The Carl Lipbalm Memorial Scholarship

The Carl Lipbalm Memorial Scholarship Winner Comes to The Big Apple

Remember back 2 years ago when we had one of our niece’s come up to celebrate her graduating from High School. So we had a cousin aka “Love Bug” come up this past weekend. The agenda for the past weekend was dinner Thursday Night. Bum around town on Friday and have dinner with the other cousin in downtown Brooklyn. Saturday a play was in order and then we would figure out dinner.

We really had a great time spending the weekend with “Love Bug” and naturally watching her experience a lot of things that we now take for granted up here. “Love Bug” had a blast and she found out a couple of things; Raw Oysters on the half shell are a hard no. Breaded and Baked Clams ala Patrizias of Brooklyn are also frowned upon. But I am happy to report that escargot from Blue Ribbon gets a pass and she loved street meat from The Hallal Guys.

The weekend was fun and we had a blast with her. Thanks to her momma and daddy for letting us hang out with her.

IMG_4154Love Bug Takes on The Big Apple and Times Square!

IMG_4155The closest that I made it to a Broadway musical! That is Mary Louise’s job!

IMG_4156All kidding aside Times Square is still pretty cool and has an undeniable energy about it!

IMG_4163Getting a slice at Joe’s Pizza! Can’t get anymore Authentic NYC than this!

IMG_4166Here Love Bug is about to take down here first Raw Oyster!

IMG_4167Unfortunately I don’t have the picture of her reaction when she put the ‘snot like’ oyster in her mouth. She was a good sport by trying it! I mean they don’t have an abundance of saltwater oysters in Northwest Arkansas!

IMG_4174“Wait we are going to an intersection in Midtown Manhattan to have lunch?”

IMG_4176We made our way downtown by Trinity Church/The 911 Church and she found some old dead guy’s grave. For those of you wondering – the white grave is Alexander Hamilton’s grave. I hear he had a play written about him.

IMG_4184Wait it isn’t my birthday……

IMG_4183Let us Celebrate “Love Bug’s” fake birthday!

IMG_4187The Traffic here really bites you know Uncle CBT? Why didn’t you get me an Uber for Helicopters?

IMG_4190I can see my house from here! Sadly the day we went to the roof it was overcast but I am sure that some good snaps were taken.

Come back anytime Love Bug but make sure that you don’t tell your little brother about what goes on in New York. Next year is his turn.

Pictures of the Week – Labor Day Shenanigans

Sorry I haven’t been doing my job lately, the abbreviated week and the start of school has kept us busy. Hope everyone is happy that College Football is back in the swing of things and that now the NFL is about to start back up too. Here are some pics from this past Labor Day weekend.

IMG_4113I think that if I didn’t wear my traditional Seersucker Suit on the last Friday of the summer my team would revolt.

IMG_4119I wonder what Asshole lives in this eyesore. View from the Murphrank’s roofdeck.

IMG_4122Believe it or not we didn’t stage this picture. Maya could have been trying to cuddle up with Rocky because she was afraid of the humans. I think this was when Bobcat decided to ‘take a nap’!

IMG_4129She is as happy as a cat in a canary store.

IMG_4130“Oh sure you can sit on the throne and wear those funny crowns and let you believe that you are the boss of us.” #saidnooneever

IMG_4110BEFORE YOU START JUDGING ME – Not one bottle of this is mine (I only buy half gallons & Mary Louise’s maintenance wine comes in standard bottles) but I wondered if the old drunk South Bluff Neighbor moved into our building.

IMG_0505First Day of School for The Little Bastid! He is growing so tall!

IMG_4149We are those people who now take our dog to bars. In New York if a bar doesn’t serve food then dogs are welcome. Maya likes the bars in Boerum Hill.

This weekend we have The Carl Lipbalm Memorial Caddy Scholarship winner in town so I am sure we will have some fun pics to share with you next week. Keep it light.

Start Spreading the News! 1 Year on That Island Called Manhattan

So welcome back, for those keeping score at home yes today is the official 1-year anniversary of us becoming New Yorkers. It was on this day a year ago that we received keys to our very own 535 square foot apartment in the Upper East Side of Manhattan. Yesterday we hit on 4 topics out of 8 so today we finish up the series. Below are the 4 subtopics that we shall discuss today. They are;

  • Shit we found pretty difficult to do here as compared to living in Memphis
  • Famous people we saw
  • Recommendations for visitors to NYC that is not on a top 10 “must-do” list
  • Stuff we still have yet to do and or see or eat (again skip this one A.T.)

