Weekend fun

Spring Like Weather and Then Hurricane Tucker

Hope you guys had a fun weekend. I am sure that there a some of you in Memphis who didn’t heed my warning on Twitter and blew it out hard at Rajun Cajun yesterday. Here is to hoping that your hands aren’t shaking too bad as you read this. Finally the weather broke on Friday and Saturday till 5PM. It actually was ‘bead of sweat’ warm on Friday as I joked with the doormen that people will probably be bitching about the heat. Saturday didn’t disappoint until the front moved in and it got chilly on our ride home from Brooklyn.

Friday I got home and we had our Midwestern friend Tucker heading in from New Jersey. She was across the Hudson for work training and decided to spend an evening with us and fly out Saturday. This was just fine with us as we knew we were in for a full fun night. Since she was rolling into town I was able to find 3 tickets to Losers Lounge Friday night as they were giving tribute to “The Last Waltz.” We met up at the apartment and then had dinner at a Geoffrey Zakarian joint in Midtown East.

If you have been paying attention you will know that I have been doing some juice cleansing and clean eating. Well that shit came to a tumbling halt on Friday as I switched over from green grass and tree bark drinks to Potato based liquid and what the hell. I got me a GZ burger and added bacon to it too! The show didn’t disappoint and the post show drinks were good (?) and before Tucker’s hair could deflate she was headed to LGA.

Saturday we went over to Downtown Brooklyn to check out apartments and had drinks with lady barrister since Mr. 3 First Names was out of town.  Walking into The Commissioner was warm and sunny and temps in the 70’s. Walking out the bottom dropped out of the bottom and it was around 50 with a good wind. Thankfully we had some jet fuel in us but that walk to the subway was brutal!

IMG_2970Sadly I never saw the movie and the second act didn’t dissapoint

IMG_2968Yep all the favorite were preforming tonight

IMG_2965But first lets take a selfie!

IMG_2980Yep he did a Van Morrison song and for those of you wondering that is the same person who sang George Micheal

national-gallery-images-7The interior of GZ’s National – Nice dinner

untitledPretty much it starts out nice here then goes downhill very soon afterwards!

IMG_2986More on this later but we went to Downtown Brooklyn on Saturday

 

Thanks for a fun weekend Tucker and hope everyone behaved this weekend. Its going to be a shitty couple of days up here weather wise.

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“Take me out to the ball game, take me out to the crowd….”

Buy me some Peanuts and Cracker Jacks who the Feck am I kidding buy me some friggin long underwear and call my ass in May for tickets opening weekend in the North sucks! Yep yours truly attended a baseball game north of 160th street during opening weekend and it was cold to say the least.  The tourist bus company that I work for has 4 seats in Yankees stadium for all 81 home baseball games. I have to share the hosting of the tickets with the other ticket sales reps and naturally because I am low man on the totem pole I don’t get first dibs. On Thursday the word came down that there were some seats open for Sunday’s game because LJZ was nice enough to take a day off from her residency at Yankees stadium so I raised my hand.

What I should have done first is look at the friggin weather report. Ah, it was at least sunny and not raining but albeit it was kind of chilly. The game was fun, the Yankees went up 5-0 in the first and we were spitting distance from Aaron Judge and of course….beer so it was a good day. The clients enjoyed themselves and after some extra innings at the Yankee Tavern we headed home for the evening.

IMG_2934Puffy Coats being worn in a baseball game. Friggin Puffy Coats!

IMG_2935“Not my seat or my beer” No Man Ever

IMG_2938That boy is a grown ass man! I can’t wait for the Cubs to play them in the World Series this year! It is going to be fun!

Have a good day and go support your local baseball team. It is supposed to mean that spring and summer is here.

 

What is a Trip to Brooklyn without visiting Smorgasburg?

So we loaded up the double wide stroller for the dogs. I got my Man-Bun looking tight and we headed across the bridge to visit Prospect Park. Not sure what I am talking about? Consider a food truck rodeo/street fair but it is only food vendors selling their offerings.

Oh and it was probably 100 tents set up in the middle of Prospect Park! One could bring the family, a blanket, smuggle in a bottle of wine (not that I condone that type of behavior) and spend the afternoon eating their asses off. We walked around the circle once and determined that we needed some grease in our systems considering last nights debauchery. What is neat about Smorgasburg is that they are pretty vigilant about recycling and trash. Nobody sells plastic bottled water, they have paper cups instead. No Styrofoam containers, all the food containers are either that hard paper boxes or I saw a lot of people drinking drinks out of pineapples which was cool.

