CBT in NYC

Conversations of the Rich and Famous in Coffeehouses

When I am not day drinking, smoking cigars or eating food that is bad for me, I have to hold down a full time job. Sadly Mrs. Trumpet hasn’t hit the bigtime and let me be a kept man so each day I put on my suit and head out to work. I sell those bus tickets to the tourists in Times Square *not my real job* and have to keep up with emails and ish like that on my laptop. We have an office in the Garment District but I would rather masturbate with a cheese grater than go there. No I am not being one of those surly people, it is out of my way and I never get anything accomplished when I go there.

Rather than stay in the apartment I like to get out and normally hole up at a satellite office on W45th street. Yes it is still out of my area but I can get work done and steal office supplies and get free coffee. *again not true because they have crappy coffee and shitty pens*  When my schedule requires me to stay well north of E60th Street I normally head to my favorite coffee shop on Lexington and E70th street. I get my double bull espresso and fancy NYC sparking bottled water and bang out work on the laptop at the outside tables.

The people in the UES are interesting folks. Some make more money than God and spend more in HOA fees and mortgages in a month than some people make in a year. What keeps me grounded by living up here is eavesdropping on some of their conversations.  Below are some of the better examples;

Bubbe 1- “Aren’t you worried about this latest outbreak of Legionnaires disease that they found in the water chiller in the UES?”
Bubbe 2 – “I thought that it was in Flint Michigan, we hardly use the water from our apartment for drinking or cooking.”
B 1 – “No the outbreak of Legionnaires is the disease that resembles the flu and can kill you. Not related to the water from the tap.”
B 2 – “You will have to excuse me, I am all verklempt about this Trump thing. My maid is worried she is going to be deported.” *stop laughing this was a true conversation*

Guy 1 – “I swear I am going to murder my wife, you will not believe what she did yesterday.”
Guy 2 – “What did your sweet wife of 40 years do? She didn’t find out that you got that cigar locker at Club Macanudo did she?”
G 1 – “No that is from my discretionary fund, she purchased another pair of those expensive ass shoes that won’t fit because of her orthotics so she will wear them once they will damn near cripple her and will throw them out. I told her not to do that.”
G 2 – “Could be worse, she could have found out that you have 4 cigar lockers all over the city.”

Wife – “What time are we leaving for the summer cottage?”
Husband – “I told you that the car is picking us up this afternoon at 3 so we can be at the Wall Street Heliport by 3:30.”
Wife – “Can we go a little later, I have a hair appointment and this will rush me.”
Husband – “If we don’t leave then we will get stuck in air traffic for all those people heading to the Hamptons.” *Not sure where they have their house but I am figuring it is somewhere in Connecticut*
Wife – “I guess I can hurry, I hate it when you get like this.”

So have a good weekend because my poor ass is going to probably text my work wife and see if we can come crash her beach party on Long Island and drink some cold beer.

Meet Me by the Saturday Night Live Clock in Grand Central

A while back I was going to do a joint day with one of my fellow tour bus ticket sellers. His territority is south of mine near Grand Central Station. He told me to meet him in Grand Central Station which if you have never been before it is effin huge. I get to the station a couple minutes early and he was running late. I tell him to meet me at the SNL clock in the main terminal. Below the SNL clock is an information station for tourists. While I was standing there I overheard about a dozen question exchanges by tourists. Now for someone who has lived here for some 685ish days some of these questions were hard to give directions. Here are some examples of the questions;