Shit we found pretty difficult to do here as compared to living in Memphis.

  • Right out of the gate let’s talk about the cost of goods here. Do I wish that my beer was cheaper down the street as compared to in other boroughs? You damned right but hey in order to play you have to pay.
  • Since we got rid of our cars we are now frequent users of Mass Transportation. Sure it may smell on the 6 train but it beats sitting in traffic on street level. Case in point, our trip to see the Asian Fireman in Woodlawn. According to Google Maps it should take 20-30 min via car. We don’t want to pay $50 each trip via a cab or Uber so we take Metro North and walk it.
  • Here is one that Nova and KLC Man are going to snicker at me since I used to bust balls about the snow in Canada or in Maine. Recall when I got 30 inches in January? Yep I was glad that I hauled ass back to Memphis on Tuesday because that stuff is a mess to walk around in.
  • Here is where I took the most crap from my Memphis friends and fellow Hog Fans. I think I roughly watched 5 hours total of College Football up here this past year. Next year I promise to get on the ball.
  • Ever want to go crazy during a shopping spree and then realize you have to schlep that shit home? Welcome to Zabars.

Famous People we saw in NYC this past year

  • With my job I get to travel all over the borough of Manhattan so I have a sizable advantage over Mrs. CBT. That and she has a huge Non-Disclosure because she can’t divulge who she saw at her work. But here is a short list of people we saw this year.
  • Al Roker & Larry David (on the same day!)
  • I saw Piper and Boo from O.I.T.N.B. leaving Soul Cycle in the West Village.
  • We both saw a former West Memphian and now New Yorker Damien Echols give a talk about Karma.
  • I got to run into a guy who runs a pretty successful joint in Harlem at 125th street by the name of Red Rooster.
  • I saw Carmella from the Soprano’s, Drea de Matteo from the Soprano’s, and hopefully I get to meet Uncle June.
  • I saw Dave Navarro walking down the street in SoHo.
  • Bourdain – Yep, saw him too!
  • Then I made a trip to Dumbo to but a book for A.T.
  • And lastly I met a Puerto Rican playwright who penned a play about some guy who is on the $10 bill.

Recommendations for visitors to NYC that is not on a top 10 “must-do” list

  • But first before I get going on this let me please remind visitors to our new adopted city  the rules about visiting NYC
  • On Friday’s in the Summer you have to go to the roof of  The Met to see the city and drink expensive beer
  • Got a hankering for some good street meat and corn dogs? I am sure you can find a great  Street Festivals
  • So people ask me why we go out on Sunday’s to the Dive Bar’s well we appreciate a good establishment where you can let your hair down. Or in this case eat a hot dog and drink beer at Rudy’s on 9th Avenue
  • Find yourself near Union Square? Go see John at  Old Town Tavern and tell him we sent you.
  • My new favorite bar when near Times Square and KILLER Juke Box can be found on W44th  Jimmy’s Corner
  • And don’t forget about when we had AK in town for the Carl Lipbalm Scholarship *Disclaimer – I still cringe when I walk by a Forever 21 store!
  • Other than that, you are on your own. Or if you want to grab a cheap beer. Shoot me a text.

Stuff we still have yet to do and or see or eat (again skip this one A.T.)

  • We celebrate our 20th Anniversary in May so we want to go somewhere cool. I have always had Columbia on my radar.
  • We want to see the USS Intrepid on the West Side
  • Mrs. CBT wants to see more plays. Anyone want to come help a brother out?
  • We have tickets to see Hamilton in March.
  • Mrs. CBT is starting school at NYU so she wants to do well there.
  • Jimmy  Fallon is on our short list.
  • See the Rest of the Museums.
  • We are going to let our membership at the Met lapse and will join the Central Park Conservancy this year.
  • Brooklyn Fare is high on the Foodie list. Same goes for Daniel. Anybody want to join us? I am looking at you A.T.
  • We want to continue our relationships with the great friends that we have made up here and keep the ties that we have in Memphis. We really are blessed with some great friends.

So there it is. 1 year living in Manhattan and we have loved each and every day of this. I do plan on putting together a retrospect post but that will have to happen next week. I have had many people from Memphis ask me if we like living up here. My comment is always “You really are comparing an apple to an orange. Memphis will always be our home and our family but New York is our Mind, Body, and our Soul.”