Probably the wildest was the native country food offerings here. Sadly there wasn’t a Pronto Pup or Funnel Cake vendor in the mix but we saw lots of food stalls that you see typically on Anthony Bourdain or Andrew Zimmer travel shows. Next time when I am not suffering from MPH we will have to give them a whirl.

IMG_2889Wait, you have a double double with Caramelized Onions on a flat top griddle? You guys ever been to Memphis? There is a joint at the corner of GE Patterson and Main….

IMG_2894Like I have always said, if you see a huge ass line for a food vendor you go stand in it because it has to be good.

IMG_2893Its like a Crepe but with Egg, Cheese, Pork and Green Onions

IMG_2892Very interesting to see them make this. Hey Gardo and Boo you guys are over there what is the deal with this and why is it so popular?

IMG_2895Hey I know what that means! Melted Cheese on things

IMG_2896If the Damn Neighbor were here she would have put up a chair right here and given them a credit card saying “Keep it coming!”

IMG_2891What a lovely day for a picnic I could only imagine how Maddy and Maya would have hated it.

IMG_2890Rolling Luggage at Smorgasburg? You guys are serious about eating some food aren’t you?

I would be remiss to say that the longest lines were for BBQ tents. I guess they love that Brooklyn BBQ scene up here.

Happy Easter Spud! CBT, Mrs. CBT, EGP & Cali-SAB went to Easter Service.

Some of you are expecting an off the cuff comment but let me stop you right now. We went to Catholic Mass on Easter Sunday. Let me say it again for those of you who are in disbelief….. Carbunkle Trumpet Esquire attended High Catholic Mass on Easter Sunday.

What I have failed to mention to you for those of you who are still reading and not in complete disbelief please follow along… We attended church at The Church of St. John Nepomucene down the street from where we live. Were you not raised Roman Catholic or have Brother Joel McGraw for class let me help you again. John Neopomucene was the patron of Czechoslovakia, where he is invoked against floods and against slander.

No big deal right? Well make sure you don’t slurp your morning coffee for this next paragraph. The High Mass that EGP, Cali-SAB, Mrs. Trumpet and I attended was said in the Slavic language. Yes for an hour and a half we sat in full Catholic Mass not knowing a spoken word that was being said. Put it this way, EGP leans over in my direction and mouth whispers; Whisky Tango Foxtrot!  Regardless of the fact that we didn’t know any of the responses or were too petrified we did find out that we were in the company of the Arch Bishop who led this service.

Yep we had the Big Brass for the Slovakian Mass. What did you do on Easter Sunday?

197A5221-Version-3Here is the Church on First Avenue at 66th Street. Didn’t THIS BLOG POST back when we were on our way to the bar and ran into The Pope. This happens to be the church we stood by when he rolled by.

HOLYWEEKNote the Easter Sunday, April 1st service and see the 10:15 offering…Yep Full Slovak Mass I guess we should have paid attention to that.

IMG_9072But we saw The Pope almost 2.5 years ago from this church and walked by it a million times to go see Andi, Jo and Ryan at Baker Street and never did we think to take a look at the mass times….

 

Happy Easter!

New Joints in San Pedro

As I reported EARLIER we visited some new joints while down in San Pedro. Also on our visit we got to see some new improvements to some of the ones that we saw when we were down 2 years ago at Easter. I hear the grumblings of people all the time; I miss the hand drawn ferry, it used to be much quieter, so much traffic, and so on. Hell, the bad thing is that the majority of that comes from the bitter Ex-Pats who we hung out with on the Poker Run north of the bridge on Saturday.

Sorry Folks but San Pedro back in the early 1980’s will never happen again. Change is inevitable and it can either be good change or bad change. I am not going to open this up for discussion but personally I think the change on San Pedro is for the good. More people means more money, more jobs, more housing, and more infrastructure. Sure I miss the bumpy ass roads north of the island but do you know how nice it is to make it to Truck Stop without having to stop to re-adjust your balls?

I have friends on the island who tell me that business is booming and people are wishing to buy property on the island all the time. I say we should welcome them with open arms because with that extra cash flow maybe someone can put in a full time hospital or clinic on the island. It isn’t a big secret that “One should never get sick in Belize” so maybe this will be the next big thing. I still recall when there wasn’t a hyperbaric chamber on the island and this when there were dive shops going up every day.

