You recall the Bourdain show called “The Layover?” This post is nothing like that.
So Ba (that would be my mother) celebrated 70 trips around the sun back in December. Ba decided that she would celebrate her party in 2020 as there was a bunch of stuff going on this past December. It was decided that they would do a joint party and have it in late February.
That was great in theory but we had already committed on attending family Christmas up in Northwest Arkansas the week of Valentines day. We explained to Ba that we could only make one event and we agreed to meeting at family Christmas. Ba sent us the invite to the party and it sat on our table for a couple of days. We decided that we would try to make a trip down for the party by rolling that Non-Rev dice and get in and out flying stand by.
Long story short, we got in town Saturday late afternoon, went to the party, went to bed, flew back to New York some 17 hours later after arrival. Now you may be wondering what was the big deal and why didn’t we stay later or longer. You see Geranium was in the middle of a in town/out town trip and we agreed that we would make this trip brief as possible. Also and one of the tricks to flying non-rev standby is that you have to take those early/late flights that nobody likes to fly unless they have to.
Anyway here are some pics and don’t get your noses our of joint Memphis folks. We will be back, we promise.
Like I said, it was a little painful but you only circle the sun 70 times and you have party to celebrate it.
Or as my friend SDS would say about February 14th. “Today is the only day that girls can dot their i’s with little hearts.” Anyway Happy VD to those of you who are standing on line for chocolates or flowers. Next to the rear entrance to our building is a European Wax salon. I wondered why that place was packed Thursday night.
Me I am waiting on Geranium to land so we can go have that fancy dinner at Eleven Madison Park. Anyway here are some pictures from the past couple of weeks.
As you can see from the featured pictured that on the 18th of December I get an email from RJ saying that the gauntlet has been thrown. I confer with Geranium on her schedule and within 5 minutes of getting that email we are informing our favorite travel agent that we can’t be one-upped by RJ and Mal-O-Rie and to book us the same time down in Mexico.
I realize that the weekend we will be down in Mexico will also be the Super Bowl. I already knew by mid October that the Jets and Giants were out so I was ok watching a sporting event from another country. I was in London the previous Super Bowl and I didn’t really miss much. We stayed at a brand new resort and had a blast. Of course we don’t have to have much (except for a shitload of Wine and Vodka) to have a good time with the 4 of us.
We had great weather, the game was actually fun and it was good to get away from Memphis and New York for a couple days.
So who will you be emailing with 45 days notice to come to a foreign country and drink with them?
On the back of the door in our apartment we have one of those old school calendars. We use it for scheduling shit and to make sure that we keep the dog alive with our schedules. I took a look at it this morning as I was getting the Black Eyed Peas and Greens on the stove and here is what we had to show for with Trips;
Geranium was away 151 days in 2019. Mind you 31 of those days were when she was in Switzerland/France. That actually made us both appreciate our time together more and take stock in our relationship which made it stronger.
We saw Elton John and his Farewell Tour at The Barclays
Got to experience The Rock And Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony. That was a killer event.
While Geranium was away Mr. 3 First Names & Lady Lawyer and I went to see Jose Andres at his book signing.
Got our Southern Redneck on thanks to BK and saw Hank Jr and Skynrd at Forrest Hills.
Rang in the New Year at the Barclays Center with The Strokes.
Oh and we had dinner at Per Se too.
And so that I am not a complete prick I am going to end this list that we also did some horse gambling at Aquaduct Race Track.
Regarding Trips Away, I am kind of embarrassed to divulge this to you dozen readers. I mean this list is somewhat obscene. Mind you we were able to take advantage of Geranium’s international trips and my ability to fly stand by.
Hung with PNG Mike, Ellie & JD in London and watched 6 Nations Rugby with them.
Visited Northwest Arkansas for Family Christmas
Made a trip Upstate with Vivian and Stone
Made warm weather trips to; Cancun, Belize, Fort Meyers, Gulf Shores, and Dale Hollow Lake.
Went over to Philly for a BBQ at Pepe’s house.
Got to experience Barcelona for the First Time. (Got to go back)
I did 48 hours in Switzerland to see Geranium and imagine that..it was raining!
Made it to Memphis for Thanksgiving and for a work trip in September.
Got to eat some low country cooking with the ChoHo’s in Charleston South Carolina.
All in all it was a good year for us for doing the fun shit. Granted I wondered why our bank account has been low but now I know why I haven’t been able to see my feet in months.
It was a good time for trips and shit that we saw in 2019.
A while back the Fab 5 (Baby Fine Hair, OTB, Dance With Me, Geranium and Not B) were talking about doing a trip to Charleston. They invited Weed (even though she was in a much younger class) and at some point and time the Fab 5 + Weed decided that spouses would be welcome also. Since Geranium was on a work trip once again I flew solo to Charleston. We rented an Air BnB downtown and flew in on Friday night.
I won’t bore you with details (Pretty much all we did was drink and eat) but I have to be honest. I really enjoyed Charleston. If you have a chance get there. They have tons of bars and neat food joints.
Like I said, it was a good trip and we had some fun down there. I later found out that Charleston was the town that Bourdain ate at the Waffle House.
I recall those days of flying with my little sister and mother like it were yesterday. When we would fly I would be required to dress to the nines with shirt, tie and blue blazer. My sister would be done up in her best Sunday dress with bows in her hair and naturally we would sit in the smoking section of the plane. It was great!
