Atlantic City Via Pictures

Because I really can’t describe some of the shit that I saw. Thanks to J for teaching me a new saying “Nutscape” and don’t google that on your work computer either!

IMG_0826Because Olives and Bacon for a Garnish isn’t just enough as a condiment.

IMG_0825Blue Cheese Stuffed Olives are really good

IMG_0823Been Craving Oysters for a while

IMG_0813One and Done here in spirit!

IMG_0805No that isn’t Iced Tea

IMG_0815Made it to Margate for a beer in the rain

IMG_0819Yep, he made the menu!

IMG_0820Espresso Martini’s are always a good idea. But why aren’t there 5 of them?

IMG_0824Coffee Drinks from Sam!

IMG_0843Yeah, I may be older than her but she has a bigger head than mine. Not as big as AJ’s sweater stretching noggin. 

Thanks for a fun trip Neighbor and Summer of B!

 

The “Don’t be that Guy/Gal” Guide to The World Championship Barbeque Cooking Contest

I post this every year. Yet someone ‘drinks his lunch’ at BBQ fest and they ‘pull a smoothie’ and isn’t heard from for almost a full day. The list from last year is right Here and if you plan on heading down there please read them. Now for this year I am going to change it up a tad. You see, I celebrate the fact that I am not on a team. It isn’t that I don’t like comradery and some good ball busting (I do that at the Cigar Inn enough) but I don’t like the idea of burning a week of vacation to work my ass off. Then there is always a chance I could lose a friendship over something silly and worrying if the team is going to remain in the black isn’t for me.

The dichotomy of a BBQ Team is a very fragile one. You have some people who want nothing to do with the cooking contest except for drinking for a solid week. You have some who are serious in the competition. Those are the ones who are traveling across the region each weekend and normally are not there so much for the party but for the competition. Normally in a given week there will be a blow up in the tent. I saw them numerous times when I worked for MIM some 7 years ago. My parents were original member of “Boss Pit” one of the first double decker rigs down there and a drunken argument lead to them leaving the team. Sadly I have seen teams disband because of the things that go on down on the banks of the river.

Oh don’t worry, the only thing that disbands are the members. The team name probably will go on but members move from team to team. My parents left BBQ Fest and moved it over to Italian Fest at Holy Rosary and it was a smaller contest. That being said, here is the list for those who are visiting BBQ Fest so that you don’t become “That Guy/Girl”;

  1. Don’t be a dick and try to BS your way into a booth if you are not invited. There are 250 teams, if you want to learn or see the interior of a booth I suggest visiting during the day either Thursday or Friday when it isn’t busy. When the sun goes down is not the time to get BBQ 101.
  2. If you see a tip jar for the team throw a couple bucks in the damn thing. Those Bud lights didn’t grow in Tom Lee Park and someone picked them fresh that morning. This also applies to the bartender who may get a split of the jar and heckles people to give money. When Shobo went one year, she carried her own wine in the park and got heckled for getting a cup of ice because she put a 5 in the tip jar.
  3. Don’t be an ass. It happens every year. The Germantown housewife who puts on her push up bra to bring the cans together gets silly on moonshine. She flirts with someone in the booth and they think that the “Awkward Touch” sign has been turned on in a booth. Next thing happens someone gets hauled out of the booth by an off duty cop and people are pissed.
  4. Friends of Friends don’t invite their own friends – This one just slays me to no end. There are 250 cocktail parties going on at the same time in Tom Lee Park. While you are walking to the tent that you are invited to you hear someone yell your name. This is a friend of yours who you haven’t seen in years but “We keep up on Facebook” and they are in a booth that you don’t know. Don’t be that “guy/gal” and ask them if they can get you in the invited party. It makes it weird for everyone.
  5. If you do happen to over indulge in refreshing drink – Don’t drive, wait it out for the 3 hours to get an Uber or cab. Then again I hear that T.O.D.D. is in town and he has a suite at the South’s Grand Hotel.

 

10384819_10152441353909170_1252489496298450880_nGoes without saying

Have fun and of course remember the password “Joe said he needs me to go get charcoal”

Is it a Sub, Hero, Hoagie, Grinder or Sandwich?

