So are you Tiger Nation fans getting excited yet? I have to say that the city does get a little bit of a special charge during the holidays. The Rockefeller tree will be covered in Scaffolding because they have to get it ready for the official lighting ceremony in early December. Not to worry there are tons of other stuff already up to get pictures taken for those Christmas Cards. G(Squared), I saw that they were putting lights on those chicken feet down in Chinatown. I did see a Miller Light Truck on Canal Street so you should be good to go.
Previously we spoke about some of the tips for you visitors, here are the second half of them. But this list will be fun stuff. So without further adeau;
Underground is the best way to get around the city – They deliver 1.5 million packages in the city of Manhattan a day. Add to that Yellow Taxis, Ubers, Tour Buses and the city gets a tad…..gridlocked. They once timed a car going from 1st Ave Crosstown to 12 Ave and it took almost 52 minutes. That being said using the subway is your best friend. Again use Google Maps. Those maps they have in the subway stations are good but do you know which lines are not running on the weekend? If you use Google Maps and The Pigeon App and you will have a ease free commute. I say get Metro Card and put 20.00 on it and then refill it when necessary.
Subway 101 Hints – Take off your backpack and go to the center of the cab if it is packed. Let the elderly and pregnant women sit down. If you see a subway car that is empty when others are packed it is empty for a reason. Trust me you can’t hold your breath between subway stops so don’t go there. Oh when you are leaving the subway area and see someone standing there sliding his hand like he has a credit card through his other hand do them a solid. Swipe them in the Subway on your card. Pay it forward.
Staying in an Air BnB? – Download the Fresh Direct App and have your beer, wine, bottled water, snacks and drunk munchies food delivered to your door. I say order your stuff the day before you arrive and you can schedule your delivery day and time. You will have to be there when the stuff is delivered but trust me schleping (that is Yiddish for carrying) groceries to your apartment sucks.
Speaking of Apps download the Seamless app. This is 24 hour room service for the area restaurants. It is New York’s version of Uber Eats and it kicks ass. Bagel delivery guys are the best. Make sure you tip them cash. Another App you need is the Pigeon app. It is Waze but for New York Subways and gives you real-time delays and issues.
Cost of Beers and Food – Now brace yourself you Max’s Sports Bar regulars the cost of beer isn’t going to be the same as in 38103. I don’t want to hear it, I have been here for 4 years and have accepted paying north of $5.00 for Bud Light and $8.50 for Titos and soda. Are there cheaper places? Sure there are but here is my suggestion. Sit at the bar, be nice, be respectful and maybe the bartender may give you a “Buy Back” where they give you a drink on the house. Also it wouldn’t be a bad idea to stash a couple C-notes in your wallet. A lot of Brooklyn bars are Cash Only. Those are pretty easy as you just leave your money on the counter and the bartender will take the funds needed for drinks out of your pot. Trust me, they aren’t going to screw you.
Bars and places to eat around The Barclays’ Center – plenty of great places on 5th Avenue to grab some food and drink before and after the game. In the interest of some of those establishments that I frequent on 5th Avenue I am not going to name them here. You are also just steps away from the Subway station and can get into Manhattan fairly quickly.
Sightseeing in the City – Want to see the Bitch in the Harbor? Jump on the Staten Island Ferry (it is free) and you will boat right by it to take a picture. The also sell beer on board (ANG MT just saw that and it peaked his interest) and you get to see that 5th borough that Mr. 3 First Names despises. When you are down in Fidi swing by the Stock Exchange, Bull, Fearless Girl, Hamilton’s grave. Then walk over to the footprints at the 9/11 memorial.
Food Places you have to have – First off there is no good Memphis BBQ here in New York. Don’t try it, you are wasting your time and money. I equate it to trying to find a NYC bagel in Memphis. It ain’t happening. Do your homework and try to eat a couple slices at the Best that NYC has to offer. Want to eat at Katz’s or one of the big named places – be first on line when they open. Swing by the south east corner of Avenue of Americas and W53th for some World Famous Halal Guys. Go easy on the White Sauce and get extra napkins. Again – Get Reservations NOW!
