CBT in NYC

Weekends in New York can really suck ya know?

You recall when I was whining like a little bitch talking on Monday about having MPH and I was glad it was back to work? I better give you the cliff notes because if I went went blow by blow on each night then some of you may want to have an intervention. Trust me when I say that the RJ Fun-O-Meter was pegged pretty much every night.

Friday Night was the wedding and dance recital of Z(Squared) at the Boat House in Central Park. The Asian Fireman and Realtor Wife were in attendance as well as Muphranks. The Work Wife (The Managing one) was there with her Midtown Uniform wearing husband as well as a bunch of other Time Square double decker tour bus ticket sales reps. The wedding was short, to the point and everyone said yes. The food, the never emptying glasses of wine, the band, and even dancing were a great and then when the glow sticks came out……aww shit it was on like Donkey Kong!!! Many thanks to Lady Barrister for remaining awake to navigate our safe arrival to Downtown Brooklyn. I hope that Mary Louise didn’t snore too bad. Truth be told Mr. 3 First Names and I weren’t really sleeping, we were just resting our eyes. Congrats to Z(squared) on making it legal and thanks for a great party.

Hey D(squared) at AMF/HQ on Tully Street in Crime-Free New Chicago – call me this week. I saw a really cool thing at this party that you may want to consider it for your next Thanksgiving Wedding. #RoboCares

Saturday day was spent relaxing and celebrating Mary Louie’s anniversary of circling the sun. That evening we attended the Losers Lounge rendition of Barry Manilow & Bette Midler. I learned something very important about this show. Apologies to my homosexual readers but I found out that I really don’t like the music of Barry Manilow. I mean other than Copacabana his stuff is just crap. Here is where I am going to further upset you more – any rendition of Bette Midler and the movie “Beaches” really needs to Fucking Stop also.

Sunday was spent yet again with a music theme and as luck would have it we got to hang with Vivian Longstreet and Della Forte again. We saw them Saturday night and then when we arrived at the Barclays for Phil Collins they were also in the same suite we were in. Phil Collins was great and his voice is the same and even though he was recuperating from back surgery which slowed him down a bit his 17 year old son played the Drums. Great Show and we were glad that we decided to attend the show.

IMG_4467Yep, we are in Black Tie heading to the event stuck in traffic

IMG_4469I am so glad that Mr. 3 First Names, Asian Fireman and I sat down at someone else’s table because the amount of glassware full of booze is really appalling. We all drank mineral water that night.

IMG_4473You can always tell a good night out by what you purchase the next day for lunch. Work Wife (Managing One) got World Famous Halal guys on Saturday. We opted for $50 worth of greasy Mexican Food and a nap.

IMG_4477Pregame dinner and drinks before Losers Lounge

IMG_4482Anna Copacabana singing what else? Copacabana and it was great.

Image-1Yes that was Phil singing “In the Air Tonight” after the drum solo! Boom!

IMG_4500Whole Band Killing It. If you can see a show I highly encourage you to go see him.

Like I said it really was a shitty weekend in New York. I hope that we get to do it again.

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Pics of the Week

Been a fun and busy week. Here are some pics that didn’t make this weeks blog posts.

IMG_4394I had to file a complaint because I didn’t see Sophie or Bryan on this aisle.

IMG_4390Here is a view of the Empire State from the West Side

IMG_4375Get off my TV Kanye. You are embarrassing yourself.

IMG_4363Maya about half way on Saturday while walking all over Dumbo.

IMG_4357Yes D(Dog) I got you and RLynn I am getting some bread products for your sorority sisters

IMG_4356That cat was really judging me on Friday

IMG_4352I guess my David Byrne Concert shirt does resemble a Circle Jerk. Still a killer show.

IMG_4301The Murphranks’ liver did a flip when I snapped this picture. I am about 50 feet from their front door. But I was heading to smoke a cigar.

WPS and Go to HELL BAMA!

Billy Joel Again? Number 102 in the Garden

No it wasn’t us muttering that sacrilege. I am not going to call out the person who said that (while drinking many glasses of wine, I might add) but this past Sunday when we got a chance to catch “The MSG House Band” we said “YES!” Now do you recall when we caught his act back in March of 2016? I can assure that you that William Martin Joel didn’t disappoint us at all for Show number 102. Think about it, the man has played 56 consecutive sell outs and he keeps saying that he will keep doing it as long as people still keep coming to the shows. Billy plays promptly at 8PM and he played for about 3 hours and didn’t disappoint at all. I do have a great video of the crowd singing “Piano Man” if you want it let me know and I can send it to you. Mary Louise is killing the rendition by the way!

