Month: June 2018

Welcome To The Royal Palms Adult Shuffleboard

Have you ever looked at your Google Maps on your iFoam and something on the Map just jumps out at you? When we were still in Memphis and hadn’t moved up here I would scan Google Maps for hours. Hell that is how I knew there was a Cigar Inn 2 blocks away from our old residence. When we moved to Brooklyn I would do the same thing and there was this one location in Gowanus that caught my eye. Is there really a Shuffleboard bar walking distance from our apartment?

This past Friday I got home from work and Mary Louise informed me that I was responsible for finding something for us to do that evening. I really didn’t have the creative bug hitting me as I was dog ass tired and realized that I didn’t want to hit something that we had already visited. I recalled the Shuffleboard joint and informed her that we would be walking down to Gowanus Canals.

We arrive and let me tell you, from the doorman at the front door you know this place has their act together. We walk in and this place is HUGE. they have 10 full size shuffleboard courts. They have areas with fullsize Genga and Connect 4 games. 2 full bars and each night they have a food truck that shows up and pulls into the building. The décor is Florida Pink and the music. They played Leo Sayer for Christsake! This place is great. We had a couple beers and decided that this place is the place to go when it is cold as hell outside.

IMG_3509They have all kinds of old school decorations. Notice the pennants hanging on the wall. They are from all the small Florida High Schools

IMG_3510Lots of Old School Seating and yes those palm trees in the distance

IMG_3529Full Bar and lots of beers on tap

IMG_3528But of course they have a DJ spinning Old School Vinyl

IMG_3526Textured Wall covering for the bathrooms.

IMG_3521Oh look they got Flocked

IMG_3514Cue the Captain and Tennille music. Yes I bet the women will wear Kaftans.

IMG_3516I think a great team name would be “Bless Your Heart” – What say you Murphranks?

IMG_3518Food Truck backing up into the place with a roll up door is key.

IMG_3517They have props you can wear while Shuffle Boarding

IMG_3520Beer is served in Mason/Jelly Jars

IMG_3519Object is to put the Disk inside the numbed triangle. On the line equals zero points.

IMG_3512They actually have a stage for bands and such. Not sure where “the flock” goes but we shall see.

Like I said there is some cool shit out there!

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Emma Stone, Billy Jean King, and Paul McCartney walk into a bar.

Actually they walk into Alan Cumming’s bar, Club Cummings. This is a true story according to the bar owner who we went to see on Saturday night with Maria and Bill. His show “Legal Alien” is a mash up of songs, funny stories but he only down side of the show was that it was at friggin midnight! Seriously don’t you entertainers realize that we us old folks have to be in bed by then? Anyway Alan Cumming is a riot and gave us his outtake on certain issues that the crowd all agreed upon.

IMG_3533Joe’s Pub sure is proud of its Vodka.

IMG_3534I guess I need to start selling more Tickets to the Double Decker Bus tours on Monday.

IMG_3538He puts on a great show

IMG_3543Lace Sleeveless Shirt – No it doesn’t make you look Gay.

Hope you had a good weekend. We sure did!

 

Pictures of the Week

Well we made it to Friday guys! The schools are out for the summer up here so it is officially summer in the North East. This weekend we are excited in the fact that we really don’t have much planned other than a show on Saturday night/Early Sunday morning. Mary Louise told me that she wants to sleep in tomorrow as her ass has been getting up early heading to Penn to catch early trains into New Jersey.

Anyway here are some pictures from the past weeks;

IMG_3495Such a mean woman. Looking out for my best interest so I don’t get my ass fired.

IMG_3480Since we have grills on the 3rd floor I took advantage of them. Honey Ginger Teriyaki marinated Pork Tenderloin that Ernie Mellor of A Moveable Feast/Hog Wild Catering makes.

IMG_3481Hog Wild’s BBQ Shrimp on the grill (they ask that we cook on the foil) very strange if you ask me.

IMG_0428What in the Actual Fuck? Anyone who wears shorts with a suit aka Eddie Munster should have their throat punched. Do you hear me?

IMG_3419Coming up on the 3 year anniversary of us living up here.

IMG_3421When in Times Square

IMG_3423Someone buy my mothers house won’t you? We are jumping the gun and putting her in the Retirement Home with an open Bar. (I am kidding, she is moving near my sister in East Memphis)

IMG_3498A Midtown Uniform Sighting. It was in the mid 80’s that day but douche nozzle felt the need to wear a vest to keep him warm.

IMG_3501I still don’t understand the Pickleback thing

IMG_3500Took her 4 years to finally understand that when I tell her something alcohol related just accept it and don’t ask questions.

IMG_3499If it was only in my size…

Have a good weekend

 

Happy NBA Draft Day Folks!

Or as Memphis Grizzlies Fans affectionally call it – Passover.

Seriously Chris Wallace don’t Fuck this up. Your little garage sale, fire the coach, giving the handjob to the Spaniard has grown weary on Grit and Grind fans. Even the Fake News Media up here says that firing Fizdale was a bone head move. The Barclay’s center is 4 blocks from my home and I can always give the homeless in 16 Sycamores park my Grizz gear. But they probably won’t take it.

pg2_g_thabeet_576Never Forget Folks!

