Hurricane or Tropical Storm Sunsets

So with the Jersey Shore and New York in Tropical Storm Warnings and Watches last weekend we had some killer sunsets. I knew that we weren’t going to have bad weather because there was no talk of RAB’s main man crush, Jim Cantore, coming to Gotham. Anyway the weather was great and almost chilly in the mornings.

IMG_2176Taken at the Frying Pan overlooking New Jersey

IMG_2177Really killer colors you know.

14264146_10100918980103786_7092724042518069986_nBecause of Hurricane Hermine the Murphranks had to cut short their Shore Vacation.

IMG_2207Overlooking Brooklyn

IMG_2211I should have bet to the left!

IMG_2217Again with the colors! Beautiful

IMG_2213Manhattan in the background

Have a good weekend!


The Boogie Down BBQ on World Famous 236th Street!

You have probably heard me reference my friend RJ who lives in Memphis. RJ was originally from Pennsylvania but moved to Crime-Free Memphis as he wanted to be a shuttle driver at Graceland. RJ found himself a great woman (Let me rephrase that, Mallory, his wife,  is an effin saint) and they lived behind our house in South Bluffs. When we decided to sell Bar 595 he and Mallory bought it after we suckered hard sold JL (not Angry JL the one who can’t ride the majority of the rides at Disneyworld) into buying the house on Madewood to make the Ponzi scheme work. RJ’s best friend is the Asian Fireman and a whole bunch of other players who live near and around our vicinity. The Asian Fireman would come down each year for Memphis in May BBQfest so naturally they got the indirect smoking fever and sure enough some stick burners smokers have been purchased and reside in the Bronx and Glenside Pennsylvania.

A couple of years back the idea of The Boogie Down BBQ was born and a bunch of  Memphians headed up to 236th street and took over the house when the Asian Fireman’s wife was pregnant with C-Man. Can you believe we cooked all the food on just one smoker and a grill for 40 people?  After a trip to Glenside last year we headed back to 236th street and we were expecting a hungry crowd of 100 invited guests. We had 3 smokers and the grill and the menu included; Pork Shoulder, Baby Back Ribs, Spare Ribs, Beef Brisket, Beef Ribs, Chicken, Red Snapper and BBQ Nachos. The crowd came hungry and we delivered. A good time was had by all.

IMG_1718We must have elected a new Pope last weekend. Like a million of them

IMG_1717Prepping the Ribs

IMG_1719Loading the Smoker with Championship Ribs

IMG_1729Good to see Butchie who was in town for the day.

IMG_1732Me – “Um I smell something burning.” Asian Fireman – “Carbunkle, you need to lay off the sauce, there isn’t anything burning.” Me – “You were saying…..”

IMG_1710Pepe bossing us around from the chair

IMG_1708My buddy RJ, can’t wait to hoist a couple Cerveza’s down in Mexico!

IMG_1734The Spread for Dinner Service.

13697082_10154377130171214_6349630965306790063_nThe Backwood’s Smoker ish smoker. I could so use this sucker down on First Avenue.

13707714_10154377130246214_6399415964770970517_nBrisket’s being sliced.

IMG_1733Little Baby Priscilla Presley H is going to be the cutest girl in the Convent till she is 25!

It was a good time and I am glad to be enjoying some dinner that isn’t Hickory Smoked.






Pics from The Week

We had a good week this past week, the short work week ran me out of days so some of these pics are from the week prior to the 4th. Oh and I had to do some deleting of some pics because I am almost at my storage limit so not too many good ones.

IMG_1570What Southerner doesn’t own at least one seersucker or linen suit in their life? I think I have had over a dozen in my life. Sadly they get DESTROYED up here moving around here in the city so I found a joint that sells them cheap. Broke this bad boy out last week and had 2 tourists take pictures with me in SoHo. Wait till I get the straw Brooks Brothers hat for the Friday of Labor Day!

IMG_1564The Monkey Head’s Russian Groomer likes Willie Nelson too? I love this woman!

IMG_1606I would say that our Uber Driver is well connected. 3 smart devices running at the same time.

IMG_1651 [69414]It has been a tad warm here in NYC. God Bless my coworker who also “Runs Hot” because I have been drying myself off each morning sitting at this sucker.


Yep, I think the Grizz will be pretty good this year!

IMG_1653 [69415]

S/O to my fellow Tavern frequenter on winning a very prestigious award in our company. I had 3 coworkers win the award and 4 friends of mine who work in other divisions of the company do the same.

We are going to be busy as we are hosting the first recipient of the Carl Lipbalm Memorial Caddy Scholarship this weekend. More on that later. Have a good weekend and make it count!








