Sunday-Funday Dinner

Quick Trip to the Fun Side of the Wall – Spring Break Baby!

Not sure if some of you are aware but Geranium has left me, she has left the dog, and she temporarily no longer living in Downtown Brooklyn.

Well that should get a couple of bites on my social media accounts. Those jokers are now saying “Whisky Tango Foxtrot Paul Allen/Carbunkle Trumpet!” What the Fuck did you do now?

Relax gang, Mary Louise is over in Switzerland for a month getting her company ready for a Bed Pan launch. It is easier for her to already be in the EU instead of a bunch of trips back and forth from NYC. She has been gone now a week and I am not going to lie one bit….. I miss the shit out of her! The dog……she is missing her too.

When it was official that Mary Louise was to take this month long trip we decided that we needed to get away for a couple of days and have some ‘us’ time. While we were upstate last month, I challenged our Travel Agent to come up with a couple of good All Inclusive Resorts for us. We were booking this thing in the matter of weeks so we didn’t have time to shop, find a deal or even mess with it. Jerre Martin of Prosper Travel knocked it out of the park for us. She recommended a Secrets SilverSands (not sure why there isn’t a space but that is the way everyone spelled it) Riviera Adults Only Resort in Cancun that was perfect for us. Seriously, and I don’t normally give props to resorts but if you want a small all inclusive adult joint with a nice beach, pool, and great staff…..This is the place for you.

We left New York Friday evening and got into Cancun around 11PM. We got to our room and went to bed because we were so tired promptly to the bar and made up for lost time while were. We were there till Tuesday late afternoon and returned on the 19:30 flight to Newark from Cancun. The food was good, the drink was cold, they had Kettle One for me and a wine that Geranium enjoyed. Now here is where you are going to say that we are getting old.

The entertainment team at Secrets SilverSands Riveria is top notch! They made sure that if you didn’t want to be bothered, the left you alone. If you played in the pool, they made you feel welcome. And if you were like our old asses playing Bingo and Blackjack, they had fun with you! Seriously if you want to make a trip with just you and the spouse. we found the All Inclusive for you!

Me – “Señor ¿cómo se llama una cerveza y una margarity congelada juntos?”
Bartender – We call it an “Ernie Mellor” Sir!
Oh Great all you two did down there was just drink and take pictures at the bar….
Hey RJ – They carried Hillbilly Ale too!
Last Pic of booze I promise…….
Here is a pic of the resort I stole off the internet. I was a fun resort that wasn’t too big. 3 to 4 days and you have done it all!
This was cool! This is a simple end table with a marble top and the melted wine bottles on top of it for like 4 months. The build up was huge and really made the entry into the French Restaurant. I could do this! But probably not in Brooklyn.
I was really cool and made a great statement in the room
Some Asshole Left the Dominos in New York (thanks Maya, you packed me) so we had to find some in the gift shop.
Hey Blue Water Grill in Belize! I got you taken care of for those plates.
Here are some of those Cancer Causing Windmills.
Maya didn’t miss our asses one bit! Carla is great and she had more fun with her than we do.
Last Meal out of Cancun at Jimmy Buffet’s Bar.

Seriously, we had a blast down in Mexico and it was a fun trip before Mary Louise Geranium’s trip to Switzerland. Again our travel agent knocked it out of the park for us. I gave her a list of our wants (Good Beach, Adults Only, Don’t want to spend an arm & leg, and age appropriate guest list) and she gave us a great recommendation. More to come in these past trips.

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Sunday Funday Mexico Photo Dump

Mary Louise has left my ass again………for Seattle………then her ass goes to Mexico for a girl’s weekend with Baby Fine Hair so I am sitting on the 3rd floor veranda blogging. Hey Mr 3 First Names and Landlord you guys want to get into some trouble between now and next Monday? I am going to be unsupervised till then. So while I have the wash going on trying to get the Hickory Smoke smell out of them from this past weekend I figure I would post the last of the Mexico pictures, well those that we can recall taking sober.

Isla was a blast, the group we went down with was fun and we had great weather. Oh and we got to see the Cuban Band and I am going on record saying that if Mary Louise goes to see them next Sunday I am going to be really jealous.

IMG_3801Oh I am sure that this is approved in the States at a lot of the job sites.

IMG_3771Poor LZ we had her all confused with the nicknames. “So is he Smoothie, Pepe or what?”

IMG_3777One of these days I am going to get a proper invite instead of having to jump over the fence.

IMG_3753That damn Cuban lead singer made the Future Mrs. Gonzales lose her pants. What goes on in Mexico stays in Mexico.