Image-1

Boss Lady/Momma was very happy that he played “Only The Good” as it is one of her favorite songs. Me I am partial to “Italian Restaurant” and “New York State of Mind”.

IMG_4379He loves playing here and isn’t afraid to bust chops either. “I burned my hand with some coffee but this is New York so here I am!”

IMG_4380The band has been with him for a while. He even brought out a Guitar Tech to sing some AC/DC. Seriously how cool is it to work for someone who says “Hey, we are going to let you sing a song in the Worlds Most Famous Arena!”

IMG_4387Thankfully Kanye didn’t come out dressed as a Perrier bottle. Billy isn’t a fan of ‘that guy’

IMG_4386And all this shit was down and tucked away in 3 hours. Not bad work if you can get it.

And for those of you wondering if I am going to have another Sunday Funday concert I am not. I will be returning from a weekend trip so there won’t be any Instagram/SnapChat concerts on Sunday. Some of you are very nice and only called me a “Mother Fucker” twice.

An Evening With David Byrne

Back in May when we were in the throws of our move to Brooklyn with WAY too much shit I recall seeing the two above tweets. AB is a professional concert goer and has seen many a good show. For her to make this revelation, well my interest was peaked. Now when I saw a similar tweet about the same show from JS, oh this got my full attention. Later in the day and I can’t recall who said it on Twitter but the comment “Top 5 Concert” was mentioned about the same show. Now that is a ballsy statement folks, you don’t normally have that strong of a review that many times about an outdoor Music Festival. Needless to say, I was on my iPhone googling his tour and found out that he would be playing in Brooklyn in mid September so I made note of it.

Mary Louise informed me about 6 weeks prior to show that she would be heading to Japan following our trip to St. Louis and wouldn’t be able to attend. I was bummed, I really wanted to see this show. A couple of days prior to our leaving for the weekend I was on the subway heading home listening to Pandora (how it works w/o not being hooked to internet the whole time, I don’t know) and a Talking Heads song came on. It was a sign so I texted The UES Russian and asked her if she would like to go to the show on a Monday. I booked the tickets, paid a kings ransom for the tickets but what the hell. You can’t take with you and when in doubt – You Buy The Fucking Concert Tickets!

Now here is where AB & JS are probably going to agree with me. There are really no proper words on how to explain the show to someone who hasn’t seen it. I know that is a Bullshit comment but I really can’t describe; The Energy, The Passion, The Strange, and The Music that went on this past Monday Night. They did have 2 hour 21 songs setlist as compared to BSMF but the energy that a 66 year old man puts into this show was unbelievable. Oh and they started this back in March and it is going to be a long tour too. David Byrne is a consummate artist and performer. After seeing this show on Monday night, Yes AB & JS – I agree with you 100% on your tweets.

Folks – If you missed it in Memphis, NOLA or all parts south, please pick out a city on the tour and go see it. Now I have failed to mention that the Kings Theater in East Flatbush is an unbelievable venue to see it. To explain it to my Memphians, think Orpheum but on Steroids. To see David Byrne in the Kings Theater – It was a Top 5 Concert Experience. Yep I went there too!

IMG_4277Opening the show with “Here”

IMG_4278Not a lot of fancy set creations here folks. It is just Music, Passion, and Energy being put on this stage.

IMG_4280This is what I was really impressed about this show was that all the music being produced on that stage came from the instruments that the band were carrying around. No sitting behind a 21pc drum set or keyboard for the Band. They carried their shit around and put on a choreographed show.

IMG_4281I am still in awe of this concert

IMG_4282I think we have a little bit of Elvis here with the drop light.

Thanks to the UES Russian for being my date and if you caught the show too I bet you can agree with me that David Byrne gets better with age.

Lay off Fuckers! I have been busy!

Welcome to another Sunday Evening post from Carbunkle Trumpet/Paul Allen where he may (or may not) have been enjoying some Sunday Funday while he was compiling this.  Anyway I have still have a couple posts brewing and I will do better this week but here are some pics I have that I can share with you;

moments_08_03_18_03_32These are the faces of people who were tormenting me last week. I will get you all back, I promise.

IMG_3950Booze may or may not have been drank at this joint this week. TQ you were missed. Next time!

