SHOUT OUTS BABY!

Pictures of the Week from the Redneck Rivera.

So we will finish the week with some final pictures from our week down in the Redneck Rivera. Like I said, we had a blast and we look forward to next years trip. I figure by then maybe Knuckleheads #1 & #2 will be able to fetch Uncle Robo and Uncle RJ some cold pops! Captain can you start teaching the kids how to make Painkillers for next year.

Returning from the day on the beach. Notice the Cigar in my left hand. That was Cigar #22 for the week.
“Mom, we are tired of posing, Uncle Robo can we act a fool?”
“Go Ahead Kids! Fly that Freak Flag!”
Thank God we ordered the Small Drinks!
Happy 4th of July!
Need a bottle of Tito’s and a Dildo? We have found the place for you!
4 Toe Heads having dinner! I miss them!
I also miss this Bushwacker too!
Maya had a good Vacation too!
Hate to tell everyone but Knucklehead #2 took Daddy to school on the tabletop games!

Next week we will return to normal NYC Shenanigans. One should always get out of the city for a couple of days. We had fun with all of these jokers.

Advertisements

While in the South….

One should always pay proper homage to their southern roots. What does this mean folks???? A trip to the FloraBama and Waffle House!

Recall when Sean Brock and Anthony Bourdain went to Waffle House and these words were muttered?

“You don’t come here expecting the French Laundry,” Brock says. “You come here expecting something amazing.” “This is better than the French Laundry,” Bourdain replies.

No disrespect to Thomas Keller (Landlord and Mr. 3 First Names – Cover your eyes) but in the south the Waffle House kicks the shit out of French Laundry and twice on Sunday Morning! After a quick trip to the Florabama RJ and I asked our driver if they would drop us off at the Waffle House for a small meal. We arrived just before midnight and after a brief wait were ushered to a seat at the counter.

In proper respect to Sean Brock & Bourdain, I ordered a Pecan Waffle as an appetizer which puzzled RJ and settled for the 2 eggs fried, Scattered, Smothered, Covered X 2, Bacon and toast breakfast. I believe that RJ chowed down on a Philly Breakfast plate but when I recalled looking over there it was gone!

Maria – is there a Waffle House around these parts? I see a couple in PA.

The Florabama was warm and very GOP’ish to say the least!
Talk about a dick move by the Florabama. You ain’t in Brooklyn Bitch, you in the South!
It is about to go down!
Yes Please
The Nerve Center of Waffle House – The kitchen
Now that I look at this sober I realize we got screwed!
Oh my Cholesterol is hitting high Triple digits!
RJ’s Plate – Now I know why he was singing Ring of Fire the next morning – Jalapeno Peppers!
Wonder why I was so thirsty!
I am ashamed of the bill. It was high!
The Next morning I had a party scar and I was eating Imodium like it was Pez

Again apologies to Jenn for forgetting the hashbrowns in the Uber. I blame RJ for leaving it!

There are 2 things that will always say the truth no matter what….. 2/2

Spandex and a 3 year old.

So when I left you I was peeing in the Gulf of Mexico with RJ. The rest of the week we pretty much stayed close to home. We did make a trip on a boat one day and that was a lot of fun. During that 3 hour boat tour some folks got White Girl White Claw Wasted and it was good to hang with our friends. Like I said before; for 2 people who don’t have children who freely want to vacation with 2 other families and their children says something. But then again these kids are pretty good and the only real tears shed that week was when we had to leave on Saturday to go back to the real world. Well that was until Expedia Fucked me.

Mallory and Elsie Hanging
Geranium and I
Captain
This was my Cartoon Watching Buddy
Beautiful Day on the water and at the beach!
Geranium preparing lunch
Knucklehead #2 enjoying String Cheese while dipping it into Rotel Cheese. (Makes me tear up just thinking about it)
Pour that shit in the sink. It isn’t even worth mixing it with Vodka!
JMH and RJ

Pictures of the Week

T-Minus 24 Hours till I am out of the office. Geranium is going to fly from Seattle and we will meet up in an airport to be named later.

