Memorial Day BBQ – Woodlawn Style

On Sunday of Memorial Day weekend we headed up to Woodlawn for a Backyard BBQ and to see Lightbulb. The menu included Ribs, Pulled Pork and Chicken Lollipops. The weather was hit and miss because we had tons of rain earlier in the day but thankfully by the time we got to Woodlawn it was nice out. We hung out with the Asian Fireman and family and a good day was had by all.

Trust me when I say that the lollipops were just as good as they looked.

IMG_3285According to the Asian Fireman it took about an hour to prep these beautiful little bird legs.

IMG_3283Smoked Butter is applied to the chicken for the first 2 hours, then you dredge the chicken into BBQ Sauce and put on a wire rack to coat with goodness.

IMG_3282Wee Fiona damn near ate the bone too!

IMG_3281Callie sucked the marrow out of the bone and he almost bit me when I reached for my second.

Thanks to the Lee’s for a great time!

Pictures from Thanksgiving Week (didn’t take a lot of pics)

Had a lot of fun with friends who were in town over Thanksgiving Weekend.

IMG_2255It was kind of chilly and the crowds at Holiday Market on Union Square made my butt twitch so I needed a warmer and something to calm my nerves.

IMG_2243Walked to get EGP at Penn Station and snapped this picture. This is the front of Macy’s where they show the parade.

IMG_2244The Camera and Viewing Station for the Macy’s Parade

IMG_2247Best View of the Parade on Thursday. From the comfort of the couch with a coffee and on the couch.

IMG_2253Christmas decorations at Lillie’s on 17 Street. Hey RJ – We drank there!

IMG_2254If you don’t get into the holiday spirit after drinking here you have something wrong with you.

IMG_2250I thought that EGP was going to have a stroke when I purchased a Tall Boy Bud Light for the Train ride to Woodlawn. I told her it was tradition.

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving.

The Boogie Down BBQ on World Famous 236th Street!

You have probably heard me reference my friend RJ who lives in Memphis. RJ was originally from Pennsylvania but moved to Crime-Free Memphis as he wanted to be a shuttle driver at Graceland. RJ found himself a great woman (Let me rephrase that, Mallory, his wife,  is an effin saint) and they lived behind our house in South Bluffs. When we decided to sell Bar 595 he and Mallory bought it after we suckered hard sold JL (not Angry JL the one who can’t ride the majority of the rides at Disneyworld) into buying the house on Madewood to make the Ponzi scheme work. RJ’s best friend is the Asian Fireman and a whole bunch of other players who live near and around our vicinity. The Asian Fireman would come down each year for Memphis in May BBQfest so naturally they got the indirect smoking fever and sure enough some stick burners smokers have been purchased and reside in the Bronx and Glenside Pennsylvania.

A couple of years back the idea of The Boogie Down BBQ was born and a bunch of  Memphians headed up to 236th street and took over the house when the Asian Fireman’s wife was pregnant with C-Man. Can you believe we cooked all the food on just one smoker and a grill for 40 people?  After a trip to Glenside last year we headed back to 236th street and we were expecting a hungry crowd of 100 invited guests. We had 3 smokers and the grill and the menu included; Pork Shoulder, Baby Back Ribs, Spare Ribs, Beef Brisket, Beef Ribs, Chicken, Red Snapper and BBQ Nachos. The crowd came hungry and we delivered. A good time was had by all.

IMG_1718We must have elected a new Pope last weekend. Like a million of them

IMG_1717Prepping the Ribs

IMG_1719Loading the Smoker with Championship Ribs

IMG_1729Good to see Butchie who was in town for the day.

IMG_1732Me – “Um I smell something burning.” Asian Fireman – “Carbunkle, you need to lay off the sauce, there isn’t anything burning.” Me – “You were saying…..”

IMG_1710Pepe bossing us around from the chair

IMG_1708My buddy RJ, can’t wait to hoist a couple Cerveza’s down in Mexico!

IMG_1734The Spread for Dinner Service.

13697082_10154377130171214_6349630965306790063_nThe Backwood’s Smoker ish smoker. I could so use this sucker down on First Avenue.

13707714_10154377130246214_6399415964770970517_nBrisket’s being sliced.

IMG_1733Little Baby Priscilla Presley H is going to be the cutest girl in the Convent till she is 25!

It was a good time and I am glad to be enjoying some dinner that isn’t Hickory Smoked.