We will see in 12 hours what you do.

Seriously This Town Sucks – Saturday

So when I left you with Yesterday’s Post we finished up with drinks with UWS Holly. Saturday we had a double header since we were going to attend the Coney Island Mermaid Parade. Later that evening we were to assemble at Joe’s Pub to listen to Losers Lounge tribute to the late Tom Petty. Seriously, like I said yesterday; if you couldn’t find something to do this past weekend you weren’t looking.

My previous Mermaid Parade date LZ was busy with her 1-2 step class so Mary Louise Geranium and I headed on the Q to Coney Island. Unlike last year’s almost rained out parade we had another beautiful weekend day so and as T-Rex’s mother would say “The whore’s were out in full force!” because it was crowded! Like front row at the Beale Street Music Fest Crowded. We decided to take refuge in one of our normal Coney Island haunts and the crowd did tone down a tad. We ventured out a little but considering we had a full evening we decided that “Day Drinking” was a bad idea if we were to make the 9:30 show.

We swung by the new Mexican joint just opened up in Fort Greene and then took a little nap before the show. You know with a Losers Lounge show from those that I have reported in the past that the line up and the band were going to be great. This tribute we had some new performers as well usual the old ones and they didn’t disappoint.

Onto the pictures and sorry to you perv’s because I am not posting any pictures of girls wearing only sequins or jewels on their boobs. I now have a younger crowd following this worthless dribble. That and I don’t want my Grandmother or sister to bust up on my 14 year old nephew beating like it owes him money because he saw a half naked girl from Bay Ridge on this post. (yep I went there)

IMG_3440That is someone’s daughter right there folks. She is going to have an interesting sunburn on her boobs.

IMG_3441Did they realize that it is going to be hot as balls out there on Saturday

IMG_3442Since we didn’t have a crown nobody wanted to get a picture with us.

IMG_3341That is some good stuff here folks!

IMG_3448We miss you Tom!

IMG_3462Julian putting out some Traveling Wilbury’s

IMG_3454I don’t recall ever listening to Marcy Harriell but I am a fan

IMG_3449The Joe McGinty 7

IMG_3474Ending the night with the Losers!

IMG_3476Mary Louise and New York’s version of Michael Donahue aka – that’s a lot of hair!

Like I said, the weekend really sucked!

 

 

This Town Sucks!

I mean there is not shit to do here in the summer! I am kidding because if you didn’t find something to do this past weekend then you really weren’t fucking trying. Friday afternoon we decided to meet up with UWS Holly for drinks. Now back in the days of us living and working in the UES it was kind of easy finding a place. But with momma coming in hot from Dirty Jersey, me being down in the West Village and Holly being in the UWS we figured that the Top of the Metropolitan Museum was only fitting.

The weather on Friday was prefect. Not too hot, not too cold and we didn’t have any rain on Friday! It was a win-win! Now there is a big ass disclaimer on attending any rooftop in New York City. Bring an ass-load of cash! Seriously it costs a lot of money to catch your buzz overlooking the city. I won’t go into detail on what a round of two glasses of wine and a specialty drink cost you but it does create a moment of pause when you think that you want to get your swerve on the top of the Met. It was fun and if you are here in the city during the summer I suggest you put this on the list.

IMG_3431It has been a while since I was in the proper Museum and we never went to the Greek Wing to get to the rooftop. We need to head back.

IMG_3428Looking towards Midtown

IMG_3429Notice that the folks on the rooftop dress up just like the Peabody Rooftop bars.

IMG_3430Looking towards the UWS and the Dakota is in the distance. Or is it the Ghostbusters building. I need to work on visiting the UWS more often.

IMG_3432Damn Nova even has her own building up here. She has the cool president, free healthcare, a building with her name on it but she doesn’t have Bud Light. So take that!

More tomorrow as Saturday we cranked up the Damn Volume and Ripped off the Knob!

 

Busy Weekend

Sorry Folks but my Fun-O-Meter was pegged this past weekend and I didn’t have time to jot anything down yesterday. I will work on some posts this evening and will bring you up to speed by Tuesday.

In the meantime and I would be remiss if I didn’t offer my deepest condolences to the Jankowski and Trotter families. If you look up the phrase “Bad Ass Warrior” in the dictionary you would find Teri’s picture because that is what she was. She sadly lost her battle to cancer this weekend. I do draw solace knowing that she is no longer hurting. I am sure she was hugging her papa Leonard’s neck yesterday up in heaven.

35492578_10217367475925548_4309798573987332096_nTeri was a warrior and lived her life on her terms. Her Pink Wig Project gave pink wigs to cancer patients and raise funds for genetic testing and research.

I will be back tomorrow.

 

Pictures of the Week

Wow what a week, I am glad that we are here at Friday! Happy early Fathers Day to all you dads out there. Esp to RJ, Will, The Asian, J.K., and I am sure I am missing some others.  Here are some pictures from this past week.

