Weekend fun

Pictures from Last Year and of the Week.

Don’t you hate those people? The ones who will say; “See you next year.” Those people are probably the same people who try to rush onto a crowded subway/elevator car before letting others off first.

Here are some good pics that I had from December and a couple that made it in January. Hope everyone is doing well and keeping to their New Years Resolutions. I am glad that Otter is keeping his resolution of drinking lots of beer and then dining on the finest Gut Grenade in his domiciled city. I am seriously jealous of those square roto-rooter burgers.

Thankfully nobody was hurt in terms of Staff or anyone from Memphis Fire Department. Those boys will rebuild and it will be even better!
One of our friends flew in for a couple of hours in late December so we had to go out and see him.
No wonder those Purple Tail Planes list to the left a little. That is an OBSCENE AMOUNT OF STUFF Costanza!
Never really paid much attention to this building in Tudor City. Wonder what it costs to live at the top?
We didn’t eat much during the Christmas season
Wait its called Lardo Bread and it is stuffed with Ham Goodness? Oh Hell Yes!
Like I said, I starved during Christmas! Thanks Chris, Maria and Inga!
Grabbing a smoke on the fire escape. I am pretty sure this is a No-No. Mr 3 First Names/Asian Fireman – Judges ruling?
Yeah I stole it but kudos to this guy/gal who put it out there!
Geranium got inspired to re-organize the bathroom cabinet. Thanks to Baltimore SB for the encouragement.
Thanks to Z-Squared for the Prince Ping Pong Balls. Did you know that he was a huge ping pong fan? I figured his little ass couldn’t see the top of the table.

Hope you had a good weekend and your football team won. Me, my ass is going to be in Mexico during the Super Bowl so I don’t give much thought to it.

2019 in Review – What Did We Do Again?

On the back of the door in our apartment we have one of those old school calendars. We use it for scheduling shit and to make sure that we keep the dog alive with our schedules. I took a look at it this morning as I was getting the Black Eyed Peas and Greens on the stove and here is what we had to show for with Trips;

  • Geranium was away 151 days in 2019. Mind you 31 of those days were when she was in Switzerland/France. That actually made us both appreciate our time together more and take stock in our relationship which made it stronger.
  • We saw Elton John and his Farewell Tour at The Barclays
  • Got to experience The Rock And Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony. That was a killer event.
  • While Geranium was away Mr. 3 First Names & Lady Lawyer and I went to see Jose Andres at his book signing.
  • Got our Southern Redneck on thanks to BK and saw Hank Jr and Skynrd at Forrest Hills.
  • Rang in the New Year at the Barclays Center with The Strokes.
  • Oh and we had dinner at Per Se too.
  • And so that I am not a complete prick I am going to end this list that we also did some horse gambling at Aquaduct Race Track.

Regarding Trips Away, I am kind of embarrassed to divulge this to you dozen readers. I mean this list is somewhat obscene. Mind you we were able to take advantage of Geranium’s international trips and my ability to fly stand by.

  • Hung with PNG Mike, Ellie & JD in London and watched 6 Nations Rugby with them.
  • Visited Northwest Arkansas for Family Christmas
  • Made a trip Upstate with Vivian and Stone
  • Made warm weather trips to; Cancun, Belize, Fort Meyers, Gulf Shores, and Dale Hollow Lake.
  • Went over to Philly for a BBQ at Pepe’s house.
  • Got to experience Barcelona for the First Time. (Got to go back)
  • I did 48 hours in Switzerland to see Geranium and imagine that..it was raining!
  • Made it to Memphis for Thanksgiving and for a work trip in September.
  • Got to eat some low country cooking with the ChoHo’s in Charleston South Carolina.

All in all it was a good year for us for doing the fun shit. Granted I wondered why our bank account has been low but now I know why I haven’t been able to see my feet in months.