Memorial Day Weekend Recap

It started last week with various friends and coworkers asking; “You doing anything for Memorial Day Weekend CBT?”
“No, we are staying in the city over the weekend.” Not that there is anything bad with staying here but we are going to be out of town next weekend and needed to save our pennies.
FYI Memphis Friends – No we will not be at the Annual Italian Fest in Marquette Park this weekend. The truth of the matter is that I have not completed my “Speaking Northern 101” class yet but I am happy to report I am rocking the dark socks, sandals and a wife beater like a M’Effer!*
Now unlike my friends and coworkers who went to the beach or the Shore *why do New Yorkers say “Beach” and New Jersey folks say “Shore”* we stayed close to home and had a helluva weekend;

Friday night we went out to celebrate 19 years around the sun staying married to each other. We dined at Delmonico’s down in the heart of Wall Street and had a great meal and time. Part of this blog’s mystique is that I spin real stories and protect the names of the innocent. I will say that 19 years with Mrs. Trumpet has been a helluva ride and I look forward to the next 19+ years with her. Or at least until she figures out how to program the DVR and set up the WiFi connections then my ass is on the street.

Saturday we ventured up to see the Asian Fireman and his family and did a little BBQ’ing. *Remember New York Friends – BBQ by southern terms is cooking something indirect and utilizing smoke or vented heat. Grilling is cooking the same item over a direct heat source.* We had a good time up in Woodlawn and even the Monkey Heads got to enjoy running on grass and being outdoors.

Sunday we got to sleep in (well Mrs. Trumpet did) and tried to see “Manhattanhenge” where the sun lines up and is in full view of all cross streets. It only happens a couple times a year so naturally we celebrated it with beer! Sadly the cloud cover made for a no go of the sun peeking down the streets. Maybe next time.

Monday we chilled at home and again tried to see Manhattanhenge and again had cloud cover so no go. Fell asleep watching the Golden State game and now we have a two day work week!

STREET SHOTS-19You have to appreciate a joint that has been around for a while.

 IMG_1301When I worked at the Fancy restaurant in Memphis it amazed me for those who wanted Baked Alaskans. Naturally I had to have one for good measure.

IMG_1306We put “ole Blue” (the name of the smoker) through her paces on Saturday.

IMG_1313It gets any hotter then I will be telling C-Man to move over.

IMG_1308Got to love Fi, she is going to be a handful when she grows up.

IMG_1314Shoulder 1 is off the smoker

IMG_1316Smoker Two is off the smoker. *The reason for the cigars is that we were trolling a couple of our friends. We both know not to smoke a cigar while handling food.

FullSizeRenderAwww This makes me nostalgic for Memphis!

IMG_1322Manhattanhenge – FAIL!

IMG_1324Not a view down a cross street but this is up First Avenue. Love the way the buildings frame the street.

Have a good week!






CBT’s Public Service Announcement for Drinking on St. Patrick’s Day

“Wait, is a Southerner about to lecture The Irish and Honorary Irish New Yorkers on how to drink for St. Patrick’s Day? Jackass, please continue.” said every New Yorker this morning who just read that title while having their cornflakes and Guinness beer.

Now allow me to quickly retort before I get a shamrock shoved up my ass. I am not telling you how to drink; I am merely giving you some suggestions so that you won’t end up in the pokey or curled up next to some ugly arse girl/guy tomorrow morning. You are reading from someone who on a yearly basis survives The Memphis Festival Season so put that in your bagpipe and smoke it why don’t you. Memphis festival season starts in Early April and runs for 6 weeks till the week following Memorial Day weekend. Just to show that I ain’t afraid and still have the Big Balls, I schedule a yearly liver enzyme exam the day following Memphis Italian Festival. Oh and I pass that exam easier than I did College Algebra. No disrespect to you New Yorkers but if you think you got it in you, head on down to Memphis and get you some. I have seen more cases of MPH from out of towners after a big weekend than I care to think about. *DISCLAIMER – I normally do the same list for Memphis in May BBQ fest each and every year but this time I shall tweak the list. Without further ado;