Made a trip to Atlantic City this past weekend to see “The Neighbor” and her husband. We also had a brief appearance by “The Gay Coke Dealer” for a one and done Friday night. We had a great time and on leaving AC we decided to grab some Subs at the world famous White House. I called the order in at 11AM to be ready at 2PM and I am glad I did. The story is that the doors opened in October 1946 and have been serving the New Jersey Submarine sandwiches ever since.

We opted for the Original and a Cheesesteak with and added sweet peppers. I walked into the joint and it is packed tighter than Dick’s Hatband. Between people waiting for table service, to go orders there isn’t much room to move around. I ask the waitress where I go for call in orders and she tells me to head to the back by the walk in freezer. I go back there but I am stuck in the ‘Go Order’ line and ask again. Literally I had to go into the kitchen to get my order. I tell them my name and they hand me two baseball bats wrapped in paper.

We make our way home and after some beers at Iggy’s we decide that it is time for the Subs. Even cold they sandwiches were unbelievable and the Bread…..Oh the Bread that my friends is what makes this a great sandwich.

IMG_0827Homeslice wasn’t too crazy that I was taking pictures but I told them that I knew the Gay Coke Dealer and all was forgiven.

IMG_0836You can’t understand how big this sucker is by this angle.

IMG_0835I had to get out the Stanley Black and Decker Tape Measure for this.

IMG_0837This is about 6 inches of the Original for us to eat. Knock it off Nova – I know what you are going to say.

IMG_0838The Philly and Here is when I realized they forgot to include the Sweet Peppers.

IMG_0839We still have plenty of sandwiches to eat the rest of the week.

Thanks to the Neighbor and her welfare receiving husband for a great time and we will see you again soon. As far as the Margate Dad…..You know that I still love you!

 

 

Picked up another badge yesterday

You remember the Swarm app that was all the rage a couple years back? It probably still is but my ADHD got the best of me and I moved on. One of the things that everyone was trying to get were the badges. At first it was the Swarm badge then I guess mayorships was the next thing everyone went after. I kind of got self conscious when the app would tell me that I have checked into a bar X times in a row in a given week. To be the mayor of one bar was fine but 5 of the main downtown bars….. yeah that may be a cry for help. 

The team that I work with selling double decker bus tour tickets to tourists has a “group chat” thread that we use regularly.  Normally it is for a specific question that one of the 8 on the team can answer. Sometimes the thread can get silly such as “when and where we are going to meet for an hour of happiness” or something similar. Yesterday the thread went the way of celebrity stalking. You have all read about my seeing different celebrities and stuff like that but there has alway been that one purple unicorn that I never could find. The celebrity in question; Jerome Allen “Jerry” Seinfeld. 

If you haven’t picked up yet, I am a big fan of the show. Now that we live up here the show even hits home more since we picked up on the little nuances that is living in New York. To see Jerry Seinfeld in New York is like running into Regis Philben or in my case Eric Rupert. *Grainbin Girl – guess who petted white dog since her blind ass ran into his shoe waiting to get into the Citibank ATM.* Don’t hate the player. 

Anyway like I said earlier, the group thread went to celeb stalking yesterday when DM reported that Seinfeld was on the corner of E57 & Madison and included a photo. I was meeting DM and some others a block from that area so I made it a point to swing by and sure enough there he was shooting a commercial. 


I guess the only one I left on my New York scorecard is Drea De Matteo and Uncle Junior. 

Apple be Racist – Fun times on the Q Train to Times Square

I must have had the Jackass magnet on when I left the apartment Monday morning. I knew it was going to be a ‘special’ day when I walked out of the building and one of the little fuckers sweet children in the building rolled over my foot on his Razor. I did feel better when accidently ‘hip checked’ him into the planter. That aught to teach him a lesson.

But I digress. I made my way to the Q platform at E72nd street and got to the middle of the platform. For some reason the Q was packed yesterday morning. I shoehorned my ass on the train and found a spot next to one of the center poles. As the doors were shutting, I heard the sound that all New Yorkers groan. “Excuse me everybody, I apologize but I…..” as an older African American male went into his story of how he hit on hard times. Normally the speech and the time to walk through the subway car to get any change given by passengers is about the same time it takes to get to the next stop.

Unfortunately for us, we had a delay heading to the E63rd & Lexington station. So skillet was still in our subway car and then it happened. I was minding my own business listening to some Ludacris and I hear the gentlemen go into a rant yelling at the top of his lungs. “You Mudda Effers are all a bunch of Racists. You stand there judging me with your white earbuds in your hears. You all are a racists and Jesus won’t help you on judgement day.”