Food Suggestions – People always ask me this and believe it or not I am just as unfamiliar with places as you are. I have heard you can eat Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner at a different place for each meal for a year and not have a repeat. My normal saying is that if it is still in business then they must be doing something right. The margin of error for restaurants is so very tight and if you have a bad showing you are done. I also use Zagats, Yelp and Google Searches for the best places. If you want a Dive Bar list let me know. I have a killer one!
Clothing and Shoes – I get it, you ladies want to look good in your wedges and or heels but who are you kidding. It is going to be cold and possibly will rain. Comfort is your key and make sure that you have good shoes because you will be walking a ton! Regarding the George Costanza Puffy Coat, you can bring it but with going in and out of places, the subway you may want to layer and wear a scarf. If you plan on going to the Parade bring everything but your kitchen sink. Also the winds up here can be a bitch. My wool top coat is great about half of the time but if we are to have snow or a light rain I am breaking out my North Face coat. Bring a hat too!
Shopping – I use Amazon and order eCommerce so you are on your own. I do recommend that you check out Century 21 downtown. They have some good stuff.
Enjoy your time in New York and Brooklyn, be nice to people, support local, tip your bartenders and stay safe. We leave out on Turkey Day for the weekend but give me a shout if you are in town early.
Leaving on a big metal plane tomorrow for 17.9214° N, 87.9611° W to drink with a couple friends. I have been waiting for Otter’s 50th birthday for like 2 years and its finally here. How fucked up is that. I am celebrating the anniversary of someone who now has to get a colonoscopy. Oh well it could be worse. It could be my 50th Birthday. Can’t wait to see some old friends this weekend too!
Anyway have a good week and weekend and try to stay warm you New Yorkers. I hear that it is going to be kinda chilly this weekend.
A while back the Fab 5 (Baby Fine Hair, OTB, Dance With Me, Geranium and Not B) were talking about doing a trip to Charleston. They invited Weed (even though she was in a much younger class) and at some point and time the Fab 5 + Weed decided that spouses would be welcome also. Since Geranium was on a work trip once again I flew solo to Charleston. We rented an Air BnB downtown and flew in on Friday night.
I won’t bore you with details (Pretty much all we did was drink and eat) but I have to be honest. I really enjoyed Charleston. If you have a chance get there. They have tons of bars and neat food joints.
Like I said, it was a good trip and we had some fun down there. I later found out that Charleston was the town that Bourdain ate at the Waffle House.
If you have not seen the movie “Seven” I won’t spoil the fun. One of the many things that I have been trying to do is support the arts. When we moved up here we joined The Met for a year. Since then we kind of became homebodies but I have always been trying to do something.
The YMCA up on 92nd street in the UES had been doing a long lecture series that I have been keeping my eye on. Some were sold out before I could even buy tickets but when I noticed that Gwyneth Paltrow would be interviewing Evan Funke I circled the date on the calendar. Ok Truth – I have always had a little thing for her. I mean if you aren’t a fan of The Royal Tenenbaums then we can’t be friends.
Anyway if you are not a foodie you won’t recognize that Evan Funke is well known chef having worked at Spago and is a Pasta Making God in the restaurant world. The talk was great and many thanks to the Russian for being my date since Geranium was out of town.
Robert De Niro is on the 7th of October. Hey UWS you want to be my +1? Geranium is going to be out of town again.
So I started putting notes together for the Blog post on our trip to Dale Hollow. I haven’t published it yet because I want to have my proofreader Kitty put some eyes on it before I publish. Problem is that Kitty is in Belize and she is busy down there.
Anyway here are some pictures from this week and weeks past. Have a good weekend and stay cool Memphis folks. I hear it is hotter than 2 rats fucking in a wool sock down there.
Have a good weekend folks and I will work on the other posts.
Happy Monday Folks! And don’t let your eyes fool you. You are actually reading a past weekend post on a Monday. Like I said last week, Geranium is away all week and I got left alone on Sunday afternoon. Also The Murphranks were out of town so instead of having some Sunday Funday I worked on this worthless Dribble.