Think about that for a second.. We had a fucking smoking section on those dirty ass metal tubes! I will be honest, I loved sitting in the smoking section growing up. It meant that we were closer to the flight attendants work area so we would get free refills on cokes. Yep Barbie would let my sister and I get all jacked up on Cokes while she smoked her Vantage Ultra Lights.
Geranium when she would fly for work would text me from time to time when she felt the need to punch someone in the dick for acting like an A-hole. I would normally make some snide comment because I knew was sitting in the First Class lounge having a drink while working. The best story was the woman who decided she would ignore the flight attendant’s request to turn her phone off and still was talking on it the engines were revving to take off. Geranium called the biotch out and got a couple “thank yous” from fellow passengers I might add.
So on some of my past trips I have been snapping people’s pictures who pretty much deserve to be put on Passenger Shaming. If you don’t follow them on IG (my boss informed me that this is the correct term to use instead of Instagram) you need to. Anyway here are some Pet Peeves of mine while traveling.
AKA if you do this………please Fucking Stop Immediately! The other option is don’t ever fly with me because I will call your ass out. I am serious when I say we are talking Ashley B “taking a photo of your food” calling out!
Hope you had a good laugh! But seriously do better folks and if you know someone who does this then please call them out on it!
So before you start in on me let me explain. For the past two and a half weeks Geranium has been off the road and working from home. Trust me when I say that the dog and I have enjoyed having Geranium home. That and she also helps with the chores in-between eating bon-bons. However, with her being home I really have not had time to blog or gather my thoughts. You see, once she gets done with her work it would be kind of a dick move for me to jump on my laptop. Hence why I have not been blogging since our trip to Charleston. I will catch up.
So without further wait, here are some pics from the past 2 weeks for Pictures of the week.
I do thank a couple of you assholes who were checking in on me. I am back and Geranium will be back on the road for a couple weeks straight.
Is that too much imagery? Sorry to some of you who are cleaning up hot coffee off your ifoam but I am about to do something I have NEVER EVER done in my Social Media life. I am going to use this blog to call Bullshit to a business that is screwing people left and right and they think they are doing us a favor.
Seriously and I apologize if I am going to turn a couple people off because of this post. Personally I think it is kind of of a dick move to trash a company on social media and not get their side of the story. But here is the issue guys and gals – They won’t give me a straight answer and refer to some policy that they have to follow. Let me tell you what happened.
When we went to the Redneck Rivera I had to travel solo as Geranium was flying from Seattle and she was going to meet me in Pensacola. Traditionally I always book air travel through the airlines directly because I have never had any issues. They also are great about booking me on a flight if I get stuck or a flight gets cancelled. This trip since we were needing a car I booked through Expedia and did a bundle. I was able to get the car a tad cheaper even though the flight was fairly expensive. It was a direct flight so I really didn’t care too much.
Getting down to Pensacola wasn’t a deal and even though I was delayed on the ground in Newark no issues.
The return however, was eye opening on how Expedia and what I now have learned all other booking companies do with their customer service. For the return flight back to Newark our flight gets cancelled. It happens. Now I am on the phone with United Airlines to get rebooked. They inform me because I didn’t book directly with them I have to contact the booking company so I am on the phone with Expedia for about 20 minutes.
I get skillet on the phone and explain that my flight is cancelled and I would like to be booked on the next flight. Meanwhile Geranium has been automatically rebooked on a flight tomorrow because she has some serious airline privileges with United. I on the other hand do not so I am still on hold with skillet. He informs me that because the flight has been cancelled he can’t help me get on a new flight but will refund my money for the cancelled flight.
Then……and here is where I almost cause a fucking scene in the airport. He has the balls to ask me if I would like for him to book me on a flight tomorrow. I ask him what if this flight gets cancelled for whatever reason will he do the same thing and give me credit but I am shit out of luck? He says yes.
I ask for a supervisor, there isn’t one. I take to Twitter and Direct Messages and get no solution. Seriously I am now stuck in Pensacola and now have to shell out over 7 bills to get me home. I book my return directly with Delta since the United flight that Geranium was going to burn miles to get me on was now sold out.
I was pissed. I still am pissed. That is why I wanted to wait at least a month to take my anger out and post on Social Media. I want all of you out there, all 15 of you, to know that if you book though a booking company like Expedia and if something happens to the flight you are screwed.
Ok Rant over but seriously Expedia – Go Fuck yourselves.
I hope you at least had a laugh at my expense. Book Direct Folks. Don’t be a dumbass like Carbunkle Trumpet.
I just like it. It makes me happy and I also know that Memphis is probably going to be in a heat advisory since it is Dead Elvis Week. Did you know that I can also forecast the Memphis weather?
Coldest Day of the Year in Memphis – Whatever day they play the Liberty Bowl Game
Hottest Day of the Year in Memphis – Around Dead Elvis Week
Rainiest Day/Week of the Year in Memphis – Beale Street Musicfest or World Championship BBQ Cooking Contest.
I mean if you know the past, you can predict the future.
I am going to share with you some pictures I snapped this past Sunday from the Murphranks Rooftop. Bobcat & Professor were there along with Rocky and Monkey Head Maya. Sorry folks but No pictures of the Humans – I mean have you ever seen Meg or Bobcat in the same place? Same goes for Matt or the Professor? Come to think of it, I haven’t seen Geranium for the past 24 hours. I bet she is in Seattle again.
Tomorrow I take the gloves off and blast expedia for their shitty customer service.