Funny Thing Happened at Work 1 Year Ago

“Carbunkle Trumpet there is a phone call for you.” stated the office manager who was eating bon-bons and drinking “coffee” that smelled of Kahlua *Oh I am so going to take some shit for that one*

Me – “Hello, this is CBT, what do you want?”

Mrs. CBT – “You always answer the phone that way?” *editor’s note – it is very uncommon for me to get a phone call from Mrs. CBT during the day. Text yes but phone call means something is up.

Me – “I saw your number on the caller ID and it was from your work. What’s up? You don’t normally call me in the office, who died?”

Mrs. CBT – “I was calling you to tell you to turn in your 2 week notice to EM, I got the job in New York City!”

Me – *butthole clinches a little tighter upon hearing those words “You mean the job that you just interviewed for and they said it would be 2 weeks before they made their decision?”

Mrs. CBT – “Yep!”

And there it is folks. One year to the date that this whole adventure began. I look back and still I can’t believe it has flown by that quick. From accepting the position to getting our apartment the next day, which was paramount I might add. Then telling all of our friends and family that we were “moving on up to the Upper East Side” and finding a renter for our joint on South Main. Let’s don’t forget that 1600-mile journey with me, momma and a poodle in a U-Haul that had a restrictor plate on it so we could only go 75 miles per hour to now current day. It has literally flown by. I look back on this time and still pinch myself because we certainly have accomplished a lot and I say beat the odds.

Backing up some – If you were to ask me 6 years ago when I was at a very low point in my life that could I ever see myself living in New York City, I would have told you that you were crazier than hell. I had just finished working as a carnie for MIM and went back to being unemployed but yet still had bills to pay. In those 6 years; we both made career changes, the wife got diagnosed and then kicked the shit out of breast cancer, we downsized into a condo and then we uprooted it again and moved to the city that never sleeps. Wow! That is some crazy shit you know?  This road has been bumpy at times but if you were to ask the both of us if we would do it over again I know the answer would be yes. At least for me, I bet that momma would like to avoid all that chemo and neuropathy stuff.

You have heard me reference my US friends who live in Belize and St. Thomas and how I have always admired them for what they did by moving to an island. They left the comfort of home, their friends and went down a path that wasn’t so worn. I have a deep admiration for two special friends down in Belize and their story. These two ladies left Indianapolis, left family, children & friends and started all over again in a foreign country to run a Bed and Breakfast. We met them a number of years back and have become great friends and try to see each other at least once a year. #FuckShobo (inside joke)

It wasn’t until we received an email from RDD or Shuffles that they admired what we did and how our move to New York was very similar to them when they moved to Ambergris Caye Island. I recalled looking at those words and it then hit me “Shit, why didn’t we find an employer that Momma could work for in the topics?” I am kidding by the way. I really was honored and respected those words. I never really thought about it like that.

There are a couple of you who have asked me why I refer to NYC as “that island called Manhattan” it for the above reason. We went out on a limb together and stuck our big toe in a very big pool of water. I can say that this experience has been exhilarating and scary at the same time for the both of us. Much like our friends in Belize it brought us closer to each other and made us better people.

Changing gears now – The first two months that we were living here we would both say to each other “I can’t believe that we live here in New York!” It wasn’t until the third month that it changed into “Why the Fuck didn’t we do this sooner!” Sure there are a ton of things that we miss by moving away from friends and family and it hasn’t always been smiles and dive bars. There have been some tears shed along this path but (I promise I am getting to my point) what are you waiting for? Why not do something as we say at work “Let’s turn this bitch on its head and see what happens?” I am not suggesting you move to a different city on whim, but start small instead. I am challenging you to do what you have always wondered “What if?” Let’s be honest, we all know the worst thing that can happen is that you fail. But if never try then do you always fail?

I will end this deep Hallmark post of a blog with the words of Steve Buscemi from Con Air; “Insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting different results.” Go do something insane folks, who knows what will happen.

FullSizeRender_1I do love that woman! Even if I have to stand on a curb to see eye to eye with her!

IMG_0579And that night a friendship was born. Love you RDD and Shuffles!

IMG_0580I mean seriously Mrs. CBT – Why couldn’t you get a job on this island for me to sell my wares? Is that a FedEx drop box I see next to that Palapa?

mugNipped this off the internet and it speaks volumes.

What are you waiting for?



Try the Tongue!