Photo by Toria of Blue Water Grill down in Belize
Charleston South Carolina with these two!
Thank God Geranium is Fluent in how to Speak Randy!
We got to go back one of these day!
I booked a whole week with these knuckleheads and I loved every minute of it!
I love this man!
Lausanne Switzerland and the snow topped alps
The rain does happen in Spain!
Oh Maya had a blast while we were away too!
Thanks Viv and Stone!
Rain in London….how odd

It was a good time for trips and shit that we saw in 2019.

Per Se 4.0

Hello, my name is Carbunkle Trumpet. I am one of those Food Snobs that you read about who travel the world eating endangered or banned species. Relax Francis…we weren’t eating the banned French Ortolans like they ate on the show Billions. Confession – I may have enjoyed the fuck out of my Fois Gras but was still legal to consume as of the 22nd of December. What makes the last Saturday before Christmas so great? The service, the wine pairings, the food, and the overall experience are top notch but it is the company that sits at the table that makes it so special.

Back story – if you are just stumbling on this blog and the Per Se part of it let me recap for you. Homeless Tim and a group of barristers about 12 years ago started having an annual dinner at Thomas Keller’s 3 Micheline Star restaurant on Columbus Circle named Per Se. Keller also has French Laundry on the west coast and TAK Room here in Hudson Yards but Per Se is considered one of the pillars of gastronomical dining here in New York. When we moved her we got the chance to dine at Le Bernardin with Baby Fine Hair and her mother the first month of living here. Mr. 3 First Names and Lady Barrister inquired if we like fine dining. We told them yes and they said they would see if they could extend an invite to us for their Christmas dinner group. We didn’t’ really think much about it as this conversation was going on over drinks in Lower Manhattan and as you can guess…..alcohol was being consumed.

So in December of 2015 we attended our first Per Se Dinner along with Asian Fireman and V.Q. (She gets the full title retired since we didn’t have a repeat this year) and a cast of others. We attended every year except for 2 years back due to a scheduling issue but it wasn’t until this year that I really took stock in the table.

The crux of the Christmas Dinner Cast are; Homeless Tim who is the scheduling /’knows the guy’ to get us the primo table. Mr. 3 First Names and Lady Barrister, you may have heard me speak of them before. Then you have the Asian Fireman/Grey Suit guy and his wife V.P.. But let’s not forget Bobcat (another barrister) and her husband the Professor. Then you throw in Geranium and myself and you have a unique dinner experience. Oh we had some dessert guests joining us later but more on that later.

This year we were celebrating not only Christmas but we were celebrating someone who kicked the shit out of cancer. As we were siting there, by the way, this dinner took 6 hours from start to finish. I really enjoyed the conversation and what I call “peeling the onion” with the different cast of characters at the table. I could try to explain but I know I can’t do it justice.

Put it this way; how can you explain the conversation dynamics of the table with someone who is a high School history teacher, a person who has been sober for 25 years and yet still enjoys our conversation while we get loose tonged during the course of the night. There is a couple who have 3 knuckleheads at home, meanwhile the other 3 couples only have 4 legged kids at their homes and don’t know what it means to have kids banging on their heads with a Stage 4 Hangover. And then there is that guy who hates white wine.

Again, I am going to stop and put up some pictures so Iuka Mississippi’s own can shame me for posting food pictures.

I mean we get our own menu for this gig.
Total Menu with the different courses and supplements.
Grey Suit Guy didn’t have any white wines on his list
Oysters and Pearls – If Keller ever takes it off the menu….. Travesty
Egg and Black Truffle Ragu. It is a labor of love to make this dish that you consume in less than 5 minutes.
Per Se’s General Manager, Sandra Schaeuffele, one year brought out the egg topping machine and raw egg for us to try to whack off the top. Bobcat got to do it last year but this year was my time. No pressure at all. By the way that was a great Sherry they were serving me for the next course. Notice the attention to detail that they do while my fumbling ass is about to make scrambled eggs.
I did ok! Carbunkle for the Win! Thanks Sandra for the pre-cut egg!
No lies were being told at the table.
You know what Bill – F you! I am going to have Fois Gras after your silly ban! This was the Fois course but notice the casing for the forced goose liver.
And I wondered why my Sodium was sky high on the following Tuesday.
Entrée Course
You can’t steal them either!
Chocolate Course – I went with the Dark & Stormy They are made in house
But now I know how they can tell what is what.
Pastry Chef Anna Bolz made this for our dinner. English Fruit Cake but all of that on top was edible.
I am always interested in what quote is on “The Pass” in the kitchen.