IMG_3751The Mexican Version of “Mustang Sally” isn’t as good as one would think

IMG_3752Lil Man was getting after it!

IMG_3739It is hard being Carbunkle Trumpet you know? Those 25 Cigars aren’t going to smoke themselves.

IMG_3755Momma L was gettin it as the Cheese Grater Guy was making his rounds.

IMG_3748Sunday in Isla is fun!

IMG_3741I hear that they have good Mediterranean Pizza. I wouldn’t know because my piece was on the fucking floor.

Till Next Time Isla! Maybe we can make a quick trip this winter.

 

Memorial Day BBQ – Woodlawn Style

On Sunday of Memorial Day weekend we headed up to Woodlawn for a Backyard BBQ and to see Lightbulb. The menu included Ribs, Pulled Pork and Chicken Lollipops. The weather was hit and miss because we had tons of rain earlier in the day but thankfully by the time we got to Woodlawn it was nice out. We hung out with the Asian Fireman and family and a good day was had by all.

Trust me when I say that the lollipops were just as good as they looked.

IMG_3285According to the Asian Fireman it took about an hour to prep these beautiful little bird legs.

IMG_3283Smoked Butter is applied to the chicken for the first 2 hours, then you dredge the chicken into BBQ Sauce and put on a wire rack to coat with goodness.

IMG_3282Wee Fiona damn near ate the bone too!

IMG_3281Callie sucked the marrow out of the bone and he almost bit me when I reached for my second.

Thanks to the Lee’s for a great time!

Q – What Does 2 years ago CBT and “The Mooch” have in common?

Editors Note – Yes, I am delving into the political genre. You know that it violates my code of discussing the Taboo 5 topics (Religion, Politics, Current Events, Gun Control, & Birth Control) but this is too good not to pass up. 

The answer you ask? 2 years ago Carbunkle Trumpet was without a job much like The Mooch but hell, At least the Mooch has a car to drive around town! I know cheap shot but hey you have to laugh to keep from crying. One of the things that I actually enjoy on Facebook is the tab “On this day” as I like to look back on stuff that I either posted or people posted on my page. Two years ago yesterday I was reminded that I left my position at HW/AMF and promptly after leaving Tully Street I turned in my Jeep so not only was I jobless I didn’t’ even have a damn car to drive. Talk about taking a plunge!

I plan on posting later this week a look back being that this Saturday will mark 2 years of living here in Gotham. This time 2 years ago I think that I was trying to hide my fears of walking close to the edge by having one last “Board Meeting” with RJ, Mal-O-Rie, Lisa Marie, Double Birds, KS, and some others. Again I want to thank Ernie Mellor the owner and head Pitmaster and his wife Lynn for the opportunity to work with a bunch of great people at Hog Wild/A Moveable Fest Catering Company. That is a class organization and I am a better person for working with such an eclectic staff. Love you guys!

Back to Normal Banter – This past weekend we celebrated the start of Restaurant Week/Month. We had dinner at Boulud Sud with the Murphranks and enjoyed many drinks afterwards at our Per Se drinking establishment. Dinner was killer on Friday night so Saturday we kept pretty quiet and hung out at the house considering it was overcast and dreary. Sunday we met up with the old Neighbor and her husband and ended up having dinner at Hearth with Maria and Bad Back Bill. 

Mrs. Trumpet got to mark down that she saw another celebrity. Walking back from drinks with the Neighbor and Husband we strolled down Madison Avenue and saw Rod Stewart having lunch with his wife Penny Lancaster on the street at Nello. We walked by and I had to point him out to Mrs. Trumpet but she now can say she has seen Al Roker, Larry David and now Rod Stewart. Not too shabby on a Sunday if you ask me.

IMG_1390What am I? I am a Christmas Tree because I am lit! Well not so much lit but tired from 2 days of seeing bands at CitiField.

IMG_1384You know me, I don’t like to take pictures of plated food. I think that JAM Foodie was snapping pics of plates so go peruse her Instagram account.

rod_stewart_2015Didn’t want to be “That Guy” and take a pic of Rod having lunch because that is tacky. That and the big ass bodyguard who was standing right by the table made us think twice.

IMG_1385Anybody need any Hay for a Wedding Prop? There was some on E86th Street.

Have a good day and try to stay cool!

 

Pictures of the Week

Had some fun over the past weekend. Here are some that were on my iFoam.

IMG_1219One will ever know if these bike locks will be claimed

IMG_1218I mean those are two sexy words – Bar and Bacon! RAB this is in Hells Kitchen on 9th Avenue

IMG_1217Twas a Brave Man who first ate the First Oyster!