Back when I made my first visit to New York as an adult we were here to celebrate Mrs. Trumpet’s 30th birthday. On that visit we made a trip to the Carnegie Deli on 7th Avenue. I don’t remember much about that trip but I did remember when the Woody Allen sandwich came out and was placed on our table. Literally it was 2 full sandwiches and was piled high with Pastrami and Corned Beef. When we moved up here back in August the first thing we did was make sure we ate was at a proper Jewish Deli. Yes, I went with a  pastrami, salami, and corned beef sandwich. If you have never had one of these sandwiches then you really don’t know what you are missing. We have not eaten at Carnegie since it has reopened and will probably will wait till we have someone in town and need to play tour guide. I have tried a couple of joints up here so far; Ben’s, Pastrami Queen, Barney Greengrass, and right around the corner from is Second Avenue Deli. No we have not had Russ & Daughters or Katz’s and they are on the list so lay off Maria, I can see the finger poking :).

Saturday I was at the Cigar joint and one of the guys ordered a sandwich from 2nd Avenue and it looked damn good. The wife was heading back into town from a day trip to New Jersey and I was hungry so I swung by and picked up a sandwich. While I was there they gave me a couple samples of Pastrami and Corned Beef and I knew that I was in for a treat. I get the 3 pound sandwich and make my way home. Let me put this in words that you can understand. If I had a good Jewish deli in Memphis growing up and got introduced to pastrami and corned beef that is that good, I may have become a Jew. Right now RAB is snorting coffee  through her nose.

IMG_4385All the spreads and fish for the Bagels

IMG_4386I am sure this is healty

IMG_4389You have to have a Black and White Cookie

Oy Vey they serve some good food there and they don’t screw you on the half sour pickles.

New York Friendships

“Wait you are going to Philly for a One Year Old’s Birthday? You have more friends here in New York than I do and you moved up here in August!!” explained someone when he asked me what I was doing this past weekend. I don’t really know how to explain it, does this mean that Southerners are more social than people from the North? Let’s get to that debate a bit later. So how did two people uproot from their home town of 20+ years, move 1600 miles, start new jobs, and yet still have a great social life away from work? Well first of all, when we made the decision to move up to Gotham we both knew that we had a helluva friend and family network already in place. From our NYC Consigliore and all of her St. John’s classmates to the Asian Fireman and all of the NYFD buddies to even more new friendships, we really are lucky to have such a great circle of friends.

To give proper backstories way back some 22 years ago Mrs. Trumpet and OTB were drinking frozen boat drinks in Magen’s Bay in St. Thomas USVI while on a cruise. These two Brooklyn knuckleheads are trying to work their magic on these ‘southern belles’ and things were looking promising until Mrs. Trumpet looks at McNick and informs him that he has a booger hanging from his nose. Yep that was the start of the friendship with all of the St. John’s gang. On the cruise the Memphis girls meet Maria and it was on like Donkey Kong from then. We would vacation with the New Yorkers on Cruises, in Belize, New Orleans, Memphis, we even came up here for a cruise to no-where for a couple of days. I won’t mention all of the names for fear of missing one but we really are blessed to have this group of friends.

The other set of friends that we have was thanks to the guy who now lives in my old house in South Bluffs. You see RJ moved from Willow Grove Pennsylvania to be a tour bus driver at Graceland. With him came a whole bunch of ‘characters’ that I could at best could describe them. Hey Papua New Guinea Mike – Don’t worry the fountain picture is safely stored in a plastic container in the basement of our rental condo downtown. Thankfully the group of malcontents grew up, got married, started having babies and while we left RJ, Mallory, Baby Lisa Marie in Memphis we get to hang with all of his friends and expect him to start making some trips up here this summer. Again I won’t go into detail as I would probably leave one out and we know how bad one gets butt hurt when someone ‘swipes left’.

So you are thinking “hell, you guys got two great groups of friends, you are set” but it doesn’t end there. Now here is where I get two different distinct thought processes and opinions. You recall Miles from The Australian and the post I did about the people of New York? Of course you do, I still get the occasional text from my Bar Wife or Chef Stalker to see if I have been back to that bar and more importantly if he is still working there. For those of you wondering what I am talking about, from that post I reported that New Yorkers are stereotyped as cold, reserved and non-social and that isn’t the case. New Yorkers are instinctively friendly after you get past the first layer of puffy coat.

Since that post I have encountered some New Yorkers who do play the stereotype and are reserved and non-committal. With these people you have to really work in finding a common ground to build a relationship. Case in point is my Cigar haven on E73rd Street. I normally go in there to read the paper, watch a game and try not to engage in the political chat because it is like wrestling with a pig; you both get dirty and the pig likes it. We do get into some pretty good discussions there after you realize “Hey that guy who smokes $50 cigars and makes 2.4M/yr also thinks that children should say Mam/Sir to adults too.”