Like I said, the meal, the wine, the service is over the top but the folks at the table make it all the better. Honestly – I would be ok if Homeless Tim one day called and said that he got our Christmas Dinner at Waffle House. Sure I would be disappointed but knowing the cast of folks at the table and I would be ok with that.

Again, Thank you to Tim, Jess & Dan for the invite.

A Message to Tiger Fans heading to Brooklyn 1 of 2

So we are about a week away till a whole bunch of Tiger Fans head to Manhattan and Brooklyn for the Barclays Center Classic. I figured that I would put together a quick list for you Tiger Nation Fans coming up. Up here we always say “You got to have a guy” so think of ole Carbunkle as “your guy”. That and naturally #RoboCares. Here is a list of stuff to do/not to do in no sequential order;

  • Airport Taxis/Ubers – First off, ignore the guys who tell you that the taxi line is going to be very long and they have a car ready for you. They are illegal Uber/Lyft drivers and they may take your credit card but they have been known to charge your CC higher fees. Ubers and Lyfts are fine to use and they have an area to meet them that is covered.
  • Yellow Taxi vs Uber – I prefer to use Yellow Taxi’s in Manhattan as they are more plentiful and Uber’s will drop you if there is heavy traffic. However, I use Uber/Lyft in Brooklyn because you don’t find Yellow/Green Taxi’s as much as you do in Manhattan.
  • Just say no to the guys giving CD’s on the streets. Its a scam. Also unless you really want a pic with a superhero in Times Square just say no to that also. They will pester you for money.
  • People begging for money in the subways – They are everywhere. If you feel the need to give to the homeless then give them a protein bar or cheese and crackers. You will be surprised who says they are hungry but will turn you down when you give them food.
  • General Rules of the Road – downsize your wallet/purse. Do you really need your Flying Saucer card or your frequent coffee user card. ID, Credit Cards and Cash is really all you will need. Also put that shit in your front pocket. Although I have not heard of pickpockets as of late but it is better safe than sorry.
  • Nothing Good Happens After Midnight – Please note that Geranium would take Mass Transit alone many times when she was getting her MBA and never felt threatened. The subways are not like the movie “Warriors” because that shit stopped in the 90’s. We would take subways home after events but here is something to know. What you need to know is that after midnight all trains will run local. This means longer wait times at stations and for you to get to your destination. I have found that Ubers/Cabs are best at this time.
  • Directions – I actually use Google Maps and find that it is the best out there. It can give you up to date Subway directions and great walking directions. Just make sure you are using the ‘walking’ directions because it may think you are in a car. NOTE – Downtown in FiDi is tricky because the streets are narrow and it may have you a block over. You can always ask a New Yorker or someone walking a dog.
  • Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade – Here is where I can’t help you. Unless you can sweet talk Z squared into letting you up to their conference room over looking Ave of Americas you are on your own. Do some Google Searches for places that will have viewing parties. If it is cold like really cold you may want to watch it on TV.
  • Texting and Walking – Don’t do it! I will personally punch you in the throat if I see you do that. Those people are easy to spot. The walk slow and makes you want to post up like Gasol to take a charge because they will run into you.
  • Dinner/Brunch/Thanksgiving Plans – This week is going to be busy with fellow tourist, book your reservations NOW.
As seen as in Fort Greene Brooklyn!
Pay attention to this map because you may want to reference it for Thursday’s class

I will follow up on Thursday with some better information. Trust me, you will want to read that one.