  • Q – “How do I get to Scarsdale?” A – “Track 16 and the train leaves in 5 minutes”
  • Q – “Can I buy my ticket on the train?” A – “Yes but you can get a cheaper ticket over at the kiosks.”
  • Q – “How do we get to JFK and the AirTrain?” A – “You would need to take the E Subway line to JFK and transfer there?”
  • Q – “How do we get to the Statue of Liberty?” A – “You would need to take the Subway to the Staten Island Ferry?”
  • Q – “Where does President Trump Live?” A – “The White House, you need to go to Union Station to ride Amtrak.”
  • Q – “Where can I get one of those cheap knock-off Fendi Purses?” A – “Canal Street or any corner in Midtown.”
  • Q – “Those guys with the large guns hanging around the front entrance, what are they here for?” A – “Bad Guys”
  • Q – “Do you know if those hotdog vendors are serving food that is safe?” A – “If you eat one everyday for a year it may kill you but you will be ok.”
  • Q – “Do you know how to get to Chik-Fil-A on 6th Avenue?” A – “Yeah but why?”

Have a good day!

 

Happy Summer Solstice Folks – Swede 101

If you are reading this on your foam wondering what the hell I am talking about, today (Wednesday) is the Summer Solstice. This means that today is the longest day of sunlight for us folks in the Northern hemisphere. Or if you happen to know a guy who is from Sweden it means one of the most important boozy events of the year in Sweden. For today Midsummer is a day of decadent indulgence with its root in pagan rituals. 

Now stop right there, no I didn’t shed my clothes down to my birthday suit and danced naked around a Maypole, they have scruples in Park Slope Brooklyn. To give you a quick nickel tour here is what Google said about the festival in Ikea land.

Midsummer is an occasion of large gatherings − and to be honest, many Swedes take advantage of it to fulfil their social obligations so that they can enjoy the rest of their holiday in peace. In many cases, whole families gather to celebrate this traditional high-point of the summer.
Swedes like the world to be well-ordered, so Midsummer Eve is always a Friday between 19 and 25 June. People often begin the day by picking flowers and making wreaths to place on the maypole, which is a key component in the celebrations.
The maypole is raised in an open spot and traditional ring-dances ensue, to the delight of the children and some of the adults. Teenagers tend to stay out of it and wait for the evening’s more riotous entertainment.

Mrs. Trumpet and I were invited via proxy from LZ and following the Mermaid Parade we headed to the home of the Swede and SJ in Brooklyn. F the Swede welcomed us with open arms and a fruity drink as he explained to the group assembled that traditionally the Midsummer eve starts on a Friday. “If we actually did the party during the week everyone would not make it to work the next day because you normally drink until the sun comes up.” Here I am thinking to myself that I may need to visit Sweden after hearing this.

The Menu consisted of traditional Swedish fare; Meatballs, Pickled Herring, Boiled New Potatoes with fresh dill, soured cream and chives. Grilled Salmon and SJ’s native Pilipino dish of  Lumpia that was killer. The booze consisted of  Swedish Vodka and some drink with schnapps that was pretty good and gave me a great case of MPH the next day.

Ok enough about the menu and drink, what I found that was so great about this evening was the sense of pride that could be seen beaming from the host when he would describe a dish or lead the group in song. Sure, I didn’t recognize the song because it was in Swedish but you appreciate the deep appreciation of someone’s heritage. That is what makes living here so cool, you get to experience someone’s heritage and you don’t have to leave the state. We said our goodbyes and got back to our apartment where we promptly passed out but thank you to F the Swede and SJ for the hospitality.

IMG_1135Salmon and all the trimmings

IMG_1134Not much of a Herring fan but I was nice and tried a piece of it. (and spit it out in my napkin)

IMG_1133Meatballs and Potatoes

IMG_1132The table was packed with food and good times

IMG_1139Who knew that LZ could also make flower crowns? Not sure why the red onion was there but this was the flower crown workstation.

IMG_1138Mrs. Trumpet and LZ in their flower crowns. And no jackasses I wasn’t wearing one!

Again, thanks for the hospitality and next time we will do a Memphis BBQ in Park Slope!

 

 

Pictures of the Week – New York Edition

I have way too many good pictures on my iFoam not to share with the class.

IMG_1022Wait till I buy everyone on the NY East team their very own Seersucker suit. Yep even you MLP & work wife.