  • It is a marathon, not a race. Sure we appreciate you drinking Irish car bombs 2 at a time but dude it is 6:30 in the morning. And those people who are in the same subway car with you are actually going to work and not the parade.
  • Her shirt may read “Kiss me I am Irish” but her boyfriend who is fetching drinks  won’t take too kindly when you lay the kiss of a lifetime on her. Oh and the boyfriend probably is on probation for anger management.
  • Your 4 year old son may love to take a whizz outside the house in Woodlawn but that doesn’t make it ok for you to do it on 5th Avenue.
  • Girls, they really are not wearing any underwear under that kilt. So if you are brave enough to take a peek you may see something you don’t want to see. I bet they haven’t ‘manscaped’ yet this season.
  • She may have the tits of a 20 year old but I bet she is actually 16 years old drinking on a fake ID. I bet there is a similar law up here to what they have in Memphis. If 1 goes into less than 18 that equals 10 years in Jail.
  • Ladies, they played for 4 hours and walked 100 city blocks blowing into a dead animal bladder. Let the Pipes and Drum boys get their drink on before you want a selfie.
  • Boys, I bet that she really isn’t into you that much but simply wants to cut in line for  the bathroom.
  • FOR THE LOVE OF GOD – PUT THE “APPROVE TAGGED PICTURE” OPTION ON YOUR FACEBOOK PAGE. There is always “that guy/girl” who takes a less than flattering picture. And if they still do, you may want to rethink your life choices and friends.
  • In general, leave the phone/camera at home. How many pics of a hot ginger female with nice boobs do you really need?  Shout out to Missy!
  • Eat a sandwich every 4 hours. They say that 90% of alcoholics die of malnutrition. Of course not my big ass. I eat another slice of pizza from my boys on 67th I may need a new zipcode.
  • If you get into trouble during the parade, just tell them you know The Memphis Fire Chief Benjie and that should do the trick.
Cannot believe they are going to let an Asian Fireman lead the Parade for the second year in a row. Talk about diversity! Good Luck Boys see you at the end of the Route!
Yeah I probably am going to have a couple of these today!



CBT’S Take on NYC Strollers

While I was back in Memphis, I went to the ‘soft opening’ of Lyfe Kitchen on South Main with some friends of mine. Their daughter, her husband, and granddaughter also attended and baby Kenzie wasn’t too sure how to take Uncle CBT. The kid was fine, she played at her seat and when it was time to head out she even blew me a kiss. We were leaving and they put Kenzie into one of those basic folding strollers. It took me a minute to comprehend what that contraption was and I could sense that Kenzie parents were wondering why I was looking at them with a puzzled look on my face. I tell K & K that I have not seen one of those folding strollers ever since I moved to New York. I inform them that on the streets of New York the strollers that the moms/nannies push are monsters and pretty much are rolling shopping carts.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love kids but does a 20 pound kid really need to ride around in a push cart that takes up roughly the width of half of a city sidewalk? My parent friends in Memphis have some of these carts but as mentioned before, Memphis is not New York City!  Pretty sure that my Memphis parent friends will be sending me shitty text messages right about now, but come on! We all know that when you are pushing baby Shamus into Barbeque Fest somewhere in bottom of that cart are many bottles of wine! *Yes I am looking at you D.R.* What drives me crazy is that up here in NYC, those double wide carts are carrying empty space or a bag of biodegradable diapers with organic breast milk.

Now here is my main bitch – those carts are great for the park and wide open spaces but leave those damned things at home if you have to shuttle the kid down 5th Avenue at say rush hour! Walk down a packed subway platform with a double wide…..you may get a “GFY” look by a short blonde haired guy from Memphis. Do that shit in Park Slope with 2 mommies’ walking side by side with double strollers like a snow plow….you may get throat punched!  So, again and don’t get me wrong, if you have to push junior mint down the street please try to do so in a single wide cart that you won’t need to hang a “WIDE LOAD” banner on your ass if walking down a Manhattan street.

61yCqhlx2HL._SY355_Here is the type of buggy that K&K were pushing Kenzie around in Memphis. Small, compact and foldable.

IMG_0459Stock Photo because parents kinda wig out if you take pictures of their kid on the street. Here is what I am referring to, this thing is the Soccer Mom SUV of carts. They are all over the place here in NYC

IMG_0308Snagged this pic in our laundry room of a cart. The owner was in the playroom next door but carts are not allowed in the playroom. This sucker is HUGE

IMG_0309See this plate? This is for the older sister/brother to stand on while Mom/Dad/Nanny is pushing their younger sister/brother down the street.

IMG_0310Not a bad idea, these are hand warmers for the cart for during the winter. Why didn’t I think of  that?

britax-double-stroller2Here is the cart that pisses me off to no end. I promise that you put two of these carts next to each other and there is no way you can walk down the street. Then the mommies get bent out of shape when people yell at you for clogging up the street.

otto_strollerparkingThe Majority of restaurants, museums, synagogues, and mothers day out don’t allow carts inside so it is not uncommon to see these things parked outside free for the picking.


