Whisky Tango Foxtrot Carbunkle?

Stop yelling at me, you are probably going to see fewer posts between now and the middle of May. No I am not doing some weird Post Lent purge, momma is nearing the end of her NYU Grad School so the laptop is in full use. Anyway we really haven’t been doing much as of late *BECAUSE IT HAS BEEN SO FUCKING COLD* I mean seriously, we have had 4 Nor’Easters and this Sunday is the start of Seersucker Suit Season!

I do have a future coffee shop blog post/rant about 4 C-Word Upper East Side hard working housewives as I sat next to them at 80th and Lexington. Let’s just say that they might as well have been wearing tennis skirt outfits and or Lulumon leggings as pants. This past weekend was kinda lame but we have new iFoams and it only took me 5 hours to get that done on Sunday.

And as we know this week is Holy Week or as Julian Maile from Losers Lounge said on Good Friday last year “So Jesus died today but he will be back in 3 days. Pretty much anything goes!”

Happy Easter Folks!

When we do get out of our cages we do come up on some really cool shit! This is Grand Central Station as we were walking with my Work Wife (the Domestic One) so she could catch her train home.

The Real and the Domestic One! S/O to the Bar, International, Memphis and HW/AMF wives.

I mean seriously folks! This was taken last Thursday. I saw that the folks in Memphis were bitching about it being hot.

I seriously laughed out so loud that I had scalding hot espresso come out my nose.

Easter for the longest time was always trips down to Destin. I do miss some Peeps Jousting! 

Happy Easter Spud!

And to quote RAB – “I can’t wait for you to tell me on Sunday that the bread is ready!”

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Katie Mac is going to kill me – The Campbell Apartment Bar & Lounge

Yeah, she is over in Europe right now according to her Snaps but when she reads this she may fly direct back to JFK just to whip my arse. You see when I moved up here Katie Mac was the first to tell me about The Campbell Apartment in Grand Central Station and how cool it was. I visited it once to meet up with a former client of mine from Memphis (think “Thank You Cattlemens”) but she had to bag at the last minute. It took me a while to find the joint. I mean I have lived up here now 2 years and I finally can make my way around Grand Central without difficulty but it is still huge.

So when RJ and JL (not Social Media JL, Ponzi Scheme JL) were in town this past weekend we made a trip with the Asian Fireman to The Campbell Apartment for drinks. I was in work clothes but I recalled that when they were with old management it was slacks and dress shirts. Thankfully the new ownership relaxed the rules just a tad.

Drinks at the Campbell are old school New York; manhattans, classic martinis and upscale bourbons and scotches. Our group chose Red Wine, Manhattans, a Martini and someone had to keep it real and ordered a Bud Light. The service at The Campbell is impeccable and we had a good time and left after having 2 rounds. Thank God we left when we did, to drink in Midtown Manhattan you pay to play.

Katie Mac – Don’t worry when you come up I promise to take you there.

Enter off of the Vanderbilt Pass which is on the West side of Grand Central. To find it inside the terminal is tricky.

You can also look for the sign too.

Picture from Ponzi Scheme JL – Of the Main Bar and the huge ass ceilings

The Asian Fireman and I win the award for the most expensive drinks in the joint

Even the coasters are fancy

Gold raised lettering too! Patrick Bateman from American Psycho would drink here

Don’t bust my chops, some of you guys drink on Beale Street or the Peabody Hotel.

 

Meet Me by the Saturday Night Live Clock in Grand Central

A while back I was going to do a joint day with one of my fellow tour bus ticket sellers. His territority is south of mine near Grand Central Station. He told me to meet him in Grand Central Station which if you have never been before it is effin huge. I get to the station a couple minutes early and he was running late. I tell him to meet me at the SNL clock in the main terminal. Below the SNL clock is an information station for tourists. While I was standing there I overheard about a dozen question exchanges by tourists. Now for someone who has lived here for some 685ish days some of these questions were hard to give directions. Here are some examples of the questions;

