Brooklyn Baby

We Made it to Friday and we didn’t have to kill anyone….Yet!

This is what Trevor, front desk concierge, and I say each Friday while I am taking Monkey Head Maya out for her morning pee in the park. This week was a fun one. I survived circling the sun 49 trips and am now gearing up for a helluva 50th! Geranium and I went for drinks with some of my clients and tonight we are going to meet the Hot Tub “Wet Bandit” who is in town. Saturday is up in the air and Sunday we are going to see Lightbulb and the Asian Fireman.

Here are some pics from the past couple of weeks. I know I have been remiss on posting this but I have been busy.

Hey Country – You recall this building? The Former Flat Hotel!
I think it is a requirement if you are going to have a dive bar you have to have Christmas Tree Lighting.
This Joint reminded me of The Subway Inn on 2nd Avenue.
We will be back in Hudson to have a proper drink here again!
Goodbye Old Couch, we had to part with it to make room for some other stuff.
Glad to know the Fyre Festival dude (who I believe is still in prison) is running another scam.
I am a bad New Yorker if I didn’t at least post one pic from the St. Patrick Day Post Band Party.
Thanks to Stone, Vivian and Della for a great weekend upstate.
First Outside Cigar I was able to smoke.
She is a little shit but she is our little shit!

Have a good weekend!

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Bonus Pictures Midweek

I have been negligent in my postings but considering that today I am celebrating 17,898 days of walking this earth I will bless you with some extra pictures.

FYI – The shell may be 49 but the spirit is and forever will be 12 years old having the time of my life. To quote the band Kiss – if its too loud you are too old!

Look who snuck into smoke cigars with the boys. GZ.
If I did have a tombstone (F That I want to be cremated) it would read #RoboCares
Don’t arch your back while peeing?
Who are all these children in this picture!
Sorry GrainBin Girl, he wasn’t in when I had lunch there last week.
Go see Elton John’s show if you can!
49 years old, overweight, greying on the sideburns, bad left shoulder, but still rocking a Midtown Uniform! *Those pills in the lower left are Germaniums by the way. The Bite guard is mine but those are hers!

Have a good Wednesday!

Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 2019

A while back Vivian asked if we wanted to get some tickets to attend the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame at Barclays. *disclaimer – I really didn’t understand the question but considering it was 2 blocks from our studio I agreed.* When we got closer to the event I was kind of luke warm then I was on a subway and did a google of who was being inducted;

  • The Cure (never saw them live)
  • Def Leppard (saw them in the Mid South Coliseum when I was a child and the drummer had 2 arms)
  • Janet Jackson (I vaguely remember the wardrobe malfunction)
  • Stevie Nicks (Fleetwood Mac show at BSMF many moons ago)
  • Radiohead (saw them at MSG 2 years ago, killer show)
  • Roxy Music (they broke up in 2011 so the answer was no)
  • The Zombies (Negative)

Holy Crap! I get to see Roxy Music, The Cure, Def Leppard, Stevie Nicks Solo and I don’t have to stand at an overpriced music festival in Palm Springs or New Orleans? Color me up Baby! Let me just say right now that (and I am not sure if it goes back to Cleveland next year) if you are a music fan then you need to do this! Sadly Radiohead and Janet didn’t play the event but HOLY FUCKING SHIT Stevie Nicks had Don Henley do a song with her. Then Harry Stiles (Still don’t know who he is or care) did the Tom Petty Duet with Stevie and it was killer.

The downside to the show is that it is long. But then if you can say that you were in the same room as; Steven VanZant, Trent Reznor, David Byrne, Susanna Hoffs of the Bangles, Brian May of Queen, Simon LeBon and John Taylor from Duran Duran and Harry Stiles it is bonus too. Sadly I didn’t get any great pics of the shows as it is a copyright infringement but here are the approved pics.

