IKEA

Carbunkle Trumpet Eats Crow again

I am somewhat of a smart ass…I know that some of you can’t believe that one bit but it is true. Way back when IKEA announced they were coming to Memphis people lost their damned minds on Social Media. This announcement was before we even knew that we were going to move to New York and have our entire apartment outfitted with IKEA stuff. I made some snarky comment about the particle board furniture and how Memphians were losing their shit. My good friend TO the OJ Simpson Bronco driver took notice of my tweet.

When we moved to New York almost 2 years ago we naturally made our first trip to Red Hook’s IKEA and I was impressed. Yes we outfitted our entire apartment since we sold all of our shit before we made the 1600 mile drive. I think that I made a comment on Twitter and my friend TO was quick to remind me about the tweet and she called me out on it. I deserved it and it was funny too. Because of the location of the IKEA in Brooklyn it is somewhat hard to get there. You can take the ferry to and from but trust me when I say that schlepping your crap back in a blue bag sucks.

This past weekend Mrs. Trumpet was in the throws of schoolwork, studying and I needed to get the hell out of the house. I had a small list of stuff that I needed to get from IKEA. I figured that heading to Red Hook was a good way to get out of the house and get it done. Now the Ferry doesn’t start running from Pier 11 until 11:30 and I wanted to try to get some Cigar time with the boys so I took my chances and headed to Brooklyn on the F Train. The F Train made news last week when one of the subway trains went tits up and lost power, and air-conditioning. One of the Rhodes girls from many moons ago was stuck on that train and I could only imagine how bad that sucked. Thankfully the F Train made it to Smith Avenue and I grabbed a 5 dollar Uber drive to IKEA.

All in all it was only 45 minutes door to door and I was in and out of IKEA under an hour and was able to catch the 11:45 ferry to Wall Street. So there you go TO, feel free to bust me out again as I eat some crow. Be kind would you?

IMG_1040Waiting on the F Train. That joker has yet to be on time.

IMG_1041She would get major style points if those suckers were pink.

IMG_1043On the Ferry heading back to Manhattan

IMG_1044Governors Island

IMG_1045Doesn’t get old looking at Lower Manhattan from the water at all.

IMG_1046Looking at the buildings on Water Street and Old Slip

IMG_1047Got some more $2.99 frames to hang the Playbills and ‘cool NYC stuff’ that we have done.

IMG_1048So far we have been to 15 cool NYC things and or plays/musicals. Not bad considering we haven’t gone to Colbert or Fallon (yet)

IMG_1049More Spice Racks and spice holders. Unfortunately we have to move them since the drawers can’t come out fully now. #Robofail

IMG_1050New Up lighting for the bedroom. Why don’t New Yorkers like lighting?

Hope you had a good weekend and stayed cool. It was a hot one in the city on Sunday.

 

 

 

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Carbunkle Trumpet the Graffiti Artist

Labor Day weekend we decided to stay in the city because we were still recovering from Mexico that and Momma wanted to get some reading done for her first day of classes at NYU. Friday night we went out with AV & DJ to check out the Frying Pan on the Hudson and ended up staying a little later than usual. On Saturday morning I was asked to do a little project for Mrs. Trumpet’s make up stand in our master bedroom lounge. The table that she purchased from IKEA was a little too short for her so she needed me to make some table extensions for it.

You have no idea how long it has been since I have been to a guy’s toy store, Home Depot, I was giddy with excitement. I figured I would get a 2X4 cut up and build a little T shaped base and put some casters on it so we can roll it out of the way to get to storage under the bed. To keep it aesthetically pleasing I was going to paint the wood black to match the base of the table. I get the wood cut, find some casters that didn’t cost me a fortune, got all the hardware and figured that a can of Black Spray Paint would do the job.

I go into the paint department and find that the spray cans were all locked up tighter than Dick’s hatband. I find an associate and ask him what is up and he tells me that because of New York’s Anti-Graffiti laws it isn’t sold to the general public. I am really scratching my head and I show Skillet the wood and tell him about my project and he asks me where I was going to paint the wood. Corner of First Avenue and E71st Street was my response and he tells me that I am not allowed to spray in public or inside buildings. Seriously I am dumbfounded, dude it isn’t like I am making Meth, I just want to paint some wood!

Needless to say I grab a can of black paint, a brush, a plastic drop cloth and get to work. I get done with my project and naturally go over to ‘reward’ myself at the Cigar Inn and I GTS (Google that Shit) about the spray paint rules of NYC. Apparently there is a rule. Who knew? You can smoke dope on the city streets but can’t spray paint. Oh well. At least I got my Home Depot fix taken care of for the week.

IMG_2186Not sure what the problem it, the desk fits me just fine.

Spray PaintStill befuddles me….

IMG_2185Who Cares, I am making something and getting to use my drill!

IMG_2184Project in the works!

IMG_2187If I didn’t read it with my own eyes, I would have said you were fucking with me.

IMG_2220Finished Product

Wait till I start making Moonshine in the UES!

 

 

 

Oh No! Naked Guy is brushing he teeth!