 Here is Mrs. Trumpet pushing the Asian Fireman’s cart while Baby C & F were out riding the rides. I prefer this type of cart because it is single wide but double decker.

Hope you had a good laugh on this one.

You going to the Stinky Place today?

I have had a couple of my friends and readers inquire about my normal pattern of Facebook checking into “The Cigar Inn” over on E73rd Street. My canned response is “I can tell you about it but then I would have to kill you” and they laugh it off until they realize that I am serious….I am kidding folks. Back when we lived in Crime-Free Memphis we had a balcony overlooking Main Street that I would sit out and smoke many a stogie, hell I even had a TV with Comcast service out there. Now before you associate those stinky Swisher Sweets or Black and Mild that is not what I am smoking. My particular tastes is medium to mild cigar with a greater than 50 ring size and prefer Torpedo shaped cigars but even that has changed since moving to NYC. I don’t drink alcohol while smoking and only smoke when I can devote at least 2 hours because this is my relaxation and happy place. Back when we were in Memphis I would normally do this solo as Momma doesn’t like the smoke and this is where I would read, play on the tablet and stalk on social media.

When we moved up to NYC I was limited to locations to enjoy a cigar, you see smoking is prohibited in parks as well as any eating establishment so other than going to see the Asian Fireman in Woodlawn it was either the benches outside of Central park on 5th Ave or cigar bars. In Memphis I never really found a cigar hangout (traditionally a Cigar store) that I could call home. The Cigar Store on Union had some ‘characters’ that would frequent there that I never really felt welcome. I did enjoy the Cigar Store a block away from Beale Street but inevitability there would be “that guy” who wanted to talk to everyone and try to start arguments because he wasn’t held as a child. Then I found The Cigar Inn a block away from our apartment. 

The Cigar Inn has two locations and allows Cigar Smoking inside the establishment. They don’t serve alcohol or food but do offer some non-alcoholic beverages and has a decent espresso. When we moved up here, and since I was unemployed, I would head over there in the afternoon before Momma got home from work. Inside the joint on E73rd Street it has a front and rear Cigar Parlor that is divided by the merchandise cases and Cigar Lockers. Both parlors have 3 flat screen TV’s that will have sports, news or whatever you request shown on them. Just don’t ask to watch an SEC Football game the same hour that the Yankees are on because you will be told no. The rear Cigar Parlor is where some older gentlemen hang out and are quick to chastise you for wearing shorts and not long trousers. Yeah, I learned my lesson and I have since abided by the dress code. The downside to the back room is that it is very smoky back there and the older gentlemen are the type of people who want to win the 1.4 Billion Powerball for a tax break. Yeah, I am out of that tax bracket so I sit my ass up in the front room. 

The beauty and allure of The Cigar Inn is that no one is a stranger and what makes it unique is the different clientele who frequent the joint. You have white collar executives who are more than happy to smoke their cigars in their 4K suits and then you have blue collar workers who smoke double corona cigars with their steel toe boots on, pretty much all are welcome. Traditionally I am in there in the late afternoon or weekends so you normally see the same group of folks and as one can expect, there is some serious ball busting going on in there. What I love about place (Mrs. CBT calls it “The Stinky Place”) is that if you sit there long enough you can find a common bond or framework. I will carry my tablet with me but I find that I hardly look at it as I now watch Hockey on the TV or join in the conversation.  The only downside is that you do smell like an ashtray and you will get some stares in the Hospital owned apartment building while riding the elevator because you reek of smoke. Thankfully the head of Cardiac Surgery for the hospital is also a patron of the clubhouse so I can always blame it on him.

IMG_0284Here is the front of the store on East 73rd Street

348sFront Room – I had to nip this off of the internet as I am sure The Boys wouldn’t be too keen on having their picture taken and posted on this crappy blog.

E73rd-334-Cigar-Inn-TA002Merch Area – to the back is the Walk In Humidor and rear parlor. They have all kinds of gifts here, granted it will have to be aired out for a week but if you need a good “Guy’s Gift” give them a call.

The Week in Pictures

It was a good week last week. Here are some of the pictures from last week.

Have a good week and we will see you next week.

The Week in Pictures

Congrats to us on living 3 months on this island and we haven’t gotten run over by a cross town bus yet. Ok, enough with the words, here are the pics that I have snapped up during the past week.