IMG_2705Here is Crocs north of the bridge. A huge 3 story sport bar/restaurant that has killer views of the back of the island.

IMG_2694I have to hand it to the owners and investors of The Truck Stop. Huge gamble but they are printing money hand over fist. Great concept (shipping containers aka food stations) and since our last visit they added 2 more containers, built a stage and even have a friggin pool out back. Staff is wonderful and we wish them the best. They really are a great addition to the island.

IMG_2695Family Feud Night!

IMG_2696Picnic Tables in the middle and plenty of seating.

IMG_2697Great family place to bring the kids too!

IMG_2725The old Standby – Estel’s by the sea. They added a bigger bar (this space used to be Charlie’s dining room table) and the staff as always is top notch!

IMG_2704Talk about re-purposing something in San Pedro – This is the urinal from Croc’s

IMG_2702I snicker each time!

IMG_2713Like a Phoenix re-birth from the ashes The Palapa Bar is back! Here we are working our poor friend Rony to death and also twisting the jealousy knife into the backs of Bill and Roxanne a tad too!

IMG_2718What you can’t really see is the Stage 2 Sunburn on this poor girl or that she did a pretty good job belting out some Janis Joplin

IMG_2706One thing that should always stay the same is the shrimp sticks at Blue Water Grill. Still as good as the first time we had them!

IMG_6605That and Kitty, she never changes!

IMG_2693There is always one couple in the bunch!

Not pictured: Wayo’s New Joint over the water or a bunch of new places north of the bridge. Including…….wait for it………an Irish Bar! Don’t the friggin Irish have enough places to drink already?

Oy Vey……

*In order to get the full effect this should be read aloud in a Jewish Mother’s accent – “You never take me anywhere, I come home from work, slave away in the kitchen to make your dinner and you never appreciate me.” No Mrs. Trumpet didn’t say it exactly like that but it was along the lines of “we used to always have Super Bowl party plans.” Now before half of you readers start in on my ass with the “Yeah Cheap Ass Carbunkle Trumpet, why don’t you take the little lady out on the town.” We are leaving this Friday for some much-needed warmth and binge drinking so lay off!

We already had some plans going into the Cold Ass Weekend. We were going to see a play that our cousin was working in at her school. And another thing, it is cold as Balls up here, do you know how exhausting that is? Friday afternoon when we both got home we both took a nap and that hasn’t happened in a long time. After our nap we walked up the block to Manhattan Marymount where our cousin AL attends. AL is a fulltime student getting a degree in theater performance and double minor and when she isn’t doing all of that her little butt seeing every Broadway show known to man! She is a good kid and even will keep our Monkey heads when we sneak out of town.

The play was “Punk Rock” written by Simon Stephens and is based 6 student who attend an English Private School. AL told us on the front end that there would be some language and mature content and I am always down for some cursing and ‘awkward touch’ but this was a really good performance. It was dark and what I always appreciate about seeing something like this is that it makes you think afterwards. Hell, even at our dinner on Saturday night we were discussing the play. So thank you AL for the invite and please keep us on line for any future shows.

Saturday morning I had to take the Monkey Heads to the groomers and got some chores done. Earlier in the week Time Out Magazine mentioned that there were still some tickets available for Losers Lounge’s Tribute to Barbara Streisand. Maria was unavailable and because there were a small number of seats available (like right in front of the horns section) it was just me and Mrs. Trumpet. The show was great and as usual Joe and the gang killed it.

Afterwards Mrs. Trumpet and I went big balls and dined at the famed Le Coq Rico or as I called it “a chicken joint.” I will post separately about this joint because one can’t appreciate the meal that we had and I am nearing my 500-word limit.
So which one of you bastards wants to call me out for not taking Mrs. Trumpet out on the town? A play, a concert, a fancy dinner, plenty of good drink… Yeah That’s what I thought!

IMG_2649_LI (2)The Program from the play on Friday night. And until she wins a Tony or turns 21 whichever comes first you don’t need to know her name. We are very proud of her and know that she will be a success.

IMG_2660My view Saturday night at the show. Yeah my right ear is still ringing from this dude’s trumpet but it was a great show.

IMG_2669 (1)The Cast from “Punk Rock” from the program. It is neat knowing that at least 1 if not all will be preforming on Broadway or somewhere similar down the road.