Tomato Salad with Crackers – you can’t get much more Southern than this one
Catalonia Tomato Bread
Sofrito – Catalan Tomato and Onion Sauce
Miso Roasted Asparagus
Finished Product
Street Dog on Bourdain Day
While Sitting at Roco’s Tacos
Elsie and AR are going to love Uncle Robo next week
No more Hanks
Subways getting ready for Pride Weekend
So is Maya! She can’t wait to see Aunt Chelle

Have a good week!

Highfalutin at The Met

So we had a great time seeing Play it Loud with all the musical artifacts and current instruments. I found out on Monday afternoon that John Meyer actually use Jerry Garcia’s “Wolf” on Saturday (or Sunday) and it was to be returned to the wall on Tuesday. After we did the exhibit we passed on the Gift Shop and trekked up to the rooftop of the Met for a drink and a view of the Park from the East Side.

I won’t tell you how much one round cost for us but the view up there is pretty sweet. Each Spring they have an exhibit up there and a lot of times we just throw up our hands and say “Ok its Art.” Last year UWS Holly and us saw an exhibit that was some creature in trash bags. This year it was Balls and Frames or as we call it; a perfectly good waste of space.

Later we went to a safe place and hung out with our Cubano purveyor of Spirits and got to see our Salad Loving friends Mike and Carrie. Yes I called you salad eating jokers out on my worthless dribble. Got eat a steak or in our case some Fried Cheese.

Enough words here are some great pictures from this past Friday.

They had a pen and pencil drawing class for Pride Month. That is a lot of ruffles!
Kuddos to the Met for embracing Pride Month. They really had a great attendance here.
The proctor was giving helpful pointers
Call it what you want – but this is a waste of space!
Really we need a 6 food barrier from some rusting 4X4 metal?
At least we can see the West Side
Too Much Face for the Robo Selfie!
Balls and sticks and it probably costs more than your house, your parents house and people up here too!
Love us some Midtown Manhattan Views
Back to familiar Places and a proper Selfie

Like I said, we had a blast on Friday.

Play It Loud Exhibit @ The Met

When I heard that The Met was going to have an exhibit featuring the musical instruments I was pumped. This past Friday Geranium and I made out way back to the UES and took advantage of the nice weather and late summer hours. If you are a Music Nerd or fan of Concerts/Festivals you need to see this. BK – I know you probably won’t want to come from Queens to the UES but you need to see this. It is worth the price of admission. What I found out very quickly was how many guitars I would see and immediately say “Oh that is X’s guitar” without needing to read the description.

Anyway this is going to be a long post with the pictures so enough rambling.

Chuck Berry’s Guitar
Jerry Lee Lewis aka The Killer’s Piano!
Muddy Water’s Guitar
The King’s Guitar – That is Elvis Presley if you didn’t know that. And we can’t be friends.
Who doesn’t recognize Bo Diddly’s Cigar Box Shaped Guitar
Of course it does help when the talent puts their name on the instrument.
The Beatles…..never heard of them
John Lennon’s guitar on loan from Yoko
Pete Townshend’s Les Paul that he didn’t destroy
Edward VanHalen’s Ax
Recognize one of Jimmy Hendrix’s V?
What is going on here? Did someone pull a Thomas Crown on this exhibit?
It says it should be Keith Richards guitar that was gifted to him by a guy named Eric Clapton. What gives?
What an asshole that would Indian giver his guitar? Well he has outlived a lot of old rockers
The Edge’s Stratocaster. I mean he didn’t ask for this for his tour.9
Jimmy Hendrix’s Flying V. Notice the hologram behind the exhibit.
Angus Young’s Guitar and Geranium
Who doesn’t recognize Flea’s Bass
I am going out on a limb here and say that this is Patty Smith’s touring instrument.
Here is for you Mo-Ho Band Geeks
Clarence Carter’s Sax!
No need to name the artist. Everyone knows this custom baby
Steve Miller’s Les Paul
Bruce Springsteen’s Fender
And if you are wondering how I am able to recall all this I would take a picture of the description following the exhibit. I may have been born at night but not last night.
Paul Stanley’s Guitar
I will give you a hint – This song was sung by everyone at My Pleasure Bar in Fayetteville Arkansas in the early 90’s.
“I am a Joker, I am a Smoker, I am a Midnight Toker….”
A 5 Neck Custom? Cheap Trick anyone?
So this is the fragment of Jimmy Hendrix’s Stratocaster that he destroyed in a sacrifice at the Monterrey Pop Festival in 1967. He then dropped to his knees and poured lighter fluid on it and lit it on fire.
Now here is what is cool that I learned. He wanted to upstage Pete Townshend who was famous for destroying his guitar onstage. I think he did it!
Speaking of Pete Townshend
Anyone a Jerry Garcia fan? Here is his beloved “Wolf”
They also had a bunch of posters of artists. What is ironic about this one is that we actually know someone who was at this show. And she is photographed in the background screaming her head off.
The original Woodstock Poster
How cool is that!