I really don’t know how to come back with that zinger other than “Bless your heart”

IMG_0794Here I am in my “Racist” earbuds but I am rocking my black suit and black tie ala Reservoir Dogs

Go forth and have a good day folks.

 

Pictures of the Week

Hodgepodge of pictures this week. Dominican Republic and then Trump visits NYC. It has been a busy week.

presidenteBeer4.htmThey had a run on Presidente Beers while we were there. Even if Eddie Money’s fan drank Pink drinks and Coors Light.

IMG_0735Painting Fail

IMG_0747Departure Lounge in Dominican Republic – Of course the effin sun came out!

IMG_0746That is a flood of Rainwater by the way. It got biblical down there!

IMG_0700Went to a Yankees game in the Suite. We don’t eat well there. #sarcasm

IMG_0698Chicken Tenders and Mac n Cheese – You sure this isn’t the suite at AutoZone Stadium?

IMG_0697Sushi at a Baseball Game? Sure why not!

IMG_0719Automatically makes you feel happy just seeing a bunch of balloons you know?

IMG_0745Shower Beer was in full effect down in the DR!

Have a good weekend!

I have to come clean to my Memphis Readers

*Fade in to a large room with people sitting on folding chairs in a circle*
“Hello, my name is Carbunkle Trumpet and I am now a New York Rangers Hockey Fan.”
“Hello Carbunkle Trumpet!”

I guess I am going to have to call my mother and father and break the news to them that their first born has officially turned. I hope my dad takes it gently. I know that he had high hopes for me. My Mother, she will be devastated. For you 9 readers, this is what happens to Memphis Grizzlies fans when they get bounced from the first round of the playoffs.

Lets go back to when the Hockey bug started in me. It was back two January’s ago when I attended my first Hockey Game in MSG and it was AMAZING! Then I started to watch the games periodically when I was hanging with the boys at the Cigar Inn. This winter, I would find myself at the Cigar joint when the Rangers were on and I started to watch it out of the corner of my eye. Doc would sit in front of the big screen and would add commentary and I would pick up a couple of pointers. 

Then I started following @NYRangers on Twitter and picked up more useless information. Next thing I knew what icing was (I thought it was the stuff on a cake) and even recognized offsides. When the Grizzlies were playing the Spurs we noticed that when the Grizz were on the same night as the Rangers they both won. I even had the boys put the Grizz game on one of the smaller TV’s (if the Mets or Yankees were off) and started getting some traction on my claim of double wins.

The Grizz were eliminated and Tuesday night I was sitting at the Cigar Inn and started to realize that I was into it. I really was starting to recognize shots on goals, line changes, dirty plays and even power plays. It came to me last night when I was sitting there and even knew what time the game started,  who the Rangers were playing and who was leading the series. When Oscar Lindberg scored the second goal in the second period I yelled out in jubilation. My friend Alex was quick to bust my chops;
“Oh you are a Rangers fan now? I don’t know if I can stomach someone with a Southern accent cheering for a New York team. Knock that shit off!”

So there you go. The series is tied up and we head back to Ottawa (don’t ask me where the F that is) for Game 5. I may paint my chest this Saturday. Just make sure someone checks on my folks. They are probably grieving that their son has turned to the dark side.

IMG_0706Getting ready for Game 3

Anne-Burrell-Attending-the-New-York-Rangers-Game--03-300x420I can’t believe that I am cheering for the same team as she is. I am sure that Grainbin Girl is spitting her coffee out right now.

5rJUyyNz_400x400How sweet will it be when I text Pucci asking her “Who has the Cup?” when the Blue Shirts win Lord Stanley’s Cup but I fear that “Costa Reaper” may disown me for not cheering for his Left Coast Team.

IMG_0765I even have Fecking Gear now! This won’t bode well with my Memphis Buddies…..at all!

Memphis Parents, start paying attention to what your kids are watching. There may still be hope for them.

In the Meantime – LETS GO RANGERS!!!!!!!!

 

“I would rather go to Afghanistan than to see Eddie Money with you.”

Relax to some new of my FB friends who we met down in the DR. *who am I kidding, nobody reads this shit* Carbunkle doesn’t kiss and tell. For you 9 readers who have wondered where the hell I have been, we just returned from a quick trip to the Dominican Republic. We went down with some friends from PA and some of their invited guests. We had a blast and look forward to seeing them again at the Philly BBQ Bash this summer.

