Lower East Side

The Best of New York by Carbunkle Trumpet

Another subtitle of this post should be “Your sisters ass! That is not the best!” because I am going to get some potential comments from the peanut gallery.

Hope everyone had a great holiday weekend and that nobody is learning how to open up ketchup bottles with their elbows or feet. I came up with this post a couple of years ago and I figured that given we have moved 4 times in almost 7 years I have a ‘fair’ understanding of some of the “Best of New York” So lets get into shall we…

The Best Bagels in New York (Might as well upset the apple cart right off the bat) with this category.

There are some who say that H&H is the best.
There are some who say that Best Bagels on 37th Street is Number One
Staten Island Sam swears that there is a bagel joint over on the island of Staten that is worth taking the ferry.
Former NY/NJ resident San Pedro Scoop swears by Murrays in Chelsea.
Other notables are Tompkins Square, Tal Bagels, and Bagel Works in the UES
However, I feel that the fellas over at Smith Street Bagels in Cobble Hill Brooklyn edge everyone out by a hair. Make sure you order – Everything Bagel, NOT Toasted, Scooped, Scallion Cream Cheese, Add Lox, Red Onion and a bottle of Hal Seltzer. (You are welcome)

Best Deli/Sandwich Shop for a Hoagie/Hero (I am not debating the name here folks)

Defonte’s in Red Hook Brooklyn (first lunch I ever had in New York) is right up there. So good
Katz, Pastrami Queen, Ben’s Kosher – I could spend hours on this this one.
I tried Pisillo Italian Panini on Nassau Street and that also is a good one as well.
Tourists swear by Rupert Jee’s Hello Deli next to the Ed Sullivan thanks to David Letterman but I have not tried it.
I have not been there but Cugine swears by John’s Deli in Brooklyn. Same for Federoffs Roasted Pork in Brooklyn.
I am not even looping Lenwich or Pot Belly into this category, stay in your lane.
But in my Humble Opinion down in the West Village is Fiacco’s On Bleeker street is the Best. The Italian Hero is so good as well as the Chicken Cutlet, Fresh Mozzarella and Roasted Red Peppers. Also if they have the Roast Beef with Broccoli Rabe get that as well.

Best Place to Take Out of Towners on the Cheap (if you have one that I missed please speak up)

Staten Island Ferry (hear me out Mr. 3 First Names before you blow up my phone) for cheap 2X4’s of beer that you can drink on board and you get a great view of the Statue of Liberty and lower Manhattan.
Long Island City over in Queens or take the Tram to Roosevelt Island – here you can get killer views of midtown Manhattan and it is a very nice place to walk around.
Double Decker Buses originating from Times Square – We have done this a couple times and I have to say you get an audio tour of Manhattan as you travel either uptown or downtown. You can also hop off but I would suggest you don’t because you almost never get back on the bus.
Times Square/Brooklyn Bridge – if you have to go there then do it in the morning when the crowds are not as prevalent. And yes Native New Yorkers despise going into Times Square. Probably at the height of the pandemic it was so strange to see it so empty.
Again I could go on for hours but I think that (and you have to study up) but when the Metropolitan Museum of Art has a special you should go during the summer and check out the rooftop on a Friday.

Best Dive or otherwise Classic New York Institution Bar (so going to take shit for this one from SO many) Now this category is very dear to my heart because I love me a good Dive Bar. The translation of a dive bar can be loosely categorized but to me dim lighting and a certain je ne sais quoi of the smell makes a dive bar. Oh and cash only bars too!

Rudy’s in Hell’s Kitchen – Look for the pig on 9th Avenue and get a free hotdog
Jimmy’s Corner in Times Square (yes I am going big balls here folks) best cheap drinks in Manhattan and thank God his son kept Jimmy’s open after we lost him to Covid.
Iggy’s in the UES – spent many a time in this one folks. It reminds me of Max’s Sports Bar but on Steroids. Oh and they have Karaoke at night too!
Billy Mark’s West – Bourdain loved this place
Subway Inn – Another Bourdain favorite and very good at Buy Backs.
Nancy Whisky Pub in Chelsea – My 6’9″ fraternity brother and I solved a lot of problems in this bar before Covid.
If you find yourself out on Rockaway make sure you swing by Connolly’s for a frozen drink.
Hanks in Brooklyn (NOW CLOSED) this place was great but they moved it to a new location and naturally you can’t re-create that dive bar feel.
Brooklyn Ice House in Red Hook or Sunny’s Bar also in Red Hook – really good dive bar
Old Town Tavern – Not so much a dive bar but a great NY institution. Old School bartenders who don’t mince words.
The Campbell – In Grand Central Station – just bring lots of cash
I literally could go on for hours and not even have to text Mr. 3 First Names or Lady Barrister for the names of the others I have forgotten so here goes. Best Dive Bar has to be Milano’s on Houston Street for that classic Beer and a Shot. Now for New York Institution I have a tie (one stole the concept from the other one so they are the same) and it goes to The Commissioner in Park Slope and Whisky Tavern in Chinatown. You can’t beat them and the staff is always on top of their game.