Like I said, if you are a music buff you need to see this exhibit that runs until October.

Pictures of The Week

Had a great week. That was until Geranium decided to shame my ass on having a slight salt addition. This weekend will be brief as she has to leave on Sunday for Seattle. However next Saturday we are going to the Red Neck Rivera.

YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH WHEN TALKING ABOUT MY SALT COLLECTION! (Thankfully she doesn’t read this worthless dribble) In all seriousness I laughed my ass off. So I buy salt. At least I don’t buy cigars…..er oh well.
The Dog hid after that spirited arguement
Speaking of Cigars
The heat wasn’t like it was in the South but the Humidity was high AF!
Played some Dominoes last weekend.

By the way did you go buy Rebecca Coutant’s book yet?

Have a good weekend, if it is nice today we may be in the UES atop the Met Museum.

Pictures of the Week

It was a good week. Geranium returns tomorrow morning as she is catching the red eye from Seattle.

Geranium made the crapper smell nice
Bloomingdales….Oh the Shame! Its a Union Thing.
Going to see one of these jokers next month. Another one in this picture also celebrated his Divorce. “Second Happiest Day of my Life….Divorced!”
Summertime means breaking out the fun suits!
Decided that the Chuck Taylors needed a bath and cleaning.
Had the owner of the Madewood Flop House Sneak into town!
GurleyGurl, Doty and Mel – You want to come into town on September 11th and go to an old tennis stadium?
Yep, I was in Brooklyn on Sunday. Matching Buns
“Hello 911 – There is a plane crashing into the East River.” – you would be suprised how many of those calls happen in a week.

Have a good weekend Folks!

One Year Ago Tomorrow – We Lost A Great Traveler

I recall it like it was yesterday. The first text came from GrainbinGirl at like 7:AM (6:AM Memphis Time) then the next came from Pepe. “Anthony Bourdain was gone and by his own hand.” *Disclaimer – I have lost many a good friend and family member by their own hand. This post is not in any way shape or form trying to speak of this horrible disease. Sadly it takes too many good people*

Best Friends

So the loss of Antony Bourdain has bothered me for a while. Now that I have just finished up on a whirlwind tour with Shawna (yeah, I am serious when I use real names) I miss him even more.

Tunisa

For this post I plan on speaking about some of Tony’s quotes that I hold dear to my heart.  His friend Jose Andres said it best in his latest book in the tribute;

To our friend Anthony Bourdain, who spent his life planting seeds

That man put a bunch of seeds in my head and I owe it to him to make them grow and experience some of what he got to see. Let’s be honest….the Cock Sucker had the best life in the world and I am so grateful that I can try to do as much as I can!!! Enough with the chatter. Here are my favorite Bourdain Quotes in no sequential order and some notes;