The tables are where the VIP’s sit but I don’t really think there is any dining going on. We by the way were sitting in a box centerfield thanks to American Express.
Stephanie Lynn Nicks killed it! She may be a robot when it comes to her show (she thought that Harry Stiles was in a different band) but she is the consummate performer.
Saw these boys over at MSG. I only know 3 songs but they had a great speech.
Oh David Byrne was inducting them into the hall. How fucking cool is that!
I only know of 5 songs these guys do (and 3 of them are on the Alex’s Tavern’s Juke Box but to say that I saw a reunited show just for the Hall of Fame. What you got boys? Have you see Roxy Music live?
Roxy Music put on a great show and sounded like they didn’t break up at all!
If you graduated from SAA, SDS, IC, MUS, Hutchison, or St. Mary’s you would have known who these boys were. Duran Duran!
Texted my father a pic of Silvio inducting the R&R HOF Singles groups and his comment was “He isn’t country is he?”
Saw the Robert Smith interview where he destroyed the reporter about being excited. I assure you readers that he was very humble when he was accepting the induction. Still scary as shit with that get up!
The Lead Up to Janet’s induction. We were under the impression she was going to perform.
Janet Jackson’s speech. Let’s just say that she was a tad off.
Did you know the lead singer of the Bangles is 60. I am kinda feeling old.
5 band performing means 5 monitor worlds. Plus the MC stuff and the BOH world. This was impressive to see from a birds eye view. “Robo to Allison or Harmony”
FYI – he was the only one who didn’t have a teleprompter for his induction of Def Leppard. Maybe he should tell 46-1 how to do this.
Rule #1 for being a Rock and Roll Band – Don’t get fat or lose your hair!

Like I said, it was a great night and I can’t wait to see how HBO does this show.

How Far Is It From…..

Looks like New York City is going to be a favorite destination for a bunch of our friends from Memphis and from all parts of the world. We love it and hope that our schedules mesh so we can spend some time catching up. One question that we get a lot from our friends is “How far is it from where you live?”

If you look at the greater part of Manhattan north of 14th Street it resembles a rectangle. The streets are mapped out in a grid and it is pretty easy to give directions; instead of saying “1300 First Avenue” you can say “1st Avenue between 71st and 72nd.” When we lived in the UES we found that it was a bitch getting cross town. However, when going North and South it was pretty easy. To give you good way to put the city into quadrants; 5th Avenue is the East/West Line and 59th Street is North/South Line. People would ask us all the time where should they get a hotel. We found that even though it was chaos 24/7 around Times Square it was the best starting place because of it being centrally located in Manhattan. The Surrey and The Mark hotels are very nice hotels but being tucked up by 77th and Madison Avenue makes it hard getting downtown or around the city. Same goes with the Upper West Side. (Sorry UWS Holly)

When we were looking for places to live we found that Downtown Brooklyn was a really good option for a number of reasons. For starters it is 2 subway stops from Manhattan. Add to that we have over 13 different subway lines to pick and choose from to get into the city. This really helps when lines are down on the weekend. We looked briefly at Long Island City over in Queens to live but ruled that out when looking at subway options. The L line was slated (at the time we were apartment looking) to be shut down and the 7 train always has issues so that was ruled out.

When saying that having 13 different subway lines to pick and choose from is a big deal let me explain further. If I want to get to the West Side of Time Square or Penn Station I would take the 2/3 from Nevins Street. If I wanted to get to the East Side of Manhattan and say Grand Central I would take the 4/5 also from Nevins. If I was going to the West Village I might take the A/C from Hoyt & Schermerhorn. And If I was going to say a certain cigar joint in the UES I would take the Q from DeKalb. (Confused Yet?) Let me tell you about a little secret that a lot of New Yorkers use on a regular basis. Google Maps is your best friend. To say that I use that app more than anything is an understatement. It can give you quickest the subway routes and if MTA has their act together it can give you a pretty good spot on schedule.

Now with anything there are always exceptions, and even Google Maps can fail you from time to time. If it is the weekend they will take down lines and or stations for maintenance. Sometimes Google gets that news but in the case of yesterday when there were electrical fires because of the snow and ice. This can create some anxiety if you are not used to the subway but the uniformed agents on hand are always helpful to give suggestions. Hell even fellow New Yorkers are happy to give you advice. It is almost a game with some people in giving the best suggestions. Trust me.