Yep, I just made a “Friends” reference but don’t worry, that is about it. The building we live in here in New York takes up the front half of 1st Avenue and is in the shape of a U. Our studio/apartment is on the inside corner so we have 2 windows; one facing East and a larger one facing North towards the other studio/apartment. Now I have heard NY horror stories of windows facing brick walls so we are thankful that we have somewhat of a view uptown and can see all the other apartments on our city block. I bet you know where I am going with this aren’t you?

With our apartments location the main window’s vantage point is a straight shot into our bedroom and bathroom.  Back when we had our condo in Memphis had plenty of windows and also a straight shot view into the building across from Main Street. Thankfully that building was vacant so we never had to worry about putting up blinds or curtains.  Here in Gotham, I think it was the first week that Mrs. CBT suggested that I may want close the blind or door when I was in the shower. I joking said, “If they are dirty enough to look, I might as well give them a show.” This started me to think so after a trip to IKEA I put up a curtain on the hallway from the bedroom to the bathroom to offer more privacy when we have our blinds up.

Well it happened folks…..We ventured out this past Friday for happy hour drinks and when we returned home for the evening the blinds on the bedroom window were still up. It was dark outside and one had many ‘views’ into the apartments across the way. I glance over and see the apartment 1 down from ours and see that dude was rocking a pair of boxer briefs while brushing his teeth. I tell Mrs. Trumpet that she may want to check out the show across the way and seriously folks I created a monster. Thankfully dude finally finished his primping routine and got dressed but I spent an hour cleaning the window from all the smudge marks made by Mrs. Trumpet. Should I really be worried that a telescope arrived via Amazon Prime this morning?  I think that it should only be fair that when I am shaving my balls next time I leave the blinds and curtain open. Sorry, I was just checking to see if you were still reading. Have a good one.

IMG_0443Here is the view from our bedroom of the other side of the building. Also were the show was the night prior. *Notice how clean the window is after I cleaned up all the smudge marks*

IMG_0441Standing in the bathroom peering out the window. Or as I say “Showtime”

IMG_0442Here is the view with the curtains shut. It helps in the summer when the shower is in use and doesn’t turn into steam room.

5039bd07a6b0f85e56d3b4f15c604747No this isn’t the view we had, I nipped this off the internet

So just remember to close your blinds.

 

Pics of the Week – a poor showing if you ask me

As you can tell, the weeks after the New Year are meant to be indoors and putting on that winter weight. Unless you wanted to see what we watched on TV this week there isn’t much to report. Not to worry, this weekend a Southern Belle is coming to town along with her Midwest friend and a New Orleans woman so I am sure there will be some pics to share  with the class next week.

IMG_0122I had chores to do before I could go see the boys at the Cigar Inn

IMG_0127We made another purchase from IKEA and now have storage in our 535 square foot studio

IMG_0144I was craving some Low Country food so Momma made me Shrimp & Grits.  Try to explain to a Yankee what the F grits are? Yep that is what I tried to do the next day.

IMG_0114Ford and E went down to Belize and all I got was this Effin Picture! That does it, you have pissed me off! *picks up foam* “Hello Travelocity, what you got in airfare in late March???”

Yep, we got tempted by our friends who live near Indy who are going to 17.9214° N, 87.9611° W and it got us thinking and surfing the web. We are making a long layover in San Salvador but the total sum of the cost of the tickets is cheaper than one Christmas flight to Memphis so look out Scoop, Taco, Badass Auntie and many others. The Trumpets are returning!

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Enough Said! See you during Holy Week San Pedro!

 

Robopalooza in NYC

 

Momma Trumpet left my ass this past week. She left me for the warm and sunny bars of Key West Florida for a girls trip. I joke that when I am left alone that we celebrate “Robopalooza” where it is wild parties, eating peanuts on couch while throwing the shells on the ground, and the toilet seat remains up at all times. I also have been known to do some type of a project in her absence because I don’t want anybody to hear me curse when I screw something up because I didn’t read the directions. One trip when we had the house on Monteigne I painted the bar and my best friends mother still to this day curses me when she re-painted it Seattle Seahawks colors. This trip we hung some pictures that we had been meaning to hang and I did some organizing of the spices after a trip to IKEA.

 FullSizeRenderI may have visited the Cigar Inn on East 73rd Street maybe once this past week…. Ok it was 5 times, are you happy now?

IMG_9599I may have had one beer while momma was out of town. Ok it was two are you happy now?

IMG_9613I finally got around to getting a frame for the “Thomas Crown Affair” print that we never got around to hanging. Coincidently, this print covers our electrical box so it is a win-win.

IMG_9615Hung the Playbill’s that Mrs. Trumpet’s plays that she attended. I also figured I would hang our notable NYC events on the wall. Here we have, in order, The Pope’s Visit, Hamilton, and Rotten Tomatoes

IMG_9616Visited that fancy Seafood restaurant and then saw Saturday Night Live

IMG_9617

Our visit to the Rubin Museum to hear Damien Echols

IMG_9614

At IKEA (feel free to make a comment Tia) I found these spice jars and picture ledges so I got out the drill and went to town.

IMG_9610

I missed her ass!

Also shout out to our favorite Russian, Alexia, and Maria for drinks and dinner this past week. I found a new Thai restaurant that I can take my mother to when she visits again.