IMG_1026I understand this is one of the most Instagram’d exhibits next to the “fearless girl” in Lower Manhattan

IMG_0961We broke down and bought a car. We can put it in the closet of apartment when we aren’t using it.

IMG_0957Cubs win the world series last year and now the Yankees are atop the division. Albeit it is the American League but still they are rolling along.

IMG_1015Shout out to my Work Wife, LZ, MLP, UWS Girl, and any anyone else who drinks that crap blush wine. #CarbunkleCares

IMG_0976Got to love the views from the buildings near Central Park

IMG_1005Yeah try to explain this one to me please.

IMG_0996A street fair right outside our apartment door! How Cool is that!

IMG_0981Katie and Bean moved from next door to Brooklyn. Bean (springer spaniel) would come over to get a treat from us and to terrorize Maddy and Maya. They left this for us. They were good people and we will miss them. 

IMG_1032Werk is hard

IMG_1006Wee Fiona made the shopping list for Daddy. Sad thing about it is I bet 10 people on the river during BBQfest wouldn’t have caught it. 

Have a good weekend!

 

I have to come clean to my Memphis Readers

*Fade in to a large room with people sitting on folding chairs in a circle*
“Hello, my name is Carbunkle Trumpet and I am now a New York Rangers Hockey Fan.”
“Hello Carbunkle Trumpet!”

I guess I am going to have to call my mother and father and break the news to them that their first born has officially turned. I hope my dad takes it gently. I know that he had high hopes for me. My Mother, she will be devastated. For you 9 readers, this is what happens to Memphis Grizzlies fans when they get bounced from the first round of the playoffs.

Lets go back to when the Hockey bug started in me. It was back two January’s ago when I attended my first Hockey Game in MSG and it was AMAZING! Then I started to watch the games periodically when I was hanging with the boys at the Cigar Inn. This winter, I would find myself at the Cigar joint when the Rangers were on and I started to watch it out of the corner of my eye. Doc would sit in front of the big screen and would add commentary and I would pick up a couple of pointers. 

Then I started following @NYRangers on Twitter and picked up more useless information. Next thing I knew what icing was (I thought it was the stuff on a cake) and even recognized offsides. When the Grizzlies were playing the Spurs we noticed that when the Grizz were on the same night as the Rangers they both won. I even had the boys put the Grizz game on one of the smaller TV’s (if the Mets or Yankees were off) and started getting some traction on my claim of double wins.

The Grizz were eliminated and Tuesday night I was sitting at the Cigar Inn and started to realize that I was into it. I really was starting to recognize shots on goals, line changes, dirty plays and even power plays. It came to me last night when I was sitting there and even knew what time the game started,  who the Rangers were playing and who was leading the series. When Oscar Lindberg scored the second goal in the second period I yelled out in jubilation. My friend Alex was quick to bust my chops;
“Oh you are a Rangers fan now? I don’t know if I can stomach someone with a Southern accent cheering for a New York team. Knock that shit off!”

So there you go. The series is tied up and we head back to Ottawa (don’t ask me where the F that is) for Game 5. I may paint my chest this Saturday. Just make sure someone checks on my folks. They are probably grieving that their son has turned to the dark side.

IMG_0706Getting ready for Game 3

Anne-Burrell-Attending-the-New-York-Rangers-Game--03-300x420I can’t believe that I am cheering for the same team as she is. I am sure that Grainbin Girl is spitting her coffee out right now.

5rJUyyNz_400x400How sweet will it be when I text Pucci asking her “Who has the Cup?” when the Blue Shirts win Lord Stanley’s Cup but I fear that “Costa Reaper” may disown me for not cheering for his Left Coast Team.

IMG_0765I even have Fecking Gear now! This won’t bode well with my Memphis Buddies…..at all!

Memphis Parents, start paying attention to what your kids are watching. There may still be hope for them.

In the Meantime – LETS GO RANGERS!!!!!!!!