#RoboCares

The “Otter is 100BZE/50US” Birthday Celebration

As previously mentioned in last weeks worthless dribble post we just returned from a quick 4 night trip to Belize. Now that I have ridden the subways with my mosquito bites and sunburn a couple of times I am ready to give a proper description of the shenanigan’s that went on down in Belize. Hate to say it but if you are one of those Lurkers I am going to disappoint you. What goes on down in San Pedro stays in San Pedro. Sorry that are the rules.

Now before you think all are safe, I am not going to lie one bit. I swallow hard every time I see that The Windy City Brit posts some pictures to the FB page thinking she took pictures of that drunk guy on Friday night. But she is a good soul and would not do that to me the person who got overserved. Small bills right T?

So let me give you some back story to this Great weekend extravaganza. About 2 and a half years I get a notification that there will be a celebration down in Belize for Otter’s Birthday. I go to the calendar to circle those dates. The dates don’t match up. I recall that Otter and I are close to the same age as we are more of the junior members of the ACMB. Then I realize that he is inviting me to an event 2 and a half years in advance. What an asshole!

That is kind of brilliant if you ask me. This way you can start saving up, schedule the dog/child sitters and look forward to a weekly update by Otter on the page. I am kidding, he would send updates for those of us who have never been or for those of us who forget a lot (Pug I am not looking at you) and it was fun to bust Otter’s chops. Granted he saw a tweet that I sent to Joe Belize that I was going to be on the island for his birthday celebration and didn’t realize that we had RSVP’d in the yes. We always wait till the last minute to book airfare and hotel accommodations.

Here is where Otter gets Mad Props;

  • He arranged for hotel accommodations at one of the resorts south of town.
  • Scheduled a boat/Snorkel/Booze Cruise for all members.
  • Arranged a mid day afternoon activity for those who needed to watch College Football.
  • He talked a 6 person band from Columbus Ohio to come down and play 2 nights and a split off band to play 2 shows. Oh and he was able to coordinate getting drums, PA and sound boards handled down there on the island.
  • He not only was able to bring some of us older (well not so much me or TravelQueen) ACMB members, Friends from Ohio and those who have never visited San Pedro before.
  • I am not even going to harp on his mad spread sheet skills. (Love ya Otter)

Here is what I appreciated from the weekend plans. Other than the Friday 8:30AM call to be on the dock for the Booze Cruise (you can’t drink all day if you don’t start early) that was really the only formal plans that you had to do. Trust me when I say that I have been places where you have to follow a ridged schedule and if you have ever hearded cats before…..

The other part that we really enjoyed and I mentioned it in an email to TacoGirl was that it was so much fun experiencing San Pedro thought the eyes of someone who has never been there. That I knew of there were threee couples who were first timers to the island. To watch them experience the island like we did made this trip even more memorable.

Happy Birthday Otter! You magnificent Bastard! I am so happy to have been able to share your 50th birthday celebration with friends and family.

This was a fun time on Friday!
Great Views with Great Friends. Also this is the “Before” picture when Mrs. Otter arranged for the deck chair that we were sitting on was to fall off the deck. Thanks to my cat like reflexes I was able to prevent falling to my demise.
The Fabulous Johnson Brothers *Photo Credit to Windy City Brit
Me to XXXX – You happen to be drooling, pull yourself together there XXXX
Funtimes at Camo Cantina
Not only is he 50 but he can sing a song or two too!
The Band on Saturday Night!
Broke my heart when they said they have menus and we didn’t have to order from the board.
Us and the Windy City Brit and the Movie Star
Love that I don’t have to look at high rises to see the sky!
We get it Otter, you are with the Band!
My Favorite Dancing Jewelry Designer
Wait, what does this mean we have an excuse to go back to the island with the same group? Congrats you two kids!

It was a fun long weekend and I am so grateful for the friendships that we already have and those that were started last weekend!