Best Pulled Pork, Ribs, BBQ Chicken, Sausage & Cheese Plate in New York

There isn’t one, the same can be said for finding the best bagel in Memphis TN.
No seriously, there isn’t and the same can be said for Cajun food, I have not found any that are as good as in NOLA.

So how are we doing folks? You ready to see an all out war of comments on my social Media Pages? So without further adieu Best Pizza (Slice or Whole) in New York.

Joe’s (multiple locations) have plenty of tourists flocking to them for a simple slice
John’s of Bleeker – whole pizza only and this is a good one as well.
I have heard a lot of people talk about Rizzo’s in Astoria Queens but have not been there yet. Yo Stagie and Tater’s Mom can you confirm this for me please?
Now our trusted Consigliere Maria swears by her beloved DiFara in Midwood Brooklyn and I have had this and it is a good one for sure.
Whit’s End in Rockaway is a good one, quirky but good.
Same for Grotto Pizza down the street from us but there can only be one at the top.
I have to thank our former doorman Luciano for this suggestion but NY Pizza Suprema tucked right behind MSG gave us the best slice and whole pie. Don’t hate the player, hate the game.

No comments about the ketchup on my hotdog, I was at a weak moment in my life.

Hey Kid, get the F out of here with that Crap!

So feel free to let me know your thoughts, obviously I didn’t go too deep in the Best of the Best but I hope that you had a fun read.

I told you I was running out of Material Up here!

I am glad to know that in the middle of a Pandemic the East Village still has their grit!
You keep it funky East Village and the same for you Lower East Side!

Why is he starting out with a picture on his blog today? So that picture above was sent to me by Sweet Melissa the Bama fan who happened to be raised by LSU parents. Yeah, you try to figure that shit out.

I replied back to her – that I wished it was me because the last time I set foot in the borough of Manhattan was 43 days ago. I admit that I try to keep my Subway awareness sharp and repeat the subway stops from say Nevins to say Grand Central in my head. (Nevins, Borough Hall, Bowling Green, Wall, Fulton, Brooklyn Bridge – City Hall, Canal, 14St – Union Sq, Grand Central – 42nd)

This then led into a discussion of how NOLA residents were coping with not having the first week of Jazz Fest. I mean all the food, the culture, and the fun but thankfully WWOZ is streaming Jazz Fest on Alexa. The old neighbor (God I bet her recycling is off the charts right now) was informing us how she now pulls up to grocery stores and they load her groceries in the back of the car and she goes on her merry way. Same for Lowes and Crawfish runs for Sweet Melissa. Welcome to the new norm.

Ok I have tormented them enough. Please notice I didn’t anger the AGM/my old prom date. I don’t need a Pucci Ban right now, I got enough shit on my plate.

So yesterday we didn’t really feel like doing much. I let Geranium sleep in because, well she loves her some sleep. One of our goals during this is that we are trying to reduce our carbon footprint and also conserve food and reduce our waste. Recall that Post about our Fresh Direct FU? So we, on that order, got cut chicken and for some reason we got a head of broccoli.

We decided to make this Broccoli slaw recipe that Geranium makes and we both like. Sadly we needed a red onion, shredded cheese and carrots so we figured we would go this morning since it is shitty weather and yesterday was a nice day and the streets were packed. Yesterday I was taking Maya out and also swinging by Wright & Goebel to get some more rum that I ordered online. I ran into our 38th floor neighbor who was heading out. She asked if we needed anything from Brooklyn Fare so I took her up on getting those 3 items. What can I say, New Yorkers are getting pretty resourceful.