I had decided that I wasn’t going to snap a lot of pictures this trip for a couple reasons. First of all I needed a mental break. Secondly, other than S&K and Virgil I didn’t know anyone else in the group. I mean, they love that I sell tour bus tickets to tourists in the UES but someone may lose their shit like if they just found out that their child was on the roof of their home if I posted some proprietary stuff from that weekend. Here are a couple pics that I did snap.

IMG_0736Yes we are New Yorkers, Yes we are in the Dominican Republic, Yes those are Bud Red Top Beers, Stop yelling KLC Man. The Presidentes were hot that morning.

IMG_0741No I was not vacationing with the owners of the Kooky Canucks, this little fella starting drinking on Thursday morning and got more obnoxious every hour since then and hadn’t stopped. *picture taken on Sunday afternoon. #Blessyourheart #nahGoFeckYourselfdude

IMG_0740Laugh all you want at my drink but I saw these take down the ticket holder of some Eddie Money tickets late this week.

IMG_0739Overachiever Alert!

IMG_0738They didn’t have Shrimp Sticks or Sushi on Thursdays.

IMG_0743Remember the pic of the Canadian Maple Leaf towards the top? Here is his girlfriend who wanted to celebrate her 30th on the 30th in the DR. I don’t see her making it to her 40th. #blessyourheart

I will do better, I gave my work wife my Met Gala Passes since we didn’t get back till late on Monday. Hopefully she has some great pics.

 

What the? A Bonus Post? You working from Home CBT?

Nope, I was able to secure some time on the laptop last night. You see between Momma’s skooling the Commodore 64 computer is pretty much always in use. Last night as I was watching Playoff Hockey at the Cigar Inn I might add I was able to bang out a couple posts since I have been slacking.

IMG_0677UWS Holly – Can you explain why I ‘had’ to have a picture of your food? Doesn’t matter, oh and our waitress from Friday night at that joint in the LES is the hostess at Fig & Olive in Midtown. She called me out on today at lunch.

IMG_0678Took EGP to see the Fearless Girl.

IMG_0679I am taking that when we got to our fancy dinner this Christmas.

IMG_0685No Smartasses, this isn’t a stock photo. I took it when EGP and I went to Easter Mass.

IMG_0683This is one of the reasons I needed to visit St. Patrick’s on Easter Sunday.

IMG_0682Why can’t we have nice things? I don’t need much space in this sucker.

Have a good weekend.

 

Loser Lounge Tribute to George Michael

It has literally taken me a full week to finally formalize words to describe what I saw this past Friday. We have seen many a good losers lounge tribute. The Elton John Tribute back in the late 90’s was right up there with the best show seen. That was until this past Good Friday.

From Anna Copa Cabanna starting the set on a patrons table singing “Wake me up before you Go-Go” to Kalia Floreska’s version of “Careless Whisper” it was a helluva show. Naturally “Freedom 90” with the entire cast dancing with the audience was fun then there was “I want your sex”. Let me jus say that it is good to know that EGP is one of us because when dude threw down his velvet coat and revealed the banana hammock and assless chaps…..I am glad to know I won’t be the reason that EGP needs therapy when she gets into her mid 30’s.

Probably the funniest/off color song was Julian Maile’s “Heal the Pain” where he gave the great line “So Jesus died today but he will be back in 3 days. Pretty much anything goes!” Oh come on, you laughed at that. I know you did.  I am going to stop right there because I hear thunder in the distance.

IMG_0658I have seen some interesting Tie Bars before but this one looks a little restricting.

IMG_0659Danya Dantzler belting out “I knew you were waiting”

IMG_0660 - CopyAnyone wearing an 18″ cross around your neck on Good Friday has to know how to party right?

IMG_0663You know they have to have “Careless Whisper” the iconic saxophone George Michael Song.

IMG_0665Freedom 90 Dance Party Song!

IMG_0666The Losers Lounge Back Up dancers

IMG_0670CiCi James singing “Everything She Wants”

IMG_0672EGP Selfie shot

IMG_0673Brother Brooks, why don’t you say hello? I am 10 feet from you.

Have a good weekend. It is RoboPalooza this weekend as Momma is out of Town!