 

If you need Spices, Seasonings, Herbs, Salts, and Goo then visit Kalustyan’s Market on Lex

A while back I was with one of my cohorts selling tour bus tickets to the tourists. He is a native New Yorker and were discussing the difference between Southern and Northern food. He told me that some New Yorkers think that Southern food can be too spicy and even went so far to tell me that even some New Yorkers think that Ketchup is too spicy. (If you hail from south of the Mason Dixson line and are reading this and wondering if I am fucking with you, I promise that I am not!) He told me that he was getting into hot sauces and found a great one from Belize called Marie Sharp. My ears perked up saying that I was familiar with this brand and asked where he picked some up here in Manhattan. He gave me the address of a place on Lex at E28th Street in the Indian section of Murray Hill.

This past weekend I ventured out in the rain and cold to acquire some Marie Sharp since the bottle we got on our last trip to Belize ran out. Ironic that it was almost one year to the date but needless to say I had to get some more hot sauce. I find Kalustyan’s on Lexington and make my way into this sprawling joint. This place is probably 3 storefronts because you walk into different rooms with shelves of all kinds of different spices, seasonings, marinades, and stuff I have no idea what is in a bottle. I find the Hot Sauce section and pick up my Marie Sharp and was amazed that everything was well before the expiration date. This is a common problem I find when someone has a huge variety of Hot Sauce because they can’t get good rotation on everything.

I am standing there and one of the managers comes up to me and we start talking about the store. She tells me that they do more spice and seasoning business for restaurants here in Manhattan than anyone. They get daily shipments in from different purveyors to make sure what they have on the shelf is fresh and listen to their customers. We started talking about the Marie Sharps and she told me that it is one of their better sellers for Latin American restaurants and for Belizeans living in New York. I explain to her my history with the country and how I am always trying different things. She recommends their Spice and Herb book and shows me a couple tricks that you can do in the kitchen to create different flavors. I agree and pay cash for everything. Typical New York Establishment, you can use a card but Cash is King and you get better discounts.

IMG_0580Some of these hot sauces were pretty funny. I stuck with what I knew. Marie Sharps

IMG_0581Need Pink Salt in Bulk? The square on the right is 16X16

IMG_0583Yep, I made some Eggs the next morning and lit it up!

That was it for pictures as they Manager told me that they prefer that people don’t take pictures. I respect that but I will be back!

 

Interesting Facts about this Rock

I was reading Time Out on “The Twitter” this weekend and they had a post that I have to share with my 9 readers. If you want to see the original post you can click Here. Don’t worry I won’t take offense if you find their article better than mine. Doesn’t matter…..

Ok, so according to one of the latest US Census and Baruch College there are 8.5 Million people living in New York. If you give each New Yorker 5 square feet of space in their own crowd they would cover 42.5 Million square feet. That is 1.52 Square Miles which is a few blocks larger than Central Park.

Of the 8.5M people 52% are male and 48% are female which destroys the old adage that I always thought that there were more females in the Big Apple.  If you broke it down by race it goes like this;

  • White – 32%
  • Hispanic – 29%
  • Black – 22%
  • Asian – 14%
  • 2 or more races – 2%
  • Other  (what does this mean exactly) – .8%
  • American Indian (that is feather not dot) – .2%

If you broke it down by age and this really is puzzling to me;

  • Under 10 – 12%
  • 10 to 19 – 11%
  • 20 to 29 – 16.5% (effing Millennials)
  • 30 to 39 – 15.8%
  • 40 to 49 – 13% (hey that is me!)
  • 50 to 59 – 12.7% (hey that is Mrs. Trumpet)
  • 60 to 69 – 9.8%
  • 70 to 79 – 5.3% (guess they now live in Florida)
  • over 80 – 3.4% (tons of older people live up here as I have found)

When you walk down the street you can hear all kinds of languages. And I am not talking about a southern accent either.