You know if this is going to be the new normal, Geranium and I may think of moving to someplace cheaper and with more square footage.

Melissa said it was great weather yesterday.

I can empathize with her. Geranium and I are craving oysters right now.

Distance from her spot to the fence yep that’s our apartment.
Disclaimer – I actually enjoy looking at peoples yards and pools. I find it therapeutic.

Building is 33% occupied and one of our fucking high rise elevators is on the fritz?
Would someone please return the “Brady Bunch” Hawaiian idol back to its rightful place and end this shit?

So what are your COVID-19 Hacks? I think I have mentioned that I am going stale here.

For Example – I heard if you clean your glasses with white foamy shaving cream it will help prevent them from fogging up. It actually works.

Shoot me a message and I will post them.

And thanks Sweet Melisa for letting me post your pictures. When this is over I am coming there and we are going to drink like its our JOB!

So What Are You Watching/Listening To These Days.

The other Day (I think it was Saturday) LJZ texted me saying that she was bored and thinking of opening a bottle of Rose. I told her that by her texting me at 6:32AM that she needed to go find chores and that she couldn’t start drinking till the Tall Pines Show that evening.

She asked what I was talking about so I sent her an Instagram Link that the husband wife combo called The Tall Pines was putting on another show that evening from their rooftop on the UWS. I also told her about DJ Mickey Perez was going on that evening. I have seen him spin at Robert Bar when we were allowed to go outside. Also booked that Saturday was one of my favorite singers from Losers Lounge, Leslie Goshko was playing her virtual Piano slot live from her apartment.

LJZ was enthralled as to why I know all this worthless stuff. I told her that the majority of those performers were from Losers Lounge shows. I am sure you have seen me post about them from the past. So in an effort to give you some value to this blog I am going to share with you what live virtual shows we enjoy and where you can find them.

DJ Bobby Smith (Facebook Live) – Good friend of mine who spins it old school from Club Corona. His camera person is his wife T and we love them both. Shows are always on Friday and in an effort not to F this up I encourage you go to his page and he will post the time.
Leslie Goshko (Facebook Live) – She will play on Sid’s Gold Piano Bar and she is a regular on the Losers Lounge Show. Her co-worker Tater (the cat) has been known to make a cameo. She plays on Saturday and I think Thursdays but go over to the Sid’s Gold Piano and they will push the info to you.
Heavy Light Show (I heart Radio – WDST – Radio Woodstock) this actually is a live radio show that goes on from 7pm to 10pm eastern. Ida the DJ really plays some good stuff. Give that a look too!
Joe McGinty (Facebook Live) – He is the owner and founder of Losers Lounge and co-owner of Sid’s Gold Piano Karaoke Bar in the East Village. He plays on Thursday’s from the Sid’s Gold page and it is nice to see him play a freaking baby grand piano!
Tall Pines (Instagram Live) – Husband wife team that plays from their roof. Connie is a back up dance on Losers Lounge and they put out some great music. Go like them and they can post when they are playing
DJ Mickey Perez – (Instagram Live) – Cuban Latin American music that is really cool since I have not a lot of exposure of it. Like him on Instagram and he will let you know.
Jason D. Williams (Facebook Live) – The one and the same Jason D. Williams who got his fame from playing the piano at Mallards in the Peabody Hotel. Like his page and he will let you know when he is playing. A must watch for my fellow New Yorkers.
Crazy Canucks Beach Bar Hermit Crab Races – (Facebook Live every Tuesday at 7PM Eastern Standard Time) – Put it this way, there are not words that I can describe this. Husband & Wife Team who do virtual Hermit Crab races and they take venmo to give to their staff. Do this and you can see a big man rocking a pair of Pink Crocks!

What else are you going to do while you drink?

New York Folk – Go find him on Facebook and Like his page.

Always a good show and who doesn’t love Prince

Always a good show and she rocks a Tambourine!

You never know who is going to sit in on Leslie’s set

I kid but these two do good things down in Belize for so many! Tuesday Nights

So what are you watching/following these days?

We Are NY Tough

I was standing outside waiting on the dog to pee Thursday morning and I felt a subway rumble under the sidewalk and it almost startled me. I hadn’t seen a subway platform for over 28 days. From my “office” I can see the B & Q train on occasion going over the Manhattan Bridge but that’s it. We are now 26 days in lockdown and I am starting to forget the little things that make this city so great. The things that normal people skeeve that are just part of life for New Yorkers.