That being said here are some aprox travel times from our joint in Crime-Free Downtown Brooklyn direct to various spots in the city;

  • Downtown Brooklyn to Grand Central – 28 minutes via the 4/5
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Times Square – 30 minutes via Q or the 2/3
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Cigar Inn in the UES – 34 minutes via the Q
  • Downtown Brooklyn to 9/11 Memorial – 20 min via the 4/5
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Empire State Building – 25 min via the B or Q
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Red Rooster in Harlem – 44 min via the 2/3
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Maya’s Dog Groomer – 39 minutes via 4/5
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Yankee Stadium – 47 minutes via the 4
  • Downtown Brooklyn to Mary Louise’s Office in Summit NJ – 1hr 22 min via the 2/3 to Penn Station then NJ Transit to Summit NJ (I suspect she goes to Japan to avoid this commute)

Not that I don’t love Taxi’s or Uber/Lyft but you will pay more and 99.9% of the times be delayed due to traffic depending on the time of the day.

The Red Dot at the bottom is our pad. Getting into lower Manhattan is a breeze and taking express trains can cut a normal 45 min car ride in half.
Of course when your 2 of your main arteries are shut down it makes for an interesting travel day. I guess you could say that 240 was shut down that day.

So who is coming to see us?

Mary Louise Needs to Bring Her Ass Home!

The Dog and I are starting to get on each others nerves. Seriously, she has been gone since last Tuesday and we are missing her. The Seamless Delivery dude and I know each other on a first name basis. The good news is that I have watched pretty much every episode of “M*A*S*H*” and “Two and a Half Men” (She hates those shows) but the DVD is getting full of her midget and Dr. Pimple Popper shows.

Mary Louise requested me to get her a hair appointment. I guess it is kinda hard to book stuff when you are 14 hours away.
Oh No PETA offending sushi this time Geranium?
The Dog and I play a rousing game of “Did you just fart?”

And for those of you wondering when @Maya_in_NYC Instagram will be posting again. She gets in Friday afternoon from her flight from Toyko!

Pictures of the Week – We worked a Full Week this week and we lived to tell about it!

I was wondering why my ass was dragging this morning, then I realized it. Hell, this is the first time in the past 3 weeks that I have had to drag my ass into the city 5 consecutive days. For those of you who do read this worthless dribble and happen to be on Metro North, LIRR or NJT I expect you to fully tell me to “GFY CBT” I get it, you have a longer commute. (NON NEW YORK READERS) – I only have to take 1 to 3 subway stops to get into the city. Seriously, I have the easiest commute in the world.

So New Year, New Me right? Believe it or not, I am actually trying to clean up my act. I am nearing the 49 trips around the sun anniversary. After 50 trips I have to really be careful because I may break a hip or have to go to Canada for free healthcare. Ok enough silliness, here are the pictures that I have had on my iFoam for the past couple of days.

Can’t recall where I snapped this pic but I love that it is our former hood.
EGP is showing me her mad selfie skills.
Sent this to Mary Louise while she was in Spain on the 4th. Her comment back to me was “Did he die?” She isn’t a fan due to a long night Jam session one night at 595.
My Boss – You want to grab a drink? Me – Can’t I am studying for my Blood Test again. She then asked what day I was on my Juice Cleanse.
RJ and Fuck-Tard – You would love our building for obvious reasons!

Hope you have a good weekend and it isn’t as cold as it is going to be here. We are heading to Northwest Arkansas this weekend to see family and friends.

Also Shout out to the Pirate/Beatnik and Time Square Performer who happen to read this worthless dribble. They just completed an important milestone in their ‘remodeling’ project.

Year in Review – The Other Shit

Editors Note – I am not sure when I am going to publish this post. But in order to give a you proper understanding of my next statement today is the day that the President walked out of the Boarder wall/Government Shutdown meeting with Democrats.

Damn I miss that Anthony Bourdain isn’t here anymore. I could really use his commentary on current administration and his thoughts on immigrants coming into this country.

We lost a bunch of good people this past year. We lost Maddy our beloved Monkey Head, who would have told me that 4 months gone we still miss that fluff ball. I will get to that later but we also learned a bunch of new things about ourselves and we saw a bunch of cool stuff living here in the North East. Let’s dive in shall we?