  • English Language – 50.6% (I guess Irish accents count as this)
  • Spanish Language – 24.6%
  • Other Languages – 19.8%
  • Chinese Language – 5% I would think this is more

People in NYC

I think that the pictures are what gives you the best idea of all that high math.

And we aren’t even talking about the rodent problem we have here either! Hope that you aren’t claustrophobic on your next visit to NYC. 

 

That is cute and everything but when is this shit going melt?

First and foremost, My hats off to KLC Man, Nova, Farmer Ted and anyone who lives in the ‘snow belt’. I now know what you go now through from October to June. Remember back last year when New York got the 30 Inches of Snow. What you didn’t know was that right after the snowstorm my ass headed to Memphis for 2 weeks so I didn’t have to deal with the aftermath. Do you know how much of a bitch it is to move around the city with snow that is piled up on the sidewalks? Trust me, it is a pain in the ass. And you are talking about someone who only has had to endure roughly 2 major snow storms since living up here.

Tuesday we got Snowstorm ‘Stella’ and it was supposed to be a snowstorm and a Nor’easter at the same time. The city prepared for it by cancelling school on Monday, announcing that exposed subway lines would be closed and the 3 airports cancelled flights like it was nobody’s business. Monday night the snow was to start and as we were walking the dogs on their evening Pee/Poop I kept telling them “enjoy that sidewalk, the shit is about to get real’ tomorrow. Thankfully Manhattan didn’t get the 18 inches it was supposed to get but we did get 9 inches of snow and ice. Hats off to NY Sanitation because with a travel ban they were able to get the main streets cleared and New York was able to get out of ‘limp’ mode fairly quickly. By the way ‘limp’ mode in New York would have been ‘Full Fucking Stop’ in Memphis or anywhere in the south.

Now if you are reading this in Memphis or parts south of the Mason Dixon line this may not be a big deal to you but when a plow pushes snow to the side of the street it piles up. Sadly there isn’t a ‘snow fairy’ who comes in and waves its magic wand and makes it go away. This stuff packs in and is harder than a high school oil boy at a Hawaiian Tropic Swimsuit competition. You see what I am getting to here? Eventually someone with a tractor makes ‘curb cuts’ to allow pedestrians to make their way across the street. The passageway are maybe 2 feet wide if that and with all the people walking around, you get the picture. It is a pain in the ass.

I am going to show the pictures to give you an idea of what I am talking about. I assure you that this southern boy is ready for spring and summer because trudging in this crap sucks. Maria, I am now bitching about the snow and weather do I get the next New Yorker badge? I guess you need to take me to your favorite Pizza place next. Enjoy the pictures. 

IMG_0503This was on Tuesday Morning when I came down to bring the dogs out to Pee. Pay no attention to Paul’s arm on the left side of the picture. He is laughing at me because I was saying to myself “At least it isn’t rain, at least it isn’t rain!”

IMG_0504Traffic was light on First Avenue on Tuesday Morning to say the least. Notice the street, they already plowed it earlier in the morning.

IMG_0505See the path on the sidewalk? That was Manny on the John Deere Tractor/snow plow who made that to push some sidewalk snow onto the street.

IMG_0506Hard to tell but the snow by the curb is about a foot deep. This was taken about 9AM on Tuesday and we had a full 8 hours of snow and sleet after that!

IMG_0501Here is my little snow bunny about to head to work on Tuesday. She is giving me ‘the look’ because my ass was in pajama pants and was checking to see what time the cigar joint opened that afternoon.

IMG_0509This poor Bastard got stuck on the shore during the storm on Tuesday. He getting rained on and the wind was a bitch. I bet that he was late to a staff meeting so they gave him this duty.

IMG_0510Wednesday they were digging out cars and this is reason number one that I am glad that we don’t own a car here. E72nd @ 2nd Ave

IMG_0511Call the ACPCA on my ass, I don’t care. If I had to put booties on the Monkey Heads they would bite me and it would be more trouble than what it is worth. Here this is the norm with dogs.