IMG_2668I see that face and can’t stop thinking of “Meet The Fockers”

IMG_2663Sorry Grainbin Girl – Yes this is Chicken Stock Risotto with Shaved Parmigiano Reggiano and Black Truffles. It was decedent and good to the last drop!

Image-1It is always nice to know that Babs “Does Bring Me Flowers” as she sent this to Joe and the band!

So what did you Fuckers do this weekend? You still suffering from “Ring of Fire” from eating too many wings last night watching the Super Bowl?

Pictures of the past weeks –

On a Monday? What gives Carbunkle, you get too juiced like a Ferrari this past weekend and forget to take your foam out and document the shenanigans? Actually it has been kind of boring up here as of late. Friday night we went over and drank wine at a friends house, Saturday we slept in till noon and that night we didn’t do anything. *Disclaimer – I am writing this Sunday morning as the wife and 2 dogs are sleeping* And Sunday we don’t really have any hard core plans other than chilling out on the couch watching the Grammys.

So here are some pictures that I have had on my photo reel for a couple weeks. As you can see it isn’t always fancy dinners and fancy drinks every night. Well I did have happy hour drinks with the Work Wife (the domestic one, not the international one) at Tommy Bahamas on 5th Avenue on Friday.

IMG_2612Coffee or Booze? Only I will know

IMG_2557This is just absurd. They have these cigars (the one on the right) at my Cigar joint. Who in the hell wants to smoke a 8 X 80 cigar. You put that thing in your mouth and you look like you are sucking on a (oh hey, look at the time) *The Ashton Churchill is next to it for scale and size*

IMG_2568We adopted one, we hated being the odd ones out so say hello to Carbunkle Elvis Trumpet Jr! We are kidding, this is the offspring of the Asian Fireman who we will always spoil and be nice to. That way when we get old we can have him wipe our butts.

IMG_2554I think the ambient temperature with the wind-chill outside is close to 5 degrees. Even New Jersey looks nice from inside.

IMG_2541I wonder why I am turning into a Fat Kid.

IMG_2614A K for a fucking stroller? F that! I will just go steal one that is parked outside of all the diners in the Upper East Side. In speaking to Lady Barrister the other night there are a couple outside of the hall in her building.

IMG_2608Rule Number 1 for anyone walking the streets of Manhattan – DO NOT FUCKING HAVE A UMBRELLA THAT IS BIGGER THAN THE WIDTH OF TWO PEOPLE!

IMG_2610Congrats to my friends on 10 years of running a successful bar in downtown Memphis. See you in April!

IMG_2613Come to work at (INSERT COMPANY NAME HERE) it will be fun they said………….. I am kidding, I do work for a great company but there are days that I wished my parents encouraged me to go to Medical School.

Have a good week folks and I promise to get my ass into gear.

You want to go drink some wines from Switzerland?

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I am back. I was busy last week tormenting the Memphis parents of kids who were out of school for 10 days. It was a lot of fun and it really is like shooting ducks at the Peabody hotel between the hours of 11AM and 5PM. We got an email from Lady Barrister of the Murphranks asking if we wanted to go taste & drink swill some wines from Switzerland. Naturally I was intrigued because I have never tasted any wines from this country and I am always up for some day drinking with the Murphranks.

Swiss wines are grown in roughly 15,000 Hectares (37K Acres) of land. Put it this way California produces wine from 520K acres. So 93% of the wine produced in Switzerland never leave the country. Add to that it is hard to harvest the grapes due to the terrain and the high cost of living in Switzerland and the climate…..this ain’t cheap bottle of wine. The tasting was held at Anfora restaurant in Greenwich Village and let me tell you, they do a great job there.

The wine guy came out and said that this wasn’t going to be a snobby wine tasting and he encouraged us to speak up if we liked it or not. Naturally they served us some food to nosh on and I can already tell that I am a fan of Switzerland. They had one of those cheese melt broiler thingie’s on the bar. I was in love. Booze and Cheese….(hey Neighbor, quit drooling and get in the car)

We sampled 8 wines (3 white and 5 reds) and I found out that even though it may be expensive Swiss Wines are the bees knees. I may have to make a trip there (in the summer) to check it out.

IMG_2599They Fancy at Anfora. Even had a placemat of the wines we were going to taste.

IMG_2603What is that thing I asked the bar manager. She told me wait and the show will start soon.

IMG_2597Wait is that a block of cheese and one of those broiler things. Oh hell yes!

IMG_2598Hey Chef, just move that over here and give me a crack at it.

IMG_2600Melted Cheese Goodness over potatoes and meat. How good is life right now?