Sadly there some New Yorkers who won’t let you in or as I say “get up, go to work, come home & repeat” I don’t know it seems strange but I think it was a comment that one of my work cohorts once said to me that hit home. “You know CBT, New Yorkers are normally not ones to open up and keep to themselves unlike people from the South.” I took his comment with appreciation but I have to disagree. Mrs. Trumpet joined a wine club (BTW – Memphis you are doing Wine Club Wrong) and she enjoys it. I have begun friendships with some of my work cohorts and let me tell you, it is refreshing to talk about something other than work when you are grabbing a beer or bite to eat. Like I have said before a couple of times, we really are lucky to have such great friendships up here considering we are still less than a year in living here.

I leave you with an oldie but goodie saying that I have said many times before “A good friend will come bail your ass out of jail. But a great friend will be sitting next to you in jail saying “Holy Fuck that was fun!”  Keep it light and have a good day!

Bless Their Hearts – Walking in Greenwich Village

This past Friday we had great weather so rather than train or cab it, I decided to walk to my appointment from my new office in Greenwich Village. As I am walking down Greenwich Street I come up on a group of people from what I assume is the heartland who were being led by a tour guide. I could have passed them but I was way ahead of schedule so I more or less tagged along listening to the tour guide’s talk. I am assuming that this group was from an ultra-conservative church because the tour guide was really bringing up that The Village was the Bohemian capital and stuff like that. The guide was harping also on the LGBT movement and that back in the day the majority of lesbian and homosexuals lived in this part of town, again I was enthralled so I kept on listening and walking.

Tour Guide Timmy went on and on about the history of the Village and back in the day it was a different scene with drug dealers, prostitutes and stuff like that. Seriously I was really entertained by this guy and could only imagine what thoughts were running through the minds of the people listening to him. The tour guide then tells how the bars and establishments here were havens for rough crowds and how you didn’t want to be here when the sun went down. It was then I look up and see a familiar sign. Literally I start laughing out loud to the point that the tour guide even stops speaking. I cross the street as to not get accosted by the group but as I have said before “Bless their hearts!”

Below is the familiar sign that I see on the side of this building. I am kind of glad that this group won’t be visiting any of those “scary” Greenwich Village bars. More room for me at the bar to have a beer.

IMG_0975Yes folks that is the New York’s  Automatic Slims much like the one on Second Street in Downtown Memphis. Formally owned by my former boss Karen Blockman Carrier. I understand that they serve a good burger in this joint.

Oh and a side note – The West Village is one of the most expensive parts of town to live in.

CBT’s Public Service Announcement for Drinking on St. Patrick’s Day

“Wait, is a Southerner about to lecture The Irish and Honorary Irish New Yorkers on how to drink for St. Patrick’s Day? Jackass, please continue.” said every New Yorker this morning who just read that title while having their cornflakes and Guinness beer.

Now allow me to quickly retort before I get a shamrock shoved up my ass. I am not telling you how to drink; I am merely giving you some suggestions so that you won’t end up in the pokey or curled up next to some ugly arse girl/guy tomorrow morning. You are reading from someone who on a yearly basis survives The Memphis Festival Season so put that in your bagpipe and smoke it why don’t you. Memphis festival season starts in Early April and runs for 6 weeks till the week following Memorial Day weekend. Just to show that I ain’t afraid and still have the Big Balls, I schedule a yearly liver enzyme exam the day following Memphis Italian Festival. Oh and I pass that exam easier than I did College Algebra. No disrespect to you New Yorkers but if you think you got it in you, head on down to Memphis and get you some. I have seen more cases of MPH from out of towners after a big weekend than I care to think about. *DISCLAIMER – I normally do the same list for Memphis in May BBQ fest each and every year but this time I shall tweak the list. Without further ado;