IMG_3933Note to Self – NEVER EVER EVER FUCKING PISS OFF NOVA! Seriously this is some funny shit and I will wear it on occasion up here in Liberal New York!

IMG_3948Yes I posted the same pic again from the Featured Picture! Congrats to my Bar Wife on getting gainful employment up here in the North East! I can’t wait to hear her bitch about the winters up here. She doesn’t know what she is in for up here.

And yes folks it is Elvis Week! *EP gets his own billing*

IMG_3946Always impressive

IMG_3902Again I am not on a Fucking BBQ Team! By the way to my 21 readers – please tune into the Food Network on Tuesday night for the BBQ Edition of Chopped. I happen to know “A Guy” on that show!

IMG_3928These two may be the reason that I didn’t post much last week. Love them both to death but never get into a Vodka Drinking contest with them. Nobody will win!

Have a good week and I promise I will do better this week.

 

CBT!

Strike up the Band We have lived on these Rocks for 3 years!

Wow! Another Year has come to pass and yet here I am still banging away on this laptop. I celebrate this milestone because I haven’t gotten hit by that crosstown bus or fallen ass over teacup down a bilco door. Sadly, I celebrate this 3rd birthday solo while right now Mary Louise is heading on a Ferry to another island down in Mexico with the MoHo’s. No I am not bitter about this one bit. I promise.

In her absence I have been writing this post in my head for a couple of days and I  have to say how humble I am that we are still plugging along in a city that could possibly eat us alive. I have always said that there are two things here in The Empire State that I always run out of; time and money. This year has been a whirlwind and I can’t believe it has been 3 years from when we rolled up to 1300 First Avenue and emptied our contents into the UES. This year there have been some major changes to our lives this year and l have always said that sometimes change is good.

In the past year some of our friends have also followed suit and made moves from familiar Memphis surroundings and dipped their toe into new cities and regions. I always tell them from our experiences that right now there may be tears of uncertainty but each day and week things will normalize and level out. I still look back and say to myself that if you told me 3 years and change that I would be living in New York and love each day of it I would have told you that you are crazy as hell. I am serious when I say that this was the best thing that we have done in our adult lives. The experiences and things that we have and continue to learn about have been amazing. Much like Anthony Bourdain told us on each show was that we need to explore and try out new things. Do the uncomfortable and you will be amazed at to what you learn and it will make you a richer person internally. I still miss that fucker. His story wasn’t finished.

People still ask me how I like living here I always tell them the same response. We love it and should have done this sooner. I am in no way dogging Memphis or our friends back there but Mary Louise and I always had an ‘explorer’ gene in us that was dying to get out. New York is a strange city and has a lot of people from many different walks of life. Much like a child we are always asking questions and seeking information. You know what we found out. They may be from a different country, have a different person that believe in or vote for but we are all children playing in the same sandbox and we better find a way to get along. Call me crazy but the first thing that I ask the yellow cab driver, after I tell them *in my best New York Accent*, is where they are from and “Tell me about yourself.” People love telling their story to strangers. There is a lot of pride in those words and I cherish each and every one.

While I sit here smoking a Perdomo stinking up my work laptop I recall all the things we did. They are in no particular order include;

  • Mary Louise completes and graduates with a MBA from NYU and this better complete her higher education quest. We don’t have any fucking room in closet for a Doctoral Robe and all that crap. (I am very proud of her for this)
  • Mary Louise takes a new job and a whole bunch of new responsibilities that I don’t doubt she will do great in.
  • Made a trip to Philly and got me an authentic Cheesesteak.
  • We moved from the Upper East Side to the Gritty Hipster streets of Downtown Brooklyn. That wasn’t easy folks, oh and moving sucks here in New York City.
  • One would think that downsizing from 1300 square feet to 535 square feet would be easy but try to move to another studio that is configured differently. Thankfully Ba made a trip to Brooklyn and helped us with the move.
  • I made Senior at my work so I am now a Senior Sales Rep for selling tourists tickets on those double decker buses.
  • We made a trip to Maine for Lobster.
  • We made a trip to the Riviera Maya of Mexico for a work counterparts wedding and made a one night trip over to Isla Mujeres in December.
  • Made a trip back home for Christmas and got to see our friends and family.
  • Had to check in on Kitty down in Belize in February and to get warmed up from the 4 Nor’easters we had this past winter.
  • Were honored to become Godparents for Willimena in April and now have another one who will possibly wipe our asses when we get older.
  • Reconnected with Vivian Longstreet and Stone and enjoyed a great weekend with them Upstate.
  • Had to make yet another trip to Mexico and insure that RJ and Mallory didn’t have tres children. (still unknown but we will see in 9 months if that was a success)
  • Mary Louise made a trip to The Hamptons while I smoked meat on Katonah Avenue in the Bronx.
  • Mary Louise currently is down in Mexico right now with the MoHo’s and will return on Monday.