Music and Shows are always big on our radar. We went to more Losers Lounge Shows than I care to think about. Tribute to Barbara Streisand was a good one. The Last Waltz was so-so, but we enjoyed the shit out of the Disco Cruise around the Hudson with the band. We also saw some concert shows this past year. Thanks to a certain someone who po-po’d on a ticket Mary Louise got to see “The Piano Man” from a suite. We caught Phil Collins at the Barclays and listened to some Elvis Impersonators on Long Island Off the beaten path we got to see the Airshow on the middle of Jones Beach for Memorial Day. Mary Louise also got to see some Broadway shows; Frozen, Waitress, One on this Island with different friends. I would be remiss to say that I saw David Byrne this year. Still one of the better shows I ever saw. Yes I said that again.

We had a bunch of different friends come up and see us too. We got to hang out with LoveBug one weekend and had a blast with her. But we can’t forget when EGP and Cali rolled into town and attended Slavic Easter Sunday Mass with us. Northwest Arkansas came over one weekend and we even had our favorite Venezuelan make an appearance while we were in the city on a Sunday. Our former dog & house sitters came to town and we got to see some Memphis BBQ guys roll into town one weekend. The invitation is always open to come see us. We have 2 hotels very close to us if you have to stay close to our joint in Brooklyn.

We explored our new neighborhood of Downtown Brooklyn and found a whole bunch of new Dive Bars to frequent. By the way, and I have said it before; Moving in New York really sucks. The good news is that we are in our new home and we really enjoy living here. Of course the Muphranks have accused us separately of being bad influences. I will just say that it isn’t our fault that the mixologists at a couple of Park Slope bars over-serve patrons. We also went to the Rose Mansion this summer with Z(squared) and I even enjoyed it (just don’t tell anyone) but didn’t take a selfie there.

Sadly we said goodbye to some really good people this past year. Yes the loss of Anthony Bourdain is still a shock to me. But what it really does is cry out to people that on the exterior people may have their shit together but inside they need help. You can never know so here is my advice. Be good to people. Don’t be a dick. You have absolutely every right to disagree about politics but you don’t have to make it personal and attack people’s character. Stop and think about what you say or about to tweet. If you are a bully then you should automatically get to have your nuts kicked in. End of story.

Maddy hated it when ML’s got the outfits out. We sure do still miss her.
Donahue’s Doppelganger singing at Losers Lounge
Had a lot of fun with this knucklehead.
Jones Beach for the Airshow with the Muphranks
Elvis on Long Island
David Byrne at Kings Theater
The Gang at Phil Collins
Rocking the Hudson
Graduate with your Masters from NYU, Start a new job, Move to Brooklyn, Keep your shit together during it all – She is a fucking Rock Star!
We miss you Poppy!
On the 2/3 train you will travel by Franklin Street. God Bless the MTA as they put “Respect” signs as you travel by the stop.
A Fort Greene Gem I tell you!
Forgot about seeing Alan Cummings too! Also not a fan of our current Commander in Chief
The Royal Palms Shuffleboard is in the hood too!
A Brooklyn Dive Bar – Dimly lit bar, cash only, Tabs are considered a diet drink from the late 80’s
She swam over to see us!
Since Mary Louise occasionally travels on Sunday I find myself hanging with these two on Sunday Funday.
Our new place is kinda cool. We have an outdoor theater
Pay no attention to those glasses on the table.

Have a good day and remember what I said earlier; Don’t be a Dick!

Let’s Recap Shall We? Trips and Food

We were really busy in 2018. I sit back and think about what all that we did last year I had to go to the calendar 4 times. I mean we were fucking busy in 2018. We went a bunch of places this year and that was even with Mary Louise doing all her shit this year. From her group final presentation for NYU, graduating from NYU, starting a new career, moving to Brooklyn, and not divorcing my ass we ate and traveled a bunch.