IMG_0512Taken on E73rd as I was…..wait for it….coming back from the Cigar joint.

IMG_0514Imagine 40 people coming and going trying to walk past in this little ass path in under 15 seconds.

IMG_0513This is a great way to make sure your bike doesn’t get stolen. Bury it in snow.

IMG_0515No curb cut? This is why we wear hiking boots in New York during snow days.

IMG_0520I see one of my work cohorts on Wednesday in a shared building and he takes one look at me and says “You going to work at Texas D Brazil?” I am fine with losing cool points, at least my feet are warm compared to your frozen toes.

IMG_0522Makes it damn near impossible to Jay Walk when we have snow piles.

IMG_0524Clearing the snow on 5th Avenue. They happen to have a little parade today and the Asian Fireman, Mr. 3 First Names, AB, and Skippy don’t want snow tickling their balls as they walk up the street in their kilts.

IMG_0525Yeah your ass ain’t getting your smart car out anytime soon bud.

IMG_0499As seen on Monday when I was making 19 calls to offset being home on Tuesday. I should have asked these guys on Monday if they needed anyone to sell Tour Bus Tickets on the Beach instead of Manhattan.

I will probably post some pics this weekend from the weekend’s festivities. Happy St. Patrick’s day folks. We are going to The Yonkers St. Patrick’s Parade on Saturday with Zsquared, Enimily the International Charleston Belle, Mel the IU Fan, and DC.

 

 

Stuff we ‘used’ to think was odd -19 months living here

Yesterday marked 1 year and 7 months living here on this island called Manhattan. We celebrated it by having our favorite Russian from the UES over for Brunch and then Momma studied for her midterm this week. The time really has flown by and I would say that we are slowly becoming New Yorkers. No, my accent is still in tact and people still ask what part of Texas I am from. Mrs. Trumpet on the other hand threw out a “Are you Fucking Kidding me?” to me when I drank all of her Tea before I left for the Cigar Inn. As we look back on these 19 months I guess some things that we at first seem foreign are staring to seem normal. Now for those Memphians who have never visited up here you may have that ‘hamster wheel is spinning but nobody is home’ look as you read this list.