Yep we had a blast on this island and on a couple other islands. Rather than collect stuff we have decided to collect memories and passport stamps. I am nearing 1000 words and will end with a quote that I always love. “Travel is the only thing that you buy that makes you richer”

IMG_2489Much like Black Eyed Peas and Greens on New Years day if you celebrate New Years eve wearing a Bowler hat you will have good luck. *taken 2 blocks from Times Square on NYE

IMG_1883New York Food and Wine Festival Event

IMG_1641Pipes and Drums Prom. Who knew that Mary Louise and Lady Barrister wore the same color dress.

IMG_0059Madison Square Garden Event – here Mary Louise is saying “W.T.C.B.F. Carbunkle Trumpet, LZ goes to all the good shows and you take my ass to a Collegiate Hockey match? You better step up your game and start bogarting the good tickets too!”

IMG_2151Funny I don’t hear her bitching about this one. Aboard the USS Intrepid for the Marine Corp’s Birthday Celebration

IMG_3427Willimena is going to be a handful I can already tell.

IMG_4024 (1)Who has 2 thumbs and completes her MBA from NYU in 2 years while working full time and interviews for a new job. This one! Seriously though. This is it for higher level education.

IMG_2821Right before we move out of the UES they open a bonafide Queso Mexican Restaurant Joint and we find a great Cajun place too! Thank God we have the Q Train!

IMG_3128Boerum Hill is pretty cool. If you walk across the street from our joint you are in Boerum Hill neighborhood. If you make a left and walk across Flatbush you are in Fort Greene. You walk 3 more blocks and you are in Park Slope. Confused yet?

IMG_1262So glad to see Kitty when she made a trip up to the Big Apple.

IMG_0501This is the face of a woman who is about to walk out into a friggin Northeast Nor’easter. 50 MPH Winds with below windchill temps and Snow. I ‘worked from home’ that day!

IMG_8491And here was the first pic when we moved in. 3 years later and we are still here and I may or may not be a liberal democrat.

Thanks for reading and for following this worthless dribble. Now pull that band-aid off and go out and make yourself richer and happy 3rd Anniversary to us!

Pictures of the Week

So the dogs are getting tired of me and we still have 4 more days till Mary Louise gets back from her “work” trips. I know that she will be glad to be back home and I have done a lot of chores this week getting the house ready for her arrival. Do you know how hard it is to clean a studio? Regardless, I plan on doing another post about enjoying Robopalooza but that is for another day. Here are some pictures that I didn’t post from Mexico and the past weeks.

IMG_4080Geranium approved this picture for me to post. She really hated Isla as you can tell.

IMG_3886Thanks to EGP and EGP’s Mom for the Shirt. I wore it the other day and forgot to snap a pic of me wearing it.

IMG_3883Forgot to snap a pic of the new Cole Slaw Dressing/Marinade

IMG_3870When the (Domestic) Work Wife’s midtown uniform vest wearing husband leaves his iFoam in the bathroom it gets a thorough cleaning, scrubbing, sterilizing and disinfecting.

IMG_3869If she had a Haz-Mat suit she would have worn it. Thankfully I had some gloves that I gave her. #Robocares

IMG_383038 years ago a movie about “a Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac… It’s in the hole! It’s in the hole! It’s in the hole!” Came Out. And FRIGGIN LZ NEVER SAW IT! Guess what you are getting for your wedding LZ……

IMG_3824JP moves away from 501 and Ginger’s on 7th Ave closes. The Mighty Flynn (just coined that btw) leaves Leroy Street and then this joint closes. I am afraid if SP moves on then Down the Hatch will close.

IMG_3820You should always look over your shoulder when traveling abroad. You never know who you will run into. Yep going Left to Right we have – New York, New Orleans, New York, Memphis, and Memphis. So great to see the old Memphis Mafia.

IMG_3810Monkey Head Maddy is starting to resemble a predecessor Tiny Toy Poodle that my parents had by the name of Gigi. She loved sleeping in-front of the Refrigerator. Of course back in the day that Avocado side by side had an exhaust at the bottom that kept Gigi warm. Maddy is just lazy and lays out wherever she wants to.