A Mid Week And Only Post For This Week

Leaving on a big metal plane tomorrow for 17.9214° N, 87.9611° W to drink with a couple friends. I have been waiting for Otter’s 50th birthday for like 2 years and its finally here. How fucked up is that. I am celebrating the anniversary of someone who now has to get a colonoscopy. Oh well it could be worse. It could be my 50th Birthday. Can’t wait to see some old friends this weekend too!

Anyway have a good week and weekend and try to stay warm you New Yorkers. I hear that it is going to be kinda chilly this weekend.

How Many Beers did we drink that day at the Split KLC Man?
Going to eat me some good food this weekend too!
So proud of how Memphis rolled out for Game Day!
You may be from Memphis if you know what that means. Memphis AF
Its corny but hey at least it isn’t Nashville. There they celebrate Hot Chicken and Tractor Rides
Don’t Worry the Dog will be Fine!

Have a good weekend!

Pictures of the Week and a Word of Pause for you Tiger Fans on Saturday Morning.

So Game Day is coming to Beale Street. Congrats to the Memphis Tigers on becoming a relevant and respected football program. Hey I recall those Larry Porter days…yikes! But seriously I am proud of those fans who have braved empty stadiums and shitty teams. You guys have earned having Game Day tomorrow and I hope you make this former Memphian proud and roll out for this!

Now for you handful of rummy’s that I may or may not have slung a beer with in the past 10 years. Game Day, if you have never seen it live, is going to be a bit boring. They will have some spots where they will interview the coach. Do a feature on Memphis and make it a tear jerker but in a good way. The Guest Picker will come out which peaks a lot of noise, and then by the grace of God Corso better put on a Fucking Tiger head. Sad to say – The rest of the show is going to be boring. Now read my words you select few – JUST BECAUSE IT IS BORING THIS ISN’T THE TIME TO GO DO IRISH CAR BOMBS OR SILKY SULLIVAN DIVERS! You are an adult now and this isn’t BBQ fest. You have a full day of football and the game is going to be late so unless you want Liberty Bowl Stadium to resemble Death Valley down in Baton Rouge…..lay off the booze till the afternoon.

You can have a beer or two in the morning. Tio Trumpet isn’t going to chastise you for having a Bloody Mary to settle the nerves. I mean you are on Beale waiting for the team pics but please add pause to your game folks. Also do us a favor and come up with some good signs for us folks who will be watching from the Cigar Inn? My buddies will be busting my balls if we give a bad look.

Seriously have fun and when the Tigers win Saturday night make sure you avoid any TV cameras. I still have vivid memory of Didi getting on the news after the UT game. He was wearing a blue pom-pon on his head saying “We kicked their ass!” Then my dad called me the next day and asked if that was him.

You got this and I expect to see some familiar faces on TV. I will actually be going to the Memphis Watch Party on Saturday night. Hey @pcolinjr – where are we meeting again? @jensized you want to get out before the marathon? Who am I kidding they don’t read this dribble. I am excited for Memphis and am happy that those friends of mine who have been enduring the Chuck Stobart years now have a day in the sun. Can you tell us hog Fans what that feels like?

Now the pics of the week.

JamFoodie and Mr 3 First Names – What was the name of this place again? I dig’d it!
Have you gotten your San Pedro Scoop Book Yet? *Shameless Plug because I expect to not have to pay for an autograph or a selfie*
And yes RC – That is a “Immigrants Feed America” T-Shirt I am wearing!
I am glad that Baseball is over. I hate Joe Buck worse than Sean Touhy
My Football Season is over so I might as well follow a winner!
Like I said, our football teams suck!
This spoke to me!
I saw this and just laughed. Could you imagine the conversation these two had. Talk about a dual headline!

So in the words of Rocky Kasaftes’ beloved Mother – “You boys don’t get into much trouble and remember my words…Nothing good happens after midnight!”

Go Tigers!

Where have you been? We were about to put your ugly mug on a milk carton.