IMG_2606The wines that we sampled. Yes I originally said we had 8 wines but there are only 7 listed here. We got bonus wine at the end!

IMG_2595Naturally we had to prepare our palettes with some booze and sought out Tavern on Jane Street. Snapped this as it reminded me of Bardog!

IMG_2604Naturally we finished up the evening at a Greenwich Village staple and had burgers with Vodka from Austin.

A good time was had by all. Thanks Murphranks.

14 days can make one two week…..

I know I should keep my day job because of that groan’r. No it isn’t Lent just yet as my yearly Lenten tradition of providing you with corny kid jokes on The Book of Face. For 14 days (hopefully ending today) in a row we have had below freezing temps in Gotham. This past weekend it was BSC (Ball Shrinking Cold) as with the wind chill from the East River temps were below freezing and were -1 to -15 degrees.

Yes I know that Memphis had some cold weather and there are some who have to pay a plumber and even some of my San Pedro folks were bitching but give me a break. When you have to put more layers than an onion to take the dogs out you know it is cold. Hopefully today (Tuesday) the temps get above freezing and we break the streak. We had snow last Thursday and for all of you who think that the snow in New York is so pretty have obviously never been here a couple of days after it snows. The snow turns into New York Snow aka dirty and smelly.

IMG_2532You know it is going to be bad when they send out alerts because of weather.

IMG_2519What the Hell are These Things Used For?

IMG_2524Thanks to UWS Holly for this Gem of information. Get you a cheap pair of snow goggles during a Cyclone Bomb. Blowing Snow into your eyes sucks but wearing these helps.

IMG_2523Oh look how pretty 1st Avenue is. Yeah it sucks!

53677705979__45D17950-2FF6-4AF6-B990-81795E5E223FSnow on our window.

IMG_2537Afterwards the sidewalks are shoveled but normally you lose a couple feet to the piles of snow. This makes for lots of bottlenecks during rush hour. Especially at the corners which aren’t plowed.

IMG_2546It can be a mess if you are parked on the right side of the street. That’s where the plows push the snow. Aka your car will get blocked in! Recall that shovel in the earlier picture?

IMG_2535This dog loved the snow. Our dogs…not so much!

IMG_2538Here is what sucks about plowed streets. I can’t jaywalk as easy unless I want to mountain goat up and over the ice mountain.

IMG_2520Best Part of Thursday during the snow storm!

Hope you had a good one!

 

Merry New Year – Beef Jerky Time!

Hope that you had a great New Years Eve and New Years Day. I am currently enjoying poor health (not from alcohol you jackasses) because 300 gallons of snot is being produced in my head so my throat and nose have been on overdrive today. The joys of living here in the North.

Anyway I am going to try to catch up with this post so my next post (probably towards the end of the week) will be current. With that here are some pics on my iFoam.

IMG_2443Son, I don’t care if you are from the Fucking North Pole, it is winter here in New York City and the floors are NASTY. Put some fucking shoes on! Oh and this is the same guy who pulled my (still in the dryer and on the cool down cycle) laundry out and put it in a basket. He may be missing some clothes…..

IMG_2432Our WiFi name is “Penny Get Your Own Wifi” from Big Bang Theory. I am glad to know that there are some Seinfeld fans out there still!

IMG_2455Shout out to my favorite Hoosier Work Wife!

IMG_4077So glad these two knuckleheads came into town and I was able to meet up with them for a drink. I need to get out to Colorado for a trip.

IMG_7873Let this be a lesson to you iFoam people. If you have your ‘airdrop’ app thing on then people can put pics on your foam. Thankfully it wasn’t a hammer pic like I understand is the all the rage on the subways but some girls who were at the next table to us. They were cute and had a blast.

IMG_2486W46th Street between 8th and 7th Ave. Or as I told my father – the closest that I wanted to get to the silliness of Times Square.

IMG_2483Looks like I will never have to cook another meal while living in New York City. *unless we go visit Lightbulbs parents and I have to smoke meat* Momma got her an InstaPot. The problem is that I am not a big fan of yogurt.

IMG_2509Zsquared on New Years Eve #theyweresober

IMG_2510The Trumpets on New Years Eve #wewerenot

Hope you had a good laugh and had a great New Years Eve.

As a friend of mine said there are 365 days in a year so we have 365 chances. Go Make A Fucking Difference! If 2017 wasn’t your year then change your circumstances. Don’t bitch!