Thank you for reading this worthless dribble for the past year. I appreciate the likes on FB, the comments and the emails. I enjoy the comments so keep them coming!

Carbunkle “Robo” Trumpet

 

 

The Carl Lipbalm Memorial Scholarship

As you know, the only real children that Mrs. Trumpet and I have are two monkey heads of poodles. There is also the invisible child that appears on my FB feed on the first and last day of school but that is a different story. We have 4 nieces and nephews and a ton of cousins over on my side of the family (what can you expect, I am eye-Talian!) So back in the winter of this year we decided to bring the oldest niece to town for a weekend of sightseeing and exploring NYC as a graduation gift since we didn’t really get her a proper gift.  This conversation naturally led to “why don’t we bring up all the nieces/nephews and cousins for a weekend after they graduate?” We start to jot the name and graduation years on a bar napkin piece of scrap paper and we come up with 9 kids! Oh and we have a set of twins in there too but the way we look at is that we will have someone to wipe our asses when we get old!

Hence “The Carl Lipbalm Memorial Scholarship” was born. Thankfully none of my cousins read this worthless dribble of a blog and if you do,  I know that you can’t tell your parents because they would ground you for the rest of your natural born life! CBT has been known to throw out an F-Bomb and just you wait till I till I tell you about the Douche Nozzle I met on the Ferry. Before the nieces/nephews and cousins start packing their bags for the Big Apple we do have some common ground rules that are in place. They are as follows;

  • The recipient of The Carl Lipbalm Memorial Scholarship (TCLMS) must graduate from an accredited high school and not from a corrections facility.
  • The invitation is only open to the recipient and not a boy/girlfriend. We don’t need any awkward touching going on our couch that weekend.
  • Can’t make fun of the size of our apartment unless you pay for a weekend at The Surrey on E76th and then mock all you want.
  • If CBT is accompanying you as a chaperone then you get one (1) hour total of shopping per day. Or find a shopping venue that is close to a bar, in that case have at it!
  • You are not allowed to get any additional tattoos, piercings, body modifications and or transdermal pieces installed while you are under our care.
  • The weekend being either Thursday evening/Friday morning and ends by Sunday early evening. CBT & Mrs. CBT will need some ‘alone time’ with a bottle of vodka to decompress.

So with that this year’s first recipient was AK from South East Missouri. AK came in screaming hot on Thursday as she got to enjoy a side trip to our nations capital since American didn’t want to fly direct to LGA on Thursday. I do have to say it is fun watching someone try to process things that you are now taking for granted.  I gave her the ground rules for walking and the streets of Manhattan (DON’T FUCKING TEXT & WALK) and she did a good job on that but it was fun watching her almost run into mailboxes staring at the tops of the buildings.

I took AK around on Friday morning for a couple hours as Mrs. Trumpet had a meeting she had to attend. I schlepped her by St. Patrick’s Cathedral, The Rocks, Jimmy Fallon’s Sign, Diamond District, Times Square, Hamilton’s Theater, Bryant Park and she got to experience her first Bagel and Subway ride. Later that evening she went to see Wicked with Mrs. Trumpet while I held court at the Cigar Inn.

Saturday we had a full day with the Double Decker Bus to downtown, trip to see the Bull, Wall Street, Federal Reserve, Statue of Liberty, Chinatown, Little Italy, shopping in SoHo and she ate a Woody Allen from the Carnegie Deli. I am figuring she had good time on her trip. I mean she took 208 pictures that got uploaded to Facebook and I don’t know how many selfies were taken!!  I am kidding, we had a good time with AK and we hope you use your TCLMS as an experience that you will appreciate crazy people who yell at the top of their lungs on the Staten Island Ferry.

IMG_1674Times Square & AK!

IMG_1673Here she is at the guy who we never can stay awake for at night.

IMG_1675Here is where Uncle Dan’s butt is starting to twitch!

IMG_1677“Can I get 2 Two by Fours?” Bartender – “Sure, you want the wrapper with it?”

IMG_1662But first let me take a selfie!

IMG_1671This is what made my butt twitch!

IMG_1676Woody Allen from the Carnegie Deli!

IMG_1667Here I am doing it again!

IMG_1661That is the kind of Sailboat I want to be on! Do they have a Kettle One Sailboat?

IMG_1665I bet they are not sober on that boat at all!

IMG_1682We hit a TON of spots in 3 days. No wonder my legs ache.

And for those of you wondering, no you cannot be a niece/nephew or cousin of ours!