Made a trip to Belize to see our friends in February. We made a trip to Memphis to become God Parents for Willimena Esmerelda. We went to Bay Ridge Brooklyn for dinner a couple times. We made a trip Upstate to the Hudson Valley. We went to Philly a couple times, Baltimore for Crab, ML went to The Hamptons during the summer. Oh we also made a trip to Mexico with RJ, Mal-O-Rie, and Senorita JL. Went to St. Louis for Baby Fine Hair and Kristina’s wedding in the fall. The new stadium on campus and great friends made us visit Northwest Arkansas and then we made Memphis for Christmas.

Now here is where I am going to get some serious Fucking hate mail. We ate some serious good grub this past year. LeCoq Rico for a fancy Chicken dinner one night. Enjoyed some fine Swiss wines with the Muphranks along with some Raclette (think broiled half wheel) of cheese. We enjoyed one of Geoffrey Zakarian’s restaurants with our friend Tucker. Had an authentic Cheese Steak while we were in Philly (you know for the hangover) and it was good. For our anniversary we dined at Benjamin’s Steakhouse and the steak was good. And to finish out the holidays we of course ate at one of Thomas Keller’s joints in the Time Warner Center. I know that I am missing some places but I am going to end this because some folks may send me some more hate mail.

I love this woman! We have a lot in common and both being damn good looking is the beside the point.
Breakfast View in San Pedro Town Belize
Ironic that when we lived in Memphis we weren’t too far from the Forum. Now in Brooklyn we aren’t too far from this sucker.
Bad Lighting on Mary Louise but this is her the morning of her graduation. And let the record show that I will punch her in the dick if she goes for her Doctorate.
On the way up the Hudson River to see Vivian and Stone
Crab is good
That kid is going to break hearts I tell you!
No lies being told here at all!
That kid is going to be something I tell you!
Who loves some broiled Cheese
Trust me this is some good shit right here!
This be our new joint by the way!
Me and the Bride at her wedding!
Who doesn’t love some good Pastrami from Katz’s
Shrimp Sticks from Blue Water Grill in Belize. This is worth the Fucking Trip to Belize in the middle of a Hurricane and twice on Sunday.
Boy did this picture get some traction in Memphis.
Don’t laugh folks this is some good shit here!

At least I didn’t post any more pictures of dinner from Per Se.

Pictures of the Week

Man I took some serious hell from some of you guys for having a fancy dinner last weekend. Guess I need to step up my game and have dinner at Eleven Madison Park and REALLY piss you off. Anyway here are some pictures from last week.

This is Hockey – They play it here in the North East
Had to break out the warm coat last week
Merry Christmas Chloe! Hope you have a wonderful Holiday!
If anyone is missing a Nose Ring it was on the G Train
Love you too Nova! Fun going down Memory (Front Street) in Belize
Mary Louise is now Boujie when she sits in the First Class seats
Got me a burger on Thursday!
Nunchucks are legal in New York City. Who wants some?
Maya is ready for Mary Louise to come home

Next week we will be busy with travels to Memphis and then back.

Random Pictures on The Phone

Been busy for us during Christmas Season here in the big city. With the holidays rapidly approaching we have been busy getting gifts and naturally sending them to Memphis wrapped. Note to self – when sending a box to your mothers house and she has moved it may be a good idea to get the correct address. Thankfully FedEx was able to correct the address and the customer service agent didn’t laugh at me too bad. 

This week we are busy with Holiday parties (Mary Louise’s old work peeps) and we have some other events to attend this weekend. Mary Louise heads back to Seattle on Tuesday so it will be just me and the dog for the week. I will keep you posted. Anyway here are some pictures that I have had for the past couple of weeks. 

Broke Out the 3 Piece Suit the other day since it was Ball Shrinking Cold

The Nephew was trying to get a little too Cute with Uncle CBT and Aunt Mary Louise on his Christmas List

Caught the Griz Nets Game a couple weeks back with Vivian and Stone

Forgot about this one. Has it really been 7 years Muppet? Now look at you! See you and Tink (who is celebrating her birthday today 12.12)  next fall! 

Mr. 3 First Names and Asian Fireman tell me this is a Hazmat/Rescue/Engine that T.O.D.D. used to work on. 

Maya likes it when Mary Louise works from Home. 

Sent this to St. Aloysius the other day on his birthday. 

I will have something better I promise.