  • It is a marathon, not a race. Sure we appreciate you drinking Irish car bombs 2 at a time but dude it is 6:30 in the morning. And those people who are in the same subway car with you are actually going to work and not the parade.
  • Her shirt may read “Kiss me I am Irish” but her boyfriend who is fetching drinks  won’t take too kindly when you lay the kiss of a lifetime on her. Oh and the boyfriend probably is on probation for anger management.
  • Your 4 year old son may love to take a whizz outside the house in Woodlawn but that doesn’t make it ok for you to do it on 5th Avenue.
  • Girls, they really are not wearing any underwear under that kilt. So if you are brave enough to take a peek you may see something you don’t want to see. I bet they haven’t ‘manscaped’ yet this season.
  • She may have the tits of a 20 year old but I bet she is actually 16 years old drinking on a fake ID. I bet there is a similar law up here to what they have in Memphis. If 1 goes into less than 18 that equals 10 years in Jail.
  • Ladies, they played for 4 hours and walked 100 city blocks blowing into a dead animal bladder. Let the Pipes and Drum boys get their drink on before you want a selfie.
  • Boys, I bet that she really isn’t into you that much but simply wants to cut in line for  the bathroom.
  • FOR THE LOVE OF GOD – PUT THE “APPROVE TAGGED PICTURE” OPTION ON YOUR FACEBOOK PAGE. There is always “that guy/girl” who takes a less than flattering picture. And if they still do, you may want to rethink your life choices and friends.
  • In general, leave the phone/camera at home. How many pics of a hot ginger female with nice boobs do you really need?  Shout out to Missy!
  • Eat a sandwich every 4 hours. They say that 90% of alcoholics die of malnutrition. Of course not my big ass. I eat another slice of pizza from my boys on 67th I may need a new zipcode.
  • If you get into trouble during the parade, just tell them you know The Memphis Fire Chief Benjie and that should do the trick.
Cannot believe they are going to let an Asian Fireman lead the Parade for the second year in a row. Talk about diversity! Good Luck Boys see you at the end of the Route!
Yeah I probably am going to have a couple of these today!



The North vs The South 2.0

I have not done one of my “North vs South” updates in a while so allow me put my reporting cap on. I was having a conversation with one of my work cohorts discussing the joys of having Fresh Direct grocery delivery service. For those of you who are unfamiliar with that, it is basically online grocery shopping that you can have your groceries delivered to your front door in 2 hour windows. The selection is great, the quality of fresh seafood, meats and produce is top notch. The prices are  better than the ass rape that they do over at Morton Williams, you can get beer and liquor delivered too and you don’t have to schlep it either. I was telling LZ that I like the service but there are a few items that I can’t get from Fresh Direct or have found in grocery stores. To get these items I have to source them from Amazon. “What can’t you get from Fresh Direct” inquired my work cohort?

“Well I can never find Rotel Tomatoes so I have to get them via Amazon or take a long walk to the local Gristedes Grocery Store.” I explained. It was here that the puzzled look comes out and I now have to explain to my Northern cohort “What the Feck is a Rotel Tomato”. I will stop here and break out a couple of lists for you to enjoy;

In the North

  • Drinks Seltzer Water because you don’t want the sugar. It is friggin bubbled water! In the South we call that shit Club Soda and we serve it with Vodka and a friggin lime!
  • The automatic hand dryers in the restrooms have Cat 5 Hurricane winds as compared to those sucky hand dryers you find in McDonald’s bathrooms. *The hand dryers at Bardog or Aldo’s are NYC approved if you are wondering WTF I am talking about.
  • If the Temp is in the mid 30’s with a 10 MPH wind but the sun is shining then BY GAWD it is a beautiful day. Case in point, I ate my lunch last week in the park while my hands were shaking from hypothermia but it was a beautiful day.
  • You don’t have canned Rotel Tomatoes, Velveeta Cheese in a 3 pound brick, carry quart size Iced Tea bags or have more than 3 kinds of BBQ Sauce in a retail bottle.
  • Think that putting Liquid Smoke on a chicken breast and cooking it in the oven is as good as Memphis smoked yardbird.
  • Think that the Non-Panhandle of Florida is the only acceptable place to vacation in Florida.

In the South

  • We use terms like “Hows ya Momma and them?”, “X got the snot kicked out of them by Y”, and my personal favorite “Mosquitoes so bad they could stand flatfooted and rape a turkey”!
  • We plan weddings around Football season and will declare that a marriage will end in divorce if it is on a big game weekend.
  • Wonder why bagels have to be so damned good up here and taste like shit below the Mason Dixon line.
  • Don’t have to take out a personal loan when drinking on a patio or rooftop. *DISCLAIMER – It has been a while since I went to The Peabody’s Rooftop Party*

IMG_0551“Are they similar to Beefsteak Tomatoes?” Check out that price per can btw

IMG_0552As served right next to the inch thick ribeye steaks

IMG_0547Oh how I love thee Nova with Scallion Cream Cheese on a Salt Bagel – NOT TOASTED


It is friggin Club Soda!

I hope you enjoyed this, we really do love living up here. We still pinch ourselves and are very happy we pulled this trigger.