IMG_9443My fellow Chef Stalker @Grainbingirl started giving me crap for not going downstairs to stalk Eric Ripert. I don’t have the heart to tell her that he and his wife live next door to us.

IMG_9446Marathon Sunday was pretty cool, next year we will do better.

IMG_9453Can someone please pick this $hit up?

IMG_9421We celebrated getting a Fed Ex package

IMG_9460New view during my lunch hour

IMG_9465Tall ass buildings for days

IMG_9470Found a new Primary Care Physician up here

FullSizeRenderShout out to @Gurleygurl as here is her and my boo Lionel

IMG_9482I still miss me some Tony

IMG_9483I could pull this off in NYC but Justin and AJ would beat me with these if I wore them in Memphis.

IMG_9484So here is where Gypsies shop for those outlandish outfits

IMG_9487Ping Pong in Bryant Park

IMG_9488Bryant Park

IMG_9490As seen in Bryant Park

IMG_9491From the depths of hell we emerge from the subway

IMG_9492The boys at the Cigar inn put some college football on for me.

IMG_9494We do love our “coffee” up here!

Hope you enjoyed the pics

Be there in 45 minutes to an hour – traveling by NYC Mass Transit

Back in Memphis we used to joke that it took only 15 minutes to get from point A to point B by car. Seriously, you needed to get to the airport from downtown – 15 minutes. Needed to head across the bridge to grab a 30 pack of beer at Walgreens from South Bluffs – 15 minutes. When we moved up here we were told by a couple friends that your normal travel window went from 15 minutes to roughly 45 minutes to an hour. This applies not only to driving/riding in a car/cab/uber but also to taking mass transit busses/subways/light rail trains. I here to tell you that I have tried this theory out and it stands true. My current job requires me to travel to LaGuardia Airport and the easiest and cheapest way is via the MTA buses. To get to work I grab the M15 n/b bus to 125th & 2nd Ave in Spanish Harlem and then transfer to the M60 Select Bus to LGA. Door to door is roughly an hour. I have made it in 35 minutes on a lucky day and also got delayed by traffic for an 1.5 hour trip.  Thankfully because of my OCD practices I always give myself 15 minutes so <knock wood> I haven’t been caught late.

Like with anything, there is always an exception to the rule. Exception Rule #1 – On the weekends the subway lines could be delayed/not running due to scheduled maintenance. This will really screw you up because if you forgot that a particular line isn’t running then yo ass is running late.

This past weekend I put a trip to see my Asian Fireman and his family to test; 

Started the clock when we hit the lobby

 Closest subway station to our house is at 68th & Lexington so we zig-zag the blocks on green lights to get there.

 Heading west on 70th street

 Crossing 2nd Ave @ 70th and here is our 86% completed 2nd Avenue Subway station. When completed, our walking commute will be cut in half. *Stop laughing J.M., M.L., D.S., J.L., & B.M. It will get completed before we all die, the Mayor told me so!

 Here is our station at the corner of 68th & Lexington Ave closest to Hunter College

 Took is 12 minutes to walk to the subway station. Granted this will go longer in rain, swamp ass heat or snow

 Thankfully this station is a one horse station (only one line) so today we need to head to 125th street & Lex to catch Metro North Light Rail

But you said that only the 6 train stops at this station, this says that the 4 & 5 trains stop here too? Did I mention the weekend exception earlier?

On the weekends the 4 & 5 trains run local so a normal 15 minute ride is taking more like 30 minutes

 We get to the Metro North Harlem station at 125th & Lexington and wait on our light rail train

 So far we are at 45 minutes, I am kinda glad that I factored in those 15 minutes.

 This can get tricky because if you don’t know the end destination you can end up on a train that is running express and you would bypass your stop.

 This is why I love those Mass Transit apps. It takes the guesswork out of this.

 All aboard the choo choo! Right on time!

 Metro North trains are nice and have comfy seats. Here it was pretty packed as Fordham was playing a home football game and the alumni were heading to the campus. I bit my tongue as these folks had just enough time to get to the stadium and not tailgate.

 18 minutes later we are in Woodlawn located in the Bronx and start walking to the Asian Fireman’s residence.

 Walking down Webster Ave

 And we have arrived!

 Like I said, it takes an hour! I ridden in a car to the same residence and with traffic it took 45 minutes.

*Editors Note – We were able to get to the Garment District from Woodlawn later that evening in under 40 minutes. Go figure!