  1. Stoops – Forget about sitting on the front porch like you do in the south, here you are lucky if you have an outdoor space. Remember when I was jealous as crap of the Murphrank’s Roof Deck? Well sadly unless you plunk down 10+M for a UES brownstone that you still will have to renovate you have a stoop instead. Oh and forget about being protected from the rain like the porch at 595. Here you get your ass wet.
  2. Kids Playing outside – If it isn’t raining or sleeting in the winter you will always find kids playing in neighborhood playgrounds or even on city streets. I remember when I was younger and if it was below a certain temperature then Recess was held inside, not here. You will see kids playing their hearts out with rosy cheeks and frozen snot on their faces. Hey you got to tire those fuckers out because it won’t work in a less than 1K square foot apartment.
  3. Comfortable Shoes – Forget those leather soled Johnston & Murphy’s lace ups. Get you a pair of good rubber soled shoes and prepare to rotate them out. I walk roughly 10K to 15K steps a day for work. I have 3 pair of black shoes that I have in my rotation and a pair of brown for some suits that I wear. My international counterpart ‘wife’ normally is rocking a pair of flats or some pair of low heel shoes as we make our way about the city. Anything higher than 3 inches and you are crazy. *EGP – when you come for Easter, leave those 9 inch F-Me Pumps at college. Don’t worry you will turn heads w/o wearing those barbaric things.
  4. Shoe Repair Store – You got to have a great Shoe Shine/Repair “guy” in New York! I think that there may be 2 repair guys in Memphis and that was when Mr.Galtelli still had his shop on Union. Shoe shine guys in Memphis? Only one I knew about was in the lobby of the Peabody. In Gotham they are all over the place and you have to have a good one. Case in point this past Saturday. Momma’s boots were looking like crap and she needed them to get cleaned up and poste haste. I go see my buddy on 2nd Ave at Artistic Shoe Services and ‘David’ (he is Pakistani so it is easier for him to introduce himself as David) gets them shined, repaired and back to me in 2 hours. I see David each week on my way home from work on Friday’s to get my shoes cleaned up. You got to look good when you are walking the streets.
  5. Random Ish on the side of the Street – Pretty much you can furnish a house with the crap that you find on the streets of New York. Someone moves out of an apartment chances are you will find some of their furniture on the street. Let me tell you, people will fight over the good stuff. I saw a couch get dumped on W23rd street and before I could finish the Instagram post it was already nabbed.
  6. Coffee is King – Before I moved to New York I only drank coffee if it has booze it. You do some crazy hours here and need a pick me up. At first it was a diet coke or Red Bull but that really wasn’t good for me. Then I started having a double espresso after a meal. Now I am hooked on that ish! I love it Hard, Strong and Black – and that is just how I take my coffee! Maria gave me an espresso pot for my birthday and that sucker is in use all the time. Who would have thought that CBT is now a fan of the Java.
  7. How Deep Are We Going Here? – Go ahead and say it – That’s What She Said…… No I am not going there, I am referring to the depth of some of the Subway platforms. Our new Q line is pretty deep. I think at E72nd station it is 11 stories below the surface. Getting down there can be a challenge for those who don’t like heights. Mrs. Trumpet hates the escalator so we always are using the elevators which are nicer than some buildings. Just close your eyes and enjoy the ride and try not to think that there is rushing water coming down the tube instead of a train.
  8. Do you Deliver – If you think that I am going to schlep a case of wine sparkling water down the street you are crazy as hell. Yep, thank God for Fresh Direct Grocery service and Astor’s Wine and Spirits. It is a lifesaver!
  9. Wind-chill sucks – 20 degrees as a high in Manhattan? If there is no wind then it is cold but manageable. But you add the wind and then it pretty much sucks balls. Recall when I survived that Noreaster? I sure as hell do. Put it this way, when the wind starts blowing down those streets thanks to the tall ass buildings…you get the picture.
  10. Not having a car really doesn’t bug us – Nope, we don’t miss driving and messing with a car at all. Crazy huh?

stoopsSure Sarah Jessica Parker hung out on her stoop but she also drank for free b/c she put out.

img_0450Yep here in the UES we block streets so the kids can play outside. First base is the Volvo and 3rd base is the Bentley.

img_0460When they are balder than Telly Savalas then it is time to throw them out!

shoe-shineHey Guys, anybody see that naked girl run down the street? Guess not! And you don’t fool us, we know you are looking at Carbunkle’s Corny Joke of the Day on Facebook.

img_0457It did have a ‘slight’ odor from 5 feet away.

cooffeeI may have a problem with my Java intake.

img_0451Pay no attention to the Jason D. Williams portrait above the escalator down to hell!

fresh-direct-billDo you really think I am going to schlep 2 cases of drinks down the street? Yeah me too!

img_0458When you get this text message you know that it is going to be a bitch outside.

Hope that you had a good weekend and enjoyed reading. We return you to your regularly scheduled show.

 

Not sure where to put this post – TWSS

A couple of weeks back I went out for after work drinks with friends. I was tagging along and we decided to hit up a place in Hells Kitchen. I really wasn’t paying attention on how we got there but we walk in and this place was off the hook. Seriously you remember those movies where they walk into a night club and it was a former church or grand hall. Seriously all this place needed was go-go dancers on stripper poles. The music was right up my alley; The Cult “She Sells Sanctuary” welcomed us as we walked into the joint. I am going to have to ask Zsquared to bring us back there.

img_0236From the back looking to the front of the joint.

img_0237The bar, the top of the columns must be 30 feet tall.

img_0238DJ Booth where he spun some steel wheels

Seriously one of these days I am going to find the Saturday Night Fever bar on this island.