IMG_3409What is this we see in Tina’s Cuban on W56th? Why yes it is a Midtown Uniform. If you are on the IG seek out Midtown Uniform as you will find even in mid June it is perfectly acceptable to wear a vest with your dress clothes. Hey NJ Dave – walk up front and I will act like I am taking a picture of your fancy backpack.

IMG_3411The Wife texts me her flight info so I know how much time I have before I have to shag ass home and clean the house.

IMG_3382Elvis in a Sardine Can

IMG_3383Why yes Vivian Longstreet has a Notorious RBJ candle in her bathroom. We have a sign that asks that you don’t do cocaine.

IMG_3389Why yes there is Natty Light in Brooklyn

IMG_3410God I love messing with Tourists!

IMG_3416Tickets purchased for Mexico – only thing left is for RJ to get a vasectomy so he doesn’t pollenate Val-O-Rie again in Mexico.

Be careful out there folks. Its a Jungle and this Saturday is the Coney Island Mermaid Festival!

 

They have WHAT in Grand Central?

Since I have 13 different subway lines for my bidding to get into Manhattan I find that I use different lines to get into different parts of the city.

  • Need to get up to see the Boys at the Cigar Inn – Take the Q
  • Need to get over to the West Village – Take the A, C or E or the dreaded F train
  • Got to head to the East Side of Manhattan – Take the 4 or 5 to Grand Central.
  • Got to get to Penn Station (Mrs. Trumpet does this when she goes to Jersey) – Take the 2 or 3

Lately I have found that go into Grand Central Station and if you have been there you know that this sucker is huge. About a couple week back UWS Holly posted that she was getting her boots shined. I knew that there was a shoeshine on the lower level but this location was different than the picture. She told me that it was in one of the passageways. I wasn’t really sure where it was until the work wife (the domestic one) showed me one day. Literally (I am not sure which one of you hate that term but sorry) you can walk from the Train platform all the way to 47th street underground and not be in the elements.

So the other day I found the 45th street passageway and since I had to go see one of my Diamond District customers I headed that way. As I walked by I see a kiosk open and I had to take a double take. Are they really re-stringing Tennis Racquets in there? Yep, you can get your Head (see what I did there KLCMan) strung up with fresh catgut on your way to work. That is cool shit if you ask me! Now I had to google where the tennis court is located so I will try to find that on my next trip to Grand Central.

IMG_3359Hey boys I got an old Wilson T2000 can you re-string it for me?

That’s what I love about this city, there is always some shit that just surprises you.

In Memoriam – Anthony Bourdain

We all can recall what we were doing when we found out when Elvis Died. How about when we found out that Princess Diana was killed in the car crash. What about John-John Kennedy when he and his wife were killed in the plane crash? Well this past Friday I know what I was doing when I found out that Anthony Bourdain died. It was as I was getting ready to head out the door to head into the city and I got that text from my fellow chef stalker GrainBinGirl. 5 minutes later I got a text from Pepe with the same information.

First thoughts were – No way, not Bourdain. I clicked on the CNN link and the worst was confirmed. If you have ever read this worthless dribble of a blog you know that I have huge ass man crush on Bourdain. His writing, his stories, his love of exploring different cultures and naturally his love of food and drink were things that I envied. I read all of his books cover to cover. I binge watched No Reservations, The Layover, and Parts Unknown ad nauseum. When he went on tour I bought the damn tickets. Like I said, I loved that man and wanted to be just like him.

Now he is gone and a huge hole is in the hearts of millions of people and his fans. I have read pretty much every tribute to him. Watched the CNN memoriam and it still is unbelievable that I won’t ever get a chance to drink a beer with him in one of the many dive bars here in the city. Much less watch him visit my hometown, do a show on it and probably say something that will probably piss off half of twitter. KC Jayhawk was very bitter when he did the show on Kansas City.

While reading some of the comments on twitter I recall someone saying that the best way to honor Bourdain was to act like him. Go visit an unfamiliar place, order something that you have never tried before, and ask a complete stranger about their life. I know that Tony probably didn’t agree with everyone that he met along his journey but he respected them, he got to hear their side of the story and he grew from it. This is what made his shows so fucking good.

IMG_3380Never in a million years would I imagine that I would see this tribute on “the pass” at Per Se.

IMG_3393I don’t know why I made it a point to swing by the shuttered Les Halles yesterday but I had to. Deep down I know that this probably pisses Bourdain off because he wasn’t a fan of fame but people need closure.

IMG_3394To read some of the notes is a testament to how much he was loved by all walks of life, cultures and people.

IMG_3395I could have spent hours reading these but the crowd was rather large today.

IMG_3396Lots of flowers and cards

IMG_3398It is impressive to say the least. Like Graceland or Morrison’s grave impressive

IMG_3399Puts a smile on my face seeing this tribute

IMG_3401All kinds of stuff being left for his memorial

This one is going to hurt for a while. Condolences to his family, his friends and his fans.