  • “Travel changes you. As you move through this life and this world you change things slightly, you leave marks behind, however small. And in return, life — and travel — leaves marks on you.” – Loved my trip to a small town in Switzerland. You don’t get the same experience in the larger towns. Here I was just an American who couldn’t speak French and didn’t know I needed to bring a bag.
  • “If you’re twenty-two, physically fit, hungry to learn and be better, I urge you to travel – as far and as widely as possible. Sleep on floors if you have to. Find out how other people live and eat and cook. Learn from them — wherever you go.”Or if you are 49 years old do this and load up on the ADVIL! I am not going to lie, the travel I did to see Shawna was tough but I look back and loved every minute of it!
  • “The journey is part of the experience — an expression of the seriousness of one’s intent. One doesn’t take the A train to Mecca.”I landed at Heathrow exhausted but figured out the Tube Schedule, walked my ass through the rain and got to the hotel. I could have wimped out and paid a King’s Ransom for a Black Car but what is the point if you aren’t going to see and experience Rush Hour into London on a Friday?
  • “I’m a big believer in winging it. I’m also a big believer that you are never going to find perfect city travel experience or the perfect meal without a constant willingness to experience a bad one. Letting the happy accident happen is what a lot of vacation itineraries miss, I think, and I’m always trying to push people to allow those things to happen rather than stick to some rigid itinerary.”This was 100% Barcelona! I only had a list from The Notorious NFG but it was going to be a total wing it. I love that town. I want to go back and I want to go back now.  
  • “Drink heavily with locals whenever possible.”No Comment
  • “You learn a lot about someone when you share a meal together.” – Loved our visit with English Mike & Ellie as well as our visit with The Tour Agent and Curly Sue in Switzerland. I know that our paths will cross again and when it does. I plan on picking up from where we left off.
  • “Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”It is very well documented that I smoke cigars, drink alcohol on occasion, and need a cholesterol pill. Sure, I try to keep myself leaning towards the cleaner side of life but what’s the point of living if you can’t slide down butt naked on a sheet of ice. Yes, I ordered the damn goose liver and I loved it!
  • “I learned a long time ago that trying to micromanage the perfect vacation is always a disaster. That leads to terrible times.”I am hoping she never reads this but I so disagree with Z-Squared and her guerrilla vacation tactics. I love her to death and will be that “3AM phone call guy to come bury a body” guy but I can’t vacation with her. Let that shit roll off the back.

And will I finish with this one. I will always have the deepest respect and love for Ernie and Lynn Mellor for giving an out of work carnie a job.

  • “Barbecue may not be the road to world peace, but it’s a start.” – Nothing is better than standing over a hot smoker busting balls and or discussing life. I am always appreciate of the visits with the Asian Fireman in Woodlawn.

So, if you have not figured out by my already 900 words this is telling you to go out and explore. It doesn’t have to be in a different country. It can be in a different part of your home town.

All you have to do is be friendly, be respectful and always be humble.

How cool would it be if you were having a lunch on this beach?

Rest in peace Tony. I am still pissed I didn’t get to drink with you at Billy Mark but that is more for a selfish reason.

To honor you I will try to see as much of this world as you did.

Best of Luck to The Second Generation Italian Society

Due to Geranium wanting to travel all the time we will not be able to attend this years Italian Festival in beautiful Crime-Free Marquette Park. We had talked of going but she was not scheduled to be back in New York until late Friday night. The team has been together for I want to say 27 years and the festival is celebrating 30 years as the main fundraiser for Holy Rosary Church and School.

Good Luck Guys!

Stolen from GrainBin Girl
Ah the year that Geranium (who does not look happy right now) and I squared off on who makes a better Gravy
I hear that it isn’t supposed to Rain this year. That is great considering it rained every other fucking year!
Ahh the Full Week In Europe or Knee Surgery for Monkey Head Maddy. I was prepping the Gravy to serve to the masses at the house and she was laid up cripple.
Oh there is no rain, bring your flip flops guys.

Let me know if you need more Paper Towels, Trash Bags or Red Solo Cups!