IMG_3721Hey Work Wife – Down in Front!

IMG_3841Don’t feed the PorkOsaurus Web Master

IMG_3772I really am going to be pissed if Mary Louise Geranium and The Mo-Ho’s visit Isla Mujeres on Sunday. And if they get Breakfast Pizza and have Oscars…..

IMG_3758This place is what I think about every Sunday for now on. Just relaxing at the public beach with the island kids and families as I drink my weight in beer and listen to great music.

By the way – I may be posting a special Post on Sunday as it our anniversary of living here in New York.

Pictures from the Week(s)

Got a bunch of pics on the ole Camera roll that aren’t all shitty firework pictures so I will share with you today. Taking next week off because I am going to be busy making sure that the parents of Mary Louise and my (if I conjugated that wrong kiss my ass, I am typing this at 2AM because I can’t sleep) godchild don’t drink any tainted water on the fun side of the border wall. Oh I am sure that I will probably upload one or two pics next week. Anyhoo have a good weekend and keep cool.

IMG_3646We have now arrived at Swamp Ass Temps in the Subway. What you don’t see or smell is the sweat pooling in my shoe or the faint smell of GoldBond

IMG_3670Shout out to Baker Street Pub who was nice enough to put on the Summer League game for us last week. And Happy Birthday to our favorite slinger of Bud Light!

IMG_3586My Favorite Greek Restaurant has a really cool display of prayer beads in their front lobby that I just noticed.

IMG_3584That right there is old Skool Midtown Uniform or the Frank H Sweater Vest! Oh and the temps that day were well into the “Feels like 100”! What the Corn Bread Feck Pops!

IMG_3562Shout out to Shannon O’ L as I saw this shirt and thought of her.

IMG_3653When in Hipster Brooklyn…… Note the prices on the 2X4’s and half case too

IMG_3567I do love living here because I see stuff here that reminds me of living in Memphis. I mean who didn’t see this on Summer Avenue or on Stage Road atop the hill in Rocking Raleigh?

IMG_3566Mary Louise Geranium, MAP is very excited to just read smut books next weekend in Mexico. I am proud of her but will still divorce her ass if she goes to be a Damned Doctor. *editor’s note – that cheap ass University couldn’t spring for a sheepskin holder?*

Have a good weekend folks and hug each other!

Ring Side Seats for 4th of July Fireworks

One of the main perks of living here on the 38th floor of Downtown Brooklyn overlooking Manhattan is the view of the East River. Two years ago we went to Schroder’s house to watch the 4th of July Fireworks with killer views. This year we decided to stay in and see if Maria and Bill wanted to come over and to watch the fireworks. They were in so a trip to Popeye’s Chicken was in order.

Unfortunately the fireworks this year were delayed due to the shows and rather than a 45 minute show (7 barges on the East River at 5K a minute) they only had a 30 minute show. We did enjoy the show but even more enjoyed the fact that we had air-conditioning, a fully functioning bathroom and cold drinks. That to me was the best part of the fireworks. Needless to say we are thrilled with our views and that the building that is being built which would possibly block our view stopped off at 32 floors. Win Win for us.

IMG_3661All the FDNY Fireboats were out in full force before the show.

IMG_3660They kept the boat traffic North of the Manhattan Bridge

IMG_3663Wonder what color the Empire State that night – Red, White, Blue of course

IMG_3664I suck at Firework pictures

IMG_3666Like I said, I suck at taking these pictures.

A good time was had on a Wednesday night even though we had to go back to work on Thursday.

 

 

Emma Stone, Billy Jean King, and Paul McCartney walk into a bar.

Actually they walk into Alan Cumming’s bar, Club Cummings. This is a true story according to the bar owner who we went to see on Saturday night with Maria and Bill. His show “Legal Alien” is a mash up of songs, funny stories but he only down side of the show was that it was at friggin midnight! Seriously don’t you entertainers realize that we us old folks have to be in bed by then? Anyway Alan Cumming is a riot and gave us his outtake on certain issues that the crowd all agreed upon.

IMG_3533Joe’s Pub sure is proud of its Vodka.

IMG_3534I guess I need to start selling more Tickets to the Double Decker Bus tours on Monday.

IMG_3538He puts on a great show

IMG_3543Lace Sleeveless Shirt – No it doesn’t make you look Gay.

Hope you had a good weekend. We sure did!