• Q – “How do I get to Scarsdale?” A – “Track 16 and the train leaves in 5 minutes”
• Q – “Can I buy my ticket on the train?” A – “Yes but you can get a cheaper ticket over at the kiosks.”
• Q – “How do we get to JFK and the AirTrain?” A – “You would need to take the E Subway line to JFK and transfer there?”
• Q – “How do we get to the Statue of Liberty?” A – “You would need to take the Subway to the Staten Island Ferry?”
• Q – “Where does President Trump Live?” A – “The White House, you need to go to Union Station to ride Amtrak.”
• Q – “Where can I get one of those cheap knock-off Fendi Purses?” A – “Canal Street or any corner in Midtown.”
• Q – “Those guys with the large guns hanging around the front entrance, what are they here for?” A – “Bad Guys”
• Q – “Do you know if those hotdog vendors are serving food that is safe?” A – “If you eat one everyday for a year it may kill you but you will be ok.”
• Q – “Do you know how to get to Chik-Fil-A on 6th Avenue?” A – “Yeah but why?”

Have a good day!

 

Pictures of the “Last” Week

Sorry for the last of posts this past week. I had a sinus infection, the anniversary of my circling the sun happened, it was a bad week of selling tour bus tickets and momma used the computer all last weekend. Anyway I am behind the 8ball once again. So without further adieu here are some pics I had on my iFoam

I am so glad that baseball season is now here. That means that Hockey Season is over right? #LetsgoRangers

A Cups posted this picture on Insta. I am not going to lie, it moved when I saw the cheese bath for burger dipping. She is my spirit animal afterall!

Hey D&P, I have a client lunch this week and guess where I am taking them!

We were dropping off The-Soon-To-Be Mrs. P and I snapped a pic of this.

We may or may not have been sitting here some 20 minutes before taking the pic of Grand Central.

Still can’t believe that this silly bastard isn’t here to take me to the Track now that I live up here. This is probably a good thing.

That’s ok, I know that she is up there right now busting McNick’s balls on a daily basis. Happy Birthday Otis, we miss you.

Sure go ahead and crack open a 2X4 Bud Heavy. Oh wait that is your 3rd while sitting here. You wouldn’t happen to know (INSERT NAME HERE) would you?

I bet that Mrs. Trumpets boss’ 5 year old daughter Emanuel has forgotten that she invited me to Passover Dinner. Believe it or not I really want to go. The closest Jewish person I knew in Memphis was my Pediatrician.

Have a good Holy Week and Passover!

The Best Music in NYC for a $2.75 Cover Charge

You hear it just about every time you swing past the turnstile heading into the bowels of NYC. No it isn’t the sound of rats being run over by the Express train, it is music. Sometimes it is a simple person playing a flute, or violin, or some western musical instrument, hell I have seen a kazoo player down there. When I was with one of the tourist bus sales reps we made a trip to the upper West Side (Seinfeld territory) which is one area that I am not that familiar with. We were heading down the 8th street and W45th street station and I stopped and said that I heard some Reverend Al Green. He couldn’t believe I knew who it was then he later gave me mad props when I told him I knew about Yo Gotti. His comment about the band playing ‘Let’s stay together’ was one that I will never forget; “The Best music you will ever hear for a $2.75 cover charge.”
On my daily commute to work, I have to transfer at Grand Central Station and there is young lady who plays the violin. I am normally in a hurry but she always is smiling and happy and that puts me back in perspective and in a happy mood. I throw in a buck every couple of days into her case and she always says thank you to me.
Earlier this fall, I went out to Queens for a job interview. As I was returning back to the UES, a group of Mexican Mariachi players popped onto my subway car and put out a jam. Did I recognize the song…no, did I appreciate the gesture and gave them a couple of bucks….sure did. I know that this breaks my strict “don’t give people money” but in my opinion, they are providing a service.  Who knows the next time you see them they could be headlining at a Music Festival or picked up by Flowered Man Bag Productions.

Here is my violin player as I head to the 7 Train. If I try to stop and take a picture of her head on, I will get run over by the throngs of people behind me.

Not Sure what this damned thing is but it sounds kinda cool.

You boys know “Bamboleo” by the Gypsy Kings?

Not sure of the name but they WERE LOUD!

Dude is a Musical Legend!

These guys were pretty good and also VERY LOUD!

Who doesn’t love a drum line?

Have a good weekend and RMT, there will be a post on Monday.