So there is a video clip that someone made of Cuomo’s speech. I encourage you to go seek it out. It is titled “NY Tough” grab a tissue it will put a tear in your eye.

There are two parts that really hit home. “You have to be smart to make it in New York“ The Second part is equally strong “And because we are New York Tough. We are tough, you have to be tough. This place makes tough. But it makes you tough in a good way. We are going to make it because I love New York. And I love New York. Because New York loves me. New York loves all of you. Black and White, Brown and Asian, Short and Tall, gay and straight. New York loves everyone. That is why I love new York.” Incidentally Maria informed me that I got my New York Pin so I guess I got that going for me.

So I put on my reporter hat and asked a bunch of my fellow New Yorkers (via email, text, Instagram) a question – “Once we get out of this what is the one thing you are going to do?” I will start off;

Carbunkle Trumpet – I plan on sitting with the old Chooch’s at the Cigar Inn on Second Avenue and smoke an Arturo Fuente Opus X ($75 a stick) hell I may smoke two of them at the same time! I might even debate the Chooch’s about Trump. (highly discouraged as they are all red hat wearers)
The Notorious N “M’effin” G – Make a reservation at Carbone and have every single person I have ever met over to my apartment to pre-game.
The work wife (The international one) – I am going to day drink by the pool or beach with no social distancing and then go out to eat every night for weeks because I am already tired of cooking every single meal.
My Cubical Roomate in the West Village – See my friends and do whatever we can as a group. Oh and join you on Second Avenue too!

I recall a baseball game right after 9/11 and they showed the back of the camera and it had this sticker. This is my iPad stand I put that sticker on it on Friday March 13th. That is the last day that New York was normal.

My Haitian Brother from another Mother not wishing to be from PA – Talking to everyone on the Train at Grand Central and having lunch with my work brothers and sister at Sophies and Blue Smoke and drive the kids to school. (he has 2 young ones and a wife that works in a medical lab – make sure you pour one for him)
Tarheel M(squared) – Drink an overpriced iced latte on my way to boozy brunch in the East Village then day drinking all day!
Shawneen from Middle Village – I am going to visit my family and hug and kiss them with no fear!
M(Squared) the former work wife (the domestic one) – Response pending
The Cruise Queen – Going to a nice restaurant after I get my hair done.
Geranium’s Work Wife – I am going to head down to Paddy McGown’s Pub drink buckets of Busch Light cans with friends and sing along (way out of key) to all our favorite songs on Touch Tunes.
Don Bruni – I am going to hop on a plane and hit an island somewhere. Work phone in a lock box in my bedroom.
The Credit Queen – I am going to NEVER again get pressured into buying ginormous amounts of toilet paper. Drink more prosecco, pay attention – really pay attention at Mass.
Bikinisareforever – Yankees Game
Asian Fireman – Going to the Rambling House for a proper pint of Guinness.

Rush hour on the Manhattan Bridge – Yep that is a FedEx Truck

AB the LSU Tiger Fan – Go to Nat Sherman for 2 Metropolitan Host Maduro Hyde and smoke it in Bryant Park while enjoying a few 24oz Ice Cold Corona Mortar shells and polish off a few dirty dishwater dogs. YOU CAN ALMOST HEAR HIS ACCENT WHEN YOU READ THIS.
Bobcat – Peter Lugar Steakhouse in Brooklyn and see her sister
The Professor – Swing by 773 Dive Bar, Palace Dive Bar, Connie O’s Dive Bar and Call Box (yep you guessed it another dive bar)
Homeless Tim – Fried Chicken at TAK Room and sit down and eat it properly. *he got that for Takeout when he fled the city for CT*
Lady Barrister Murphrank – Commissioner, Fausto, Osteria Morini (Italian Joint in the City) as that was the last place she ate before the city went on pause.
Mr 3 First Names – A repeat Trip up 5th Avenue (its a FDNY Pipe’s and Drums band thing)
AV The Russian – Take the subway anywhere and have a nice boozy brunch outside at a restaurant while touching every single person I see.
AV’s Momma – After I give my daughter an unending hug and shed some tears, Ima getting a huge juicy burger and eat it down by Battery Park across from the Statue of Liberty. I LOVE THIS ONE
Flynn Shady – Drinks at Down The Hatch in Greