Talk bad about my city and we will argue

Pictures of the Week

Had some fun over the past weekend. Here are some that were on my iFoam.

IMG_1219One will ever know if these bike locks will be claimed

IMG_1218I mean those are two sexy words – Bar and Bacon! RAB this is in Hells Kitchen on 9th Avenue

IMG_1217Twas a Brave Man who first ate the First Oyster!

IMG_1216Was it Grey Shirt Day for Sunday Funday? I think so.

IMG_1215Yes J-bob Niketown is still here

IMG_1171I am going to shit in your shoes so hard – Monkey Head Maya

IMG_1160Snuck down to my Boys on Bleaker Street on Wednesday

As seen at the Cigar Joint on 2nd Ave

Have a good weekend.

 

 

Advertisements

2016 The Year in Review

Let me start right now and say that 2016 was a great year for the Trumpets. Sure our presidential candidate didn’t win but we didn’t ‘take to the streets’ protesting or putting up post it notes in the Union Square Subway station. If you don’t like the outcome you have one option – Move the Fuck Out!  As far as celebrity deaths; yes we will miss David Bowie, Nancy Reagan, Frank Jr., Prince, Leon Russell, and even Father John Francis Mulcahy but that is the life cycle. We won’t miss Fidel or even Harambe the Gorilla! Ok, enough with my political and current event posts.

2016 was welcomed with Jimmy Buffet and good friends in Brooklyn and it turned out to be a great one. It was great professionally for the both of us and even Mrs. Trumpet is currently (as I type this) studying for her NYU class right now. 2016 found me a permanent home selling tour bus tickets in the Upper East Side with a great team. Hell, I am even now sending money via Vinmo so I guess I am getting hip. We made trips to Belize, Tulum, Isla Mujeres (RJ has heard it both ways), Boston, and even Chicago to see the World Series. I made 3 trips to Memphis and Mrs. Trumpet snuck into Memphis too. There were trips to the other boroughs, trips to Atlantic City to see The Damn Neighbor, Philly, Fayetteville, AR, and Grand Rapids.

One of my former “Daddy’s” (boss) welcomed into the world his first son, my cousin had a girl, the Sparks have a boy with some wild ass hair, my fellow Snookie lover Chelsea & Josh welcomed a child into the world and I am sure I am missing some others. Even my fellow beer soft drinking buddy RJ got something in the water in Mexico and is going to welcome into the world another girl in mid May. That puts more on the line up to help wipe our asses when we get old so kids consider yourself on the Carl Lipbalm Scholarship List since we don’t have kids.

We got to see some really cool shit ish this year too. Have you ever seen 30 inches of Snow? Yea us neither, it was AMAZING! We got to see a guy from Long Island play at Madison Square Garden by the name of William Martin Joel who is the consummate performer. We saw a little America’s Cup Boat Race and even though we didn’t understand it, I hear the US team kicked the shit out of the other teams. I heard that they even said “Bring on Bama” between champagne chugs. I got to finally meet one of my top 5 Chefs when I got the book signed for Ms. Cat Dresser Upper in Dumbo. And we even got some Pool Time in Wantaugh with some friends of ours.

We did some great eating this past year. No I am not going to rehash the trips to Peter Lugar, Blue Hill at Stone Barns, Delmonico, Per Se, or some of those other fancy joints. I am going to talk about some good ole Memphis BBQ that we had at The Boogie Down BBQ in the Bronx with some Memphis Pitmasters. It was a good time this year and we didn’t even have to get another script of Lipitor.

2016 brought us some great friendships that blossomed over this year. I am not going to go over the names because it may confuse you aka THE ASIAN FIREMAN isn’t really ASIAN folks but you know who you are.

Lastly, we survived living on this rock for one year. We Look Back and it has blown by. We look forward to what 2017 brings us. I certainly appreciate the readers and the comments that you have said either on this thing, Facebook or in person. This worthless dibble gives me a chance to categorize and verbalize what is going on in our life. For those of you who got the chance to come visit us we appreciate it and hope to see some more of you this year. 535 square feet isn’t that bad folks, I promise.

Ok, so here are some pictures that probably didn’t make the posts but are funny to say the least.

img_5528Made the trip into Memphis in September and ran into T-Rex’s daddy and LVD. Good Times on South Main.

img_1892Sober as New Orleans Judges. At least Tucker got the smart idea to wear glasses. My dumbass have them on my head.

IMG_1902.JPGPay no attention to Mrs. Trumpet’s cans. This was right before the Grand Rapids Po-Po came by and told us “Creepy Old People” to go inside. I think they were afraid we would break a hip.

img_2045Attention Single Irish Men of Manhattan. This one is making her virgin trip to Manhattan in early April. No she won’t be wearing the monogram tank top, I know that this ‘ish’ don’t fly here.

img_2393Took LZ to the floor of the Stock Exchange because she pretty much saved my ass during my RSP days. Told her about the unwritten rule that on your first visit if the market closes up then you will have good luck for the year. By the way – ask her who is kicking arse in ticket sales to tourists in the Garment District.

img_5539Flew up one of our dog sitters when we went to Belize because a flight was cheaper than boarding them in the UES.

img_1603Maya – “No I am good, I am going to stay here with all those drunk eye-talians around”

img_1757Did you know that people come to New York for their vacation just to sit on line for the ‘chance’ they get a ticket for Hamilton. #poorbastards

img_01212016 was the year of the Coffee Drink! Or as Rock-Mo calls it “that coffee drink with the green stuff on it.”

img_1820I have to admit that the Garden is a pretty fucking cool venue.

img_1659Brother Joel McGraw, FSC wasn’t lying when he made us pray to Our Lady of Victory

img_5537Carbunkle Trumpet, no matter how famous you are with your blog you will never be as famous as this dog. This dog is UGA, the mascot for The University of Georgia Bulldogs.

img_1500My first celeb sighting in the West Village and who is it? Effin Anne Burrell.

Happy New Year, if 2016 wasn’t the best for you then I hope that 2017 is you year. Me, I plan on killing it; professionally, personally and in dive bar conquests.

 

 

 

 

 

Dead Elvis Week 2010

A couple of years ago I was told that if you ever wanted to forecast the weather for the future just know that the coldest day in Memphis would be the day that the Liberty Bowl is played and the hottest would be Dead Elvis Week. Well Mother Nature came through again as it was hotter than 2 rats screwing in a wool sock this year. I still to this day recall the day that I found out that Elvis had died as I was over at a friends house when I found out, said “Wow” then went back to watching Hogan’s Heroes. Over the years I have mellowed and actually look forward to ‘Dead Elvis Week’ as the crowd watching is at an all time peak. Even though it was only the 33rd anniversary of his death the crowd was pretty good and I got to cross another ETA (Elvis Tribute Artist) off my list as I got a pic with Elvis Patel. Ok on to the pics;

Tears are flowing down my face as I get to the “Hallowed Ground”
Yes we tailgate for the Candle Light Vigil (who doesn’t?)
Decked out in her finest Elvis wear!
Even Auntie Terry wanted in on some Candle Light Vigil
Training em early
What is a Vigil w/o some EP Shades?
Good thing we didn’t have a minister or I would have a new daddy (but wait????)
Barbie and her Boys
Poor Robin she didn’t get to stay and play with us.
That Red dot in the far distance would be Ford who thought this was a Micheal Jackson tribute
Even Lilly wanted in some ETA action!
Kinda Creepy ya know?
Oh Hell Yes I got to have a pic with Indian (dot, not feather) Elvis!
I could have sworn that I talked to him last week when I called computer support
Fancy Candle Holder
Elvis has his own wheels
Damn Barbie, can you get any farther away?
See ya got to get up close for the full effect
Fancy footwear
Oh Hell yes he broke them out!
Still trying figure out Shobo’s camera
The kid really wasn’t into it but doesn’t dad look like Gene Simmons?
They were from Sweden
This could have been Gene Simmons minus the face lifts
Got to love the tributes on the street
If I didn’t know any better that could have been a baby CBT ya know?
Pretty neat shrine
Can I get an AMEN?
Looks like the grave is going to have some flowers added to it by another ETA
Thanks to Memphis in May I knew that this was the Chilean Flag and this South American wasn’t from Texas

TO THE KING!

Who doesn’t dream about this time of the year?

You may recall my previous blog post about my letter to some magazine owner who said that Memphis was a miserable city to live in. Well Mr Forbes, as someone I overheard today at the MIM Music festival Press conference he said you could go to that warm place. I recalled that today was the press conference announcing the line up so I texted my fellow iced tea drinker Doctor King and asked if he was attending. Since I have a little free time on my hands I figured I would go check it out and get my mind set right for a great next 90 days.
I have some friends of mine (no I don’t pay them to be my friend) are going on vacation in mid April to celebrate a birthday and they asked if Mrs CBT and I wanted to come with them and I told them that this is the best part of the year to live in 38103. Anyway as we were sitting there listening to the Line_Up I could almost hear the bitching on Twitter about the ‘same ole, same ole’ acts and I am sorry for 65 bucks you get 3 days of music, hilarious people watching, and a chance to wear your mud gear. If you want big name bands then go to Bonnaroo or Jazz fest, I will just walk out my front door to my outdoor music theater called Tom Lee Park and not have to drive home!
Anyway the announcement day is the kick off to the spring as we get to look forward to the following events

  1. Music Fest line up is announced. Buy your tickets now because once it is May the deal goes away!
  2. Major League Baseball and the Memphis Red Birds start play in Autozone Park
  3. Some Jackasses 40th Birthday Celebration this year.
  4. Patios start to open on Beale Street and the term Sunday-Funday really takes effect
  5. South Main Wingfest
  6. Porter Leath Crawfish Festival
  7. The Wine Race (Hey KLC Man you want to come down for it?)
  8. Memphis in May Music Fest on the banks of the Mississippi River
  9. Memphis in May BBQ Festival again on the banks of the Mississippi River
  10. Memphis in May Sunset Symphony also on the banks of the Mississippi River
  11. Holy Rosary Italian Festival in East Memphis

See what I mean we got a lot going on in the next 90 days and they really don’t get rocking till the first of April!

George Hunt talking about this years MIM painting and print

What is there not to love about nacho chips, cheese, pulled pork and some BBQ sauce on it?
Autozone Park opening weekend

Here is some Jackasses Birthday cake from last year thanks to Courtney S.
The cake is in the shape of some ‘crappy island’ that I have visited once or twice.
There is only one Coon Arse on our team but the rest of us know how to drink some beer so that counts!

See what I mean?

That is a fun one day party I must say!

Ah the weather warms some more the Beale Street doesn’t smell of beer and urine but Wine!

Look at the mad skills of Doctor Turney

Man Down, Man Down

Gates open for Music Fest at 5PM and this girl is heaving in a trash can at 5:20

That damn Swine Flu

Oh I so love some Carnival Nachos

Yep we had a little rain

But we also had Snoop in the Hizouse so that was ok

Mud boots – 125.00
Crappy Khaki pants – 30.00
Patagonia Monsoon Rain Jacket – 150.00
Waterproof Tilly Hat – 50.00
Not being cold or have water drip down my back – PRICELESS!
And on Monday the boots rested

The rains went away and then on the 3rd weekend let there be Pork

And the English come too!

Not just your average fire up a smoker and let’s have some fun contest, they are serious!

Let’s see we have had Music, Rain and the Pork then it must be time for the German bomber planes! Sunset Symphony

Then ending the 90 days of fun and festival is when everyone slaps a vowel on the end of their name and becomes Eye-Talian

Dude you missed the Southaven Spring Fest by 45 days ago

We may not have won in gravy but we did win where it counted – Best Happy Hour drink

And the trophy is proudly hung at the joint where the inspiration was given
Now Mr. Forbes what was that about Memphis being Miserable?
TTK and Bring on the Carnie Food!

Who doesn’t dream about this time of the year?

You may recall my previous blog post about my letter to some magazine owner who said that Memphis was a miserable city to live in. Well Mr Forbes, as someone I overheard today at the MIM Music festival Press conference he said you could go to that warm place. I recalled that today was the press conference announcing the line up so I texted my fellow iced tea drinker Doctor King and asked if he was attending. Since I have a little free time on my hands I figured I would go check it out and get my mind set right for a great next 90 days.
I have some friends of mine (no I don’t pay them to be my friend) are going on vacation in mid April to celebrate a birthday and they asked if Mrs CBT and I wanted to come with them and I told them that this is the best part of the year to live in 38103. Anyway as we were sitting there listening to the Line_Up I could almost hear the bitching on Twitter about the ‘same ole, same ole’ acts and I am sorry for 65 bucks you get 3 days of music, hilarious people watching, and a chance to wear your mud gear. If you want big name bands then go to Bonnaroo or Jazz fest, I will just walk out my front door to my outdoor music theater called Tom Lee Park and not have to drive home!
Anyway the announcement day is the kick off to the spring as we get to look forward to the following events

  1. Music Fest line up is announced. Buy your tickets now because once it is May the deal goes away!
  2. Major League Baseball and the Memphis Red Birds start play in Autozone Park
  3. Some Jackasses 40th Birthday Celebration this year.
  4. Patios start to open on Beale Street and the term Sunday-Funday really takes effect
  5. South Main Wingfest
  6. Porter Leath Crawfish Festival
  7. The Wine Race (Hey KLC Man you want to come down for it?)
  8. Memphis in May Music Fest on the banks of the Mississippi River
  9. Memphis in May BBQ Festival again on the banks of the Mississippi River
  10. Memphis in May Sunset Symphony also on the banks of the Mississippi River
  11. Holy Rosary Italian Festival in East Memphis

See what I mean we got a lot going on in the next 90 days and they really don’t get rocking till the first of April!

George Hunt talking about this years MIM painting and print

What is there not to love about nacho chips, cheese, pulled pork and some BBQ sauce on it?
Autozone Park opening weekend

Here is some Jackasses Birthday cake from last year thanks to Courtney S.
The cake is in the shape of some ‘crappy island’ that I have visited once or twice.
There is only one Coon Arse on our team but the rest of us know how to drink some beer so that counts!

See what I mean?

That is a fun one day party I must say!

Ah the weather warms some more the Beale Street doesn’t smell of beer and urine but Wine!

Look at the mad skills of Doctor Turney

Man Down, Man Down

Gates open for Music Fest at 5PM and this girl is heaving in a trash can at 5:20

That damn Swine Flu

Oh I so love some Carnival Nachos

Yep we had a little rain

But we also had Snoop in the Hizouse so that was ok

Mud boots – 125.00
Crappy Khaki pants – 30.00
Patagonia Monsoon Rain Jacket – 150.00
Waterproof Tilly Hat – 50.00
Not being cold or have water drip down my back – PRICELESS!
And on Monday the boots rested

The rains went away and then on the 3rd weekend let there be Pork

And the English come too!

Not just your average fire up a smoker and let’s have some fun contest, they are serious!

Let’s see we have had Music, Rain and the Pork then it must be time for the German bomber planes! Sunset Symphony

Then ending the 90 days of fun and festival is when everyone slaps a vowel on the end of their name and becomes Eye-Talian

Dude you missed the Southaven Spring Fest by 45 days ago

We may not have won in gravy but we did win where it counted – Best Happy Hour drink

And the trophy is proudly hung at the joint where the inspiration was given
Now Mr. Forbes what was that about Memphis being Miserable?
TTK and Bring on the Carnie Food!

An Open Letter to Steve Forbes

Mr. Steve Forbes
Forbes Magazine
60 5th Avenue
New York, NY 10011

Dear Mr. Forbes,

On the request from my city mayor, The Honorable A.C. Wharton, I also would like to invite you to make a trip to come visit our fair city as I think that you will find that Memphis is far from being labeled a ‘miserable’ city. During the Olympics I recalled a TV commercial for the city of Vancouver that the general tag line was “you have to come see it” and I challenge you to come experience what Memphis and the Mid South has to offer. Not only as a lifelong Memphian but also as a 4th generation Italian immigrant family who has called Memphis home I could not imagine living anywhere else in the US as Memphis is my home.
The city of Memphis has great history that is anything than ‘miserable’ from the days of cotton trading on Front Street to the various sections of cities where immigrant families lived such as the pinch district and the Evergreen district. It was here that these good families led to the start companies called Piggly Wiggly, Holiday Inn, Ronco Pasta, and even a little package freight company called Federal Express.
I know that Mayor Wharton mentioned in his letter the various events that he visited in our city and some great upcoming grand openings that we are excited for but those just scratch the surface. Memphis does have a great history of great food, music and sporting teams but I have another reason that you need to come visit my city. In my opinion a city is nothing without its people and here is where I believe you may want to re-consider Memphis being ‘miserable’.
Last month the weather in Memphis got the unseasonably Arctic cold blast that prompted the mayor and government officials to instruct our utilities companies to re-connect utilities to any home that was cut off due to non-payment regardless of what they owed the utility company. Mr. Forbes I encourage you to go visit with those who got their utilities turned back on during this time of crisis and see what they have to think of our ‘miserable’ city.
Please by all means go by the Ronald McDonald House, Target House and St. Jude and visit with families who have been uprooted from across the world or across the country while their child seeks medical treatment and ask them what they think of the people of Memphis and the wonderful staffs at these institutions.
During the aforementioned cold snap it was a priority to get our homeless out of the elements and even some ‘warming tents’ were erected to aide them. Again ask them if they thought the people who were helping them if they were living in a ‘miserable’ city.
The next person that I would like for you to meet is Ms Suhair Lauck who happens to own “The Little Tea Shop” restaurant downtown and I encourage you to debate that question of Memphis being a ‘miserable’ city. Heck I tell you what I will even buy your lunch if you can convince this wonderful woman that she lives in a miserable city because I think you may be mistaken and will lose the debate. Oh and while you are there you have to try the cornbread sticks with your lunch to see if you have had any better. I doubt it!
Lastly I would love for you to come to Memphis, visit various parts of our city and just simply walk up to a complete stranger and ask them what they think of our city because I think that you would be amazed that your report listing Memphis as a ‘miserable’ city may be wrong.
So I encourage you to come see the Peabody ducks, go visit the Jungle Room, eat some ribs, walk down Beale Street but while you are seeing the sites please ask around on what Memphians think of our fair city, I think you will be amazed.

Sincerely,

That guy who calls himself Carbunkle Trumpet on his blog