IMG_1216Was it Grey Shirt Day for Sunday Funday? I think so.

IMG_1215Yes J-bob Niketown is still here

IMG_1171I am going to shit in your shoes so hard – Monkey Head Maya

IMG_1160Snuck down to my Boys on Bleaker Street on Wednesday

As seen at the Cigar Joint on 2nd Ave

Have a good weekend.

 

 

What do you do for groceries?

You would be surprised how many times we get asked that question. I swear that some people think that just because we don’t have a car or Kroger in Midtown we are starving up here. Granted we do have a grocery store right across the street but I am not a fan of Anal Rape and don’t like paying 100 bucks for 4 items that should cost 20 bucks in the suburbs.

We do have Fresh Direct and Peapod food delivery services but they don’t carry everything so we are forced to go out to hunt and gather. The Morton Williams across the street is ok for things you need in a pinch but they cost more than Whole Foods or a bodega and I prefer Fairways Grocery. A couple of weeks back my former boss, Ernie Mellor, posted a Grilled Corn and Butter Bean summer salad that we used to enjoy. I was craving that so I decided on Sunday morning I would venture up to E86th Street to get provisions. Now the Fairways is about 18 blocks away and schlepping groceries isn’t the easiest in New York if you don’t have a buggy. I bought one a couple years ago and it is great for carrying stuff to and from.

I jump on the Q to E86th street and thankfully the store wasn’t mobbed as one would normally expect. I credit this to lots of people being out of town and that it was rather early in the morning. I get my groceries and lug my cart back to the apartment and get to work on grilling some corn and make the salad. Dinner was excellent by the way.

IMG_1172Here is the recipe for those of you New Yorkers who wish to have something different.

IMG_1179Here is my little Cart while we wait for the Sunday Subway schedule

IMG_1180Fairly Quiet on E86th Street this morning.

IMG_1181Front of the store on E86th Street

IMG_1182Prepared Fruits Section

IMG_1195I knew that the little clip I picked up at Home Depot would come in handy. I can hang my buggy on the shopping cart.

IMG_1196The Produce Section is killer here.

IMG_1197Anybody need 40 pounds of Garlic?

IMG_1198This joint has a serious Butcher and Fish Monger Station.

IMG_1199Not going to lie there are about 20 different species of fish that I am not familiar with when I come here

IMG_1200A Casino Clam?

IMG_1203Went with Crab Cakes in honor of some former Memphian’s that are now new Baltimorean residents

IMG_1202Oh Look, the Gluten Haters have their own section.  Yep, I am going to take some shit from UWS Holly for this one. I have always poked fun of Gluten Free people and or Vegetarians saying that they were the new Al Qaeda because people used it as the new diet. UWS Holly actually is gluten intolerant and can’t digest it. Personally that sucks because who doesn’t love Jiffy Cornbread? Oh yeah, I am getting a text message for this one.

IMG_1201They love some Goya Canned Vegetables up here. Would it kill you to carry the Glory Brand?

IMG_1210Joker is packed to the gills ready to head back to E71st Street.

IMG_1211Here comes the Q Train

IMG_1212Just one subway stop. There were lots of people heading to Midtown to the Pride Parade

IMG_1213Taking Stairs with this cart is a pain in the ass. Thankfully they have lots of escalators on the new Second Avenue Subway line.

IMG_1214Finished the Corn and Butter Bean Salad (used a different version of cherry tomatoes to give it a different color)

Note to self – You are a fool if you don’t use one of the grocery delivery services for having bottled water, mixers or other heavy ass items delivered to your door.

 

 

 

Random Pictures on the iFoam – Memphis Edition

Some of these are pretty good. Then again some of these are pretty bad depending on how you look at them.

IMG_0908Someone (not me) was enjoying their “Soul Burger” on the walk from home into South Bluffs

IMG_0926Had to snap a picture of my first downtown condo. Why the hell We didn’t keep that sucker is a mystery to me.

IMG_0941Me and A-Cups on the porch Sunday. We don’t have porches here in New York, we have stoops.

IMG_0934I took some major shit from the NYC boys for my “Preakness” Attire. I had to wear a jacket to Weed’s party and it was kind of warm so I broke out the shorts too. That was my first beer too!

IMG_0909Hadn’t seen this knucklehead in years. She is all grown up! We will have to add her and her sister to the CARL LIPBALM MEMORIAL SCHOLARSHIP list.

IMG_0940Lisa Marie and her little sister Willimena Esmerelda (she was born on Willie Nelson’s birthday) also do you not see her giving me an a Elvis pose? 

Don’t worry, that is all for the pictures from Memphis so relax.

Is it a Sub, Hero, Hoagie, Grinder or Sandwich?

Made a trip to Atlantic City this past weekend to see “The Neighbor” and her husband. We also had a brief appearance by “The Gay Coke Dealer” for a one and done Friday night. We had a great time and on leaving AC we decided to grab some Subs at the world famous White House. I called the order in at 11AM to be ready at 2PM and I am glad I did. The story is that the doors opened in October 1946 and have been serving the New Jersey Submarine sandwiches ever since.

We opted for the Original and a Cheesesteak with and added sweet peppers. I walked into the joint and it is packed tighter than Dick’s Hatband. Between people waiting for table service, to go orders there isn’t much room to move around. I ask the waitress where I go for call in orders and she tells me to head to the back by the walk in freezer. I go back there but I am stuck in the ‘Go Order’ line and ask again. Literally I had to go into the kitchen to get my order. I tell them my name and they hand me two baseball bats wrapped in paper.

We make our way home and after some beers at Iggy’s we decide that it is time for the Subs. Even cold they sandwiches were unbelievable and the Bread…..Oh the Bread that my friends is what makes this a great sandwich.

IMG_0827Homeslice wasn’t too crazy that I was taking pictures but I told them that I knew the Gay Coke Dealer and all was forgiven.

IMG_0836You can’t understand how big this sucker is by this angle.

IMG_0835I had to get out the Stanley Black and Decker Tape Measure for this.

IMG_0837This is about 6 inches of the Original for us to eat. Knock it off Nova – I know what you are going to say.

IMG_0838The Philly and Here is when I realized they forgot to include the Sweet Peppers.

IMG_0839We still have plenty of sandwiches to eat the rest of the week.

Thanks to the Neighbor and her welfare receiving husband for a great time and we will see you again soon. As far as the Margate Dad…..You know that I still love you!

 

 

What we do Monday – Friday

I get asked about once a week from people wanting to know if our lifestyle is similar to a “Sex in the City” or “American Psycho” in that we are work crazy hours and then party all night Monday through Friday like it is our job. Sorry to disappoint some of you but nope, it has been quite a long time since we partied till the wee hours in the morning and then made it into work still inebriated….well there was the day after the Cubs winning the World Series Thursday. But I digress, so here in 7 paragraphs or less is what we do in a normal work week.

Monday thru Friday is pretty much get out of bed by 6AM, shower, dogs walked, get out and sell those double decker bus tickets. For Mrs. Trumpet, it is get up at 7 and then she has that shitty commute to the office….all 2 minutes of it. She normally is home by 5sih so we both keep normal hours. On Monday mornings I head into the mid 40’s to one of the satellite offices to take a conference call, get my week organized, and to steal some office supplies. Monday’s are a day that a lot of my coworkers do admin work at home all day and get ready for the week. Eff that if I stayed at home I would still be in my PJ’s so I get my big ass out and get some ish done.

On my way to my territory on Mondays I always swing by St. Patrick’s cathedral on 5th Ave. Even though this isn’t my parish church I consider it close enough. If you have never visited St. Patrick’s Cathedral along the walls in the main sanctuary are individual Saint’s alters or grottos. I make it a point to light a candle at my favorite big 3 alters; St. John Baptist de la Salle, St. Anthony of Padua, and St. Jude the Apostle. I would not categorize myself as an overly religious person but I am a firm believer of Karma and keeping a positive outlook or spirit. I will and always will be respectful of different religions. I believe that you become a better person by opening up yourself to someone while they explain their beliefs to you. Yep, I am getting pretty deep here. Ok, let me pull back some.

During the week, we pretty much come home each night after work, have dinner and chill at our apartment. Tuesday’s momma has class so I get the dog sitter to swing by to walk the monkey heads  (best 25 bucks we spend a week) so I can head over to the Cigar Inn for some early evening ball busting. Other than that, we are homebodies, cook our food delivery meals (Blue Apron, Marley Spoon, or Hello Fresh) and we may go out one night for happy hour.

*This past week was somewhat of an exception. Wednesday night we went to a fundraiser gathering for our work’s designated charity. Big deal you are probably saying, right? Well our fundraiser was a happy hour at a Karaoke Bar in Koreatown!  Sorry  Professor Paul, you can take the guy out of Memphis but you can’t take the Karaoke out of the New Yorker! It does say a lot when you can laugh at someone other than yourself when they try to sing “Puff the Magic Dragon” personally I know that I slayed “Suspicious Minds”.

*Thursday was a simple lunch with clients. We, my international counterpart and I, invited another international rep to join us with our two eye-talian customers. Lunch was great, we handled the objectives, and we got to hang with the owner of AS Monaco FC. *Full Disclosure* The international counterpart (who also is southern, THANK GOD) and I didn’t have a clue who the owner was so we got a pass. But let me tell you, if it were Danny Ford, Steve Spurrier, or Lou Holtz, we would have been all over that.

Fridays are normally reserved for follow up calls, prospecting and finish up the admin work.  Let me tell you, there is nothing worse than having to work on the weekend. *Yes I am looking at you SS, ML, & LZ* Momma and I have a strict rule that we have always adhered to since we moved up here. That rule is simple; If you have to work on the weekend it is fine and acceptable but if yo ass has to work on Sunday-Funday well it better be Effing Huge and Tax Bracket Moving Worthy!!!!

I am sorry but Sundays are for friends and family, I learned that from my visits to Belize many times. I think back to the best times I ever had on San Pedro and it was always with my family and my Belizean sister, Florita, and her family on a Sunday.

st-anthonySt. Anthony’s Alter at St. Patrick’s

Saint Patrick's Cathedral In New York CitySt John Baptist de la Salle’s Alter

st-judeSt Jude’s alter at St. Patrick

1915126_97882114927_1293089_nMy Belizean Sister Florita who now ironically lives in Denver – She looks great as she always does. Me – Who is that fat boated gringo?

st-patricksEntrance at St. Patrick’s Cathedral

Anyway, that is what we do in a week. This upcoming week is going to be a short one so we will be busy from the start. The next weekend, hell I get to put on a monkey suit and go hang out at the Waldorf Astoria.

*These were exceptions for the week.

 

Dive Bar Sunday – Milano’s Bar NYC

It has been a long summer and now that the Seersucker suit has been put away it is time to get back to our old shenanigans and enjoy the fruits of the city. You have heard me speak of having “A guy” and how vital it is. Back in Memphis, one didn’t need to have “a guy” you managed on your own or sought advice from friends and family. Up here, well you need “a guy” and depending on what you were doing you may need many of them.
Case in point my boy JM or Joey Pearl Jam, not only does he have a “a guy” but he just finished remodeling his house in…..wait for it….New Jersey.  Actually he had many “guys” doing work for him on that project. JM and I were talking a while back about good ole fashioned Dive Bars and that they are a part of Americana. Sadly, they are being replaced daily with either a Chipotle or a gastropub that has a mixologist instead of a bartender.  These are the type of joints that would serve a lemon wedge with tap water and charge you 2 bucks because it is a fancy ionized and desalinated bottled water that ran from gluten free ice caps in Alaska. Don’t me wrong, I have had many a fancy cocktail up here in the 14 months of living here but deep down I am a dive bar fan at heart.
This past Friday I took my boss up to Jimmy’s Corner on W44th and her first comment was “Where did you find this place? I kind of like it! I won’t order a glass of wine here but I dig it!” Oh and shout out to Double Birds and her Husband who were in town last weekend for the wedding of the year. It was great seeing you and having a couple drinks before you got all fancified. 

But I digress, so JM was telling me about a place that is in NoHo that I should try out. Ironically, the bar that he told me about used to be in his family and the name of the bar is the same as his last name. In his words “It is a classic Beer and a Shot type of bar.” I hadn’t even been there and I was in love with it.  Here is the 411 on Milano’s Bar according to an article written about it in Time Out Magazine.
Milano’s has been serving up drinks since 1880  (only stopping during the Prohibition years) and remains one of the last authentically old-school bars in the city. It can be a tight squeeze on crowded nights and the place is definitely no frills when it comes to atmosphere, but the bar’s décor—featuring swinging saloon bathroom doors, a tin ceiling, and a tile floor—is a wonderful break from gimmicks when you just want a drink. Its walls are adorned with old pictures and Yankees Memorabilia. It is the last bastion of Dive Bars in New York.

img_2455Notice all the wires on the left side of the picture? They had like 3 different multi plug adaptors all plugged into one outlet. I am sure it is fine.

img_2454It reminds me of Alex’s Tavern kind of you know? Except for all the Yankees stuff on the walls.

img_2453No need for overhead lights, plenty of Neon and Christmas Tree lights.

img_2452No food is served here but this old menu suggests they did at one time. Who doesn’t want a Veal Cutlet & 2 Vegetables for 30 cents.

img_2451You bet your sweet arse that we had Bud Lights. No fancy beer for us, we are simple folk.

img_2450I take it back, they do serve food here, those chips are fresh I am sure of it!

I will do better on my Dive Bar reporting. Momma gets back from a weekend trip on Sunday at noon so we will be heading on the 6 train to somewhere!

Have a good weekend.