This past Friday Vivian coordinated a field trip on the Circle Line Boat Tour for the WFUV Disco Boat Cruise. Or as My (former) Work Wife (The Domestic One) said to me; “Oh you are on a booze cruise.” This past Friday we had bonus because not only was it a Friday the 13th but it also was a Harvest Moon. Let me tell you. Seeing a full Moon on the Hudson and East River….it Fucking Rocked.
Now while we were snapping pictures I couldn’t help but notice how sharp and clear the pictures on Della Forte’s Samsung foam. I realized right then that I would ask her to send me some pictures so I promptly put my phone away and decided to drink cold beer instead.
Here are some great pictures from Friday Night.
Have a good week and be nice to each other. Except for Brett Kavanaugh. He is a rapist and should be put in shackles. Debate me on this. I dare you.
We have all seen that episode. The one where Kramer and Newman devise a plan to make it rich by returning all the cans and bottles to Michigan. They are doing this because Michigan has a higher deposit refund than New York. Logistically it can’t work unless they ‘borrow’ a mail truck. You folks in the south, I don’t even know if they do this anymore. Do they?
So while we were at Dale Hollow Lake in between our juice cleanses I was having a discussion with Ralph, the owner of the Mobile home community. In addition to great conversation about Men’s colognes from the late 80’s I inquired about the recycling effort here at Star Point on Dale Hollow Lake. You see at Dale Hollow Lake I didn’t see any recycle bins or paper bins. Do you recall my post when I got back fromSwitzerland about recycling? Anyway before you start labeling me the Liberal Granola Hipster, I do have a point.
Ralph informed me that they have kids at the Marina who will sort the trash and get the recycle cans to turn them in for a charity. This confirms the point that no money can be made by recycling and it confirms Kramer’s point. Meanwhile “Ralph” and I were enjoying a yummy Kale and Captain and he inquired about the recycling effort here in New York. I inform him that the “Can People” handle that and actually it makes the Trash Pick Up really a breeze.
So here is the deal. In New York our recycle specifically the cans and bottles are handled by what I call is the Can Mafia/People. You see our Recycle/Trash/Dumpster is put on the street during certain times of the week. Naturally, I am not around during this time but I have seen the can sorting happen in different parts of the city. So in Brooklyn at our building the Can People (Primary people of Asian Descent) show up and sort the bags to pull out cans and bottles. No big deal right? Well then a big arse truck shows up and they load them into the truck and by God this is a fucking Network. These folks are better organized than the Eye-Talians. Oh and you better not encroach on ones’ turf. I have seen this. It isn’t pretty.
We got a damn Can Network Going on here in New York!
Sometimes it is good to be Carbunkle Trumpet. Oh and sometimes it is even better to be sitting in Baller seats for a Yankees/Red Sox home series on Friday night. Needless to say it is a helluva good perk of working for the Double Decker Tour Bus Company. Oh and for the Yankees to win too? What can I say? I am money!
Feel Free To Hate. I even hate myself for sitting in these seats since I am not such a huge Yankees Fan. But I will still live with myself. Oh and I am 1-0 sitting in these seats and the Yankees swept the Red Sox on this series.
I just like it. It makes me happy and I also know that Memphis is probably going to be in a heat advisory since it is Dead Elvis Week. Did you know that I can also forecast the Memphis weather?
Coldest Day of the Year in Memphis – Whatever day they play the Liberty Bowl Game
Hottest Day of the Year in Memphis – Around Dead Elvis Week
Rainiest Day/Week of the Year in Memphis – Beale Street Musicfest or World Championship BBQ Cooking Contest.
I mean if you know the past, you can predict the future.
I am going to share with you some pictures I snapped this past Sunday from the Murphranks Rooftop. Bobcat & Professor were there along with Rocky and Monkey Head Maya. Sorry folks but No pictures of the Humans – I mean have you ever seen Meg or Bobcat in the same place? Same goes for Matt or the Professor? Come to think of it, I haven’t seen Geranium for the past 24 hours. I bet she is in Seattle again.
Tomorrow I take the gloves off and blast expedia for their shitty customer service.