 aisle seats.

IMG_2321Proof that our old asses made it to the disco at least one night while at the resort. Thanks to Romper Dude because I thought that this silly fad was just that. A fad.

IMG_2326I should have brought chalk to mark the walls. I never figured that place out. Granted I was sauced the majority of the time but still why can’t Iberostar have better signage?

IMG_2328There is nothing better than reading this email while you are waist deep in a pool smoking a cigar and drinking a Miami Vice boat drink!

IMG_2331Kuddos to the Iberostar for adapting this policy. No Popote Por Favor!

IMG_2337Tell me that those readers who were down there didn’t think it was odd with all the Mayan Porn in the bar?

IMG_2336Back when we went to the Barceló with ‘Lady Killer’ 3 Spring Breaks ago he would put Nutella on his waffles. He also would put all kinds of other shit on them but I tried it one day for breakfast. It wasn’t halfway bad.

IMG_2339JR(squared) made it official! I was disappointed that they did the “You are buying a goat” part in Spanish without the use of the microphone. They did the American Version first and then did the Spanish part very quickly following that.

I probably will do 2 more posts with the material I got downloaded on my phone. Some Good and a whole lot bad! FZ(squared) be afraid!

Thank you for calling Rao’s in East Harlem. Currently reservations for the rest of 2017 and all of 2018 are closed. Thanks for calling……

Are you kidding me? You mean to tell me that a restaurant is booked for all of 2018? I mean I could probably get a table at Per Se or that Fish joint on 51st street if I asked nicely, aka….greased the reservation clerk. How in the world can a joint be booked? Welcome to New York and the “Who’s Who” of New York.  Now if you are scratching your heads wondering what I am talking about let me give you a back story.

According to their website Rao’s New York is a culinary national treasure. Widely acclaimed for its authentic, southern Neapolitan Italian cooking and its home-style family ambiance. Rao’s was honored with a Pinnacle Three Stars from New York Times Restaurant Critic Mimi Sheraton describing the cuisine as “exquisitely simple Italian cooking.”

The Joint opened in 1896 and is one of the countries oldest family owned and operated restaurant running in its original location. Handing down cherished Pellegrino and Rao Traditions as its main ingredients.

The list of regulars reads like the “who’s who” of New York cognoscenti, including Woody Allen, Billy Crystal, Rob Reiner, Nicholas Pileggi and Danny Aiello. Legions of politicians, sports figures and matinee idols have jockeyed for a reservation. There, dining at Rao’s is a legendary experience so beloved that getting a seat is only possible if you are a regular and have, “table rights,” or if you’re lucky enough to be invited as a guest by someone who does. In Las Vegas, you are lucky enough to be our guest. From our family to yours, we invite you to sit back and relax while filling yourself with more than food. Cheers!

Sorry I hate to cut and paste so much I didn’t’ want to miss anything. What all that means is what the title of this worthless dribble of a post says – You ain’t getting in there for dinner. That is what is so funny about this place. It is only open Monday through Friday and is closed on the weekends. Who does that? Who can not be open on the weekends and still stay in business? Obviously the Pellegrino family is doing something right.

Now there are those who have gotten tables there. My cousin posted that she had dinner in this 10 table shoebox and I would love to hear the story. Even one of my fellow tour bus ticket sellers has boasted a bet with one of my contemporaries. Yep Amanda Astoria has made it clear that she will get a table (remember – we go in half for a table and I got the wine bill) when she found out that her main squeeze Jimmy Fallon has dined in one of the famous booths.

The guest list of those who “own” tables is pretty remarkable and I won’t spread rumors since you can GTS (Google That Shit) on your own. So who wants to go have drinks at the bar and see if we can get a table?

IMG_0884As you can see the place is very small and quaint. There is only one ‘deuce’ and the rest are either booths or larger tables.

IMG_0886Prosciutto and Peas – This is the dish that Frank and Ina cooked on her show one day. I can’t think of a better marriage.

IMG_0887Frank Pellegrino standing outside his namesake. Sadly Frank passed away this year but the business still runs under family ownership.

IMG_2287Snapped a pic the day I was up in that part of the world. Trust me when I say it is small.

So Muphranks – When are we going?

Pics from the Week – Christmas Edition

Man o Man has this week flown by. Amazing what happens when you have 4 days off and you roll into the week balls to the wall. This week was a good one and it is officially Christmas since our tree is lit, the one Rockefeller Center is lit and the former neighbor in Atlantic City is probably lit too!

IMG_2269Tree in Rockefeller Center the day before lighting.

IMG_2268Our Tree before lighting and trimming. #lotsofSap

IMG_2249The guys on 1st Ave at E71st were blowing and going.

IMG_2284Our Tree Lit and Decorated with the 8 ornaments.

IMG_2283Oh Look The Tree is Lit in Rockefeller Center *as seen on TV

IMG_2289It’s Christmas because the Doormen are working overtime!

Seasoned Greetings Folks!

Pictures of the Week (oh boy)

I am actually going to break this up into 2 pics of the week because if I am going to go to hell I don’t want to be judged because I also made fun of Christmas Trees. This past week was a wild one. I ran into Elegant Elliot twice, I saw a huge violation with the MTA and a bunch of wild stuff happened too! On a personal note, I love living in this city. It is quirky, weird, has strange people living here and it has embraced me with open arms.

IMG_2291I do love the “failing” media up here. Nothing is sacred!

IMG_2280Yes that is a bucket of KFC on the Queens Bound F Train

IMG_2241Soak it in Folks, Soak it in! Technically this dog is in compliance of being in a bag or kennel

IMG_2270And Here is LZ’s customer, I should have called these guys for the aforementioned picture

IMG_2224Very Strange to me, who can leave their clothes in the laundry room for 2 weeks and not need them. I would run out of undershirts after a week.

IMG_2267I love me some of this Little Brown Woman! She and I Snapchat all the time during Sunday Fundays

IMG_2290You know how wonderful it feels to have to purchase Suntan Lotion in December? Mexico bound next week!

IMG_2294Happy 5 years of having this little Monkey Head! I ran the Memphis Half Marathon 5 years ago and we went over to my dad’s house and they got her for me. They asked me what we should name her and this was the year the Mayan calendar was to end. I run a half marathon and the world should end – Hello Maya!

Be on the lookout for a noontime post! And have a good weekend!