So before you start in on me let me explain. For the past two and a half weeks Geranium has been off the road and working from home. Trust me when I say that the dog and I have enjoyed having Geranium home. That and she also helps with the chores in-between eating bon-bons. However, with her being home I really have not had time to blog or gather my thoughts. You see, once she gets done with her work it would be kind of a dick move for me to jump on my laptop. Hence why I have not been blogging since our trip to Charleston. I will catch up.

So without further wait, here are some pics from the past 2 weeks for Pictures of the week.

These past 2 weeks have been tough for me at work. I will be so glad to see this in early November. No not the kid and her mom, the fucking picnic Table in Caye Caulker!
I bust their chops on this thing but God Bless the FDNY and all the different teams who support New York City. For those of you wondering Rescue 1 is specialty division that services Manhattan. Cat stuck in the tree, nope these boys aren’t showing up. Randal’s Island Tram stuck in the middle of the East River with passengers on board….yep these guys show up.
If you were playing and needed “Woman doing interpretive dance in a bathing suit on the Morning commute into the city” you would have a Bingo.
If you are going to be running this let me know. I know that Jen from Memphis is going to be visiting all 5 boroughs so we will go out and support her.
Like I said Geranium has been busy…..(she will kill me for posting this)
Its’ Fall Y’all!
How do you pronounce this? I haven’t gotten an answer yet.
Maya is looking at me going “Aww Fuck, she is gone again. Now he will blame his farts on me”
Tiger Fans are coming to Brooklyn for Thanksgiving. I am trying to suggest a great place that they can’t get in Memphis. I will let you know.
Finally Midtown Uniform Weather here in Manhattan!

I do thank a couple of you assholes who were checking in on me. I am back and Geranium will be back on the road for a couple weeks straight.

Happy Friday! I didn’t have to Kill Anyone……Yet! Pictures of the Week(s)

We Made it! We didn’t have to push anyone off a subway platform this week. So right now I am heading into the city to bang out some work. This early evening I am heading down to Low Country for the weekend. Me and the MoHo’s will be hanging out and Lawd knows everyone else.

First off – Shout out to my Saucer/Farmers Market ‘Stalker’ aka reader #7 of this worthless dribble. I appreciate the hello and glad to know that you are assimilating to living in the 38103.

So *Disclaimer* – I was in Memphis for about 24 hours last week. I was there so quick I really didn’t announce it as to upset anyone. It was a work trip. The purpose was for additional training on how to sell tickets on those double decker tour buses while we have to impose Tariffs. So if you are reading this worthless dribble (Oh btw – LJZ called my ass out last week because she actually does read this thing) I apologize but we will be back in November for Thanksgiving.

Anyway here are some pics I snapped.

If you got this then you have known my upbringing of the nephew
PNG Mike – You got a model number on this sucker?
*as seen during UN General Assembly
Who knew that Nova and Farmer Ted had their own Rubs.
Have you ever seen a subway floor so clean and those legs are sporting some fresh ink too!
I may be shorter than you two boys but I make much more money than you do.
Oh and I know places in Manhattan for you to get a Fake ID.
So Fucking Lay off and Respect Tio Robo!
Two hundred Fucking Degrees on a Friday! And these Jackasses are wearing Vests. Oh and How long is the Rental Car Ramp….
See you in November!

Have a good weekend folks.

Back in the Saddle

Sorry for no posts last week. It was a tough week for us. We had to get the Little Bastid off to School and being off for a couple days put us behind. Not much I can really report from the Dale Hollow trip. That sucker was full of Non Disclosure agreements and “don’t post this on Social Media” comments. But lets be honest. If weren’t there you probably wouldn’t think that shit was that funny anyway.

I will be back at my normal self this week. Oh and welcome to my newer readers. More on that.

First Day of 5th Grade 3.0
I hear that Alabama will rebuild.
Happy 7th Birthday to this fluff ball! Hopefully you can take it easy today.

And if your football team didn’t win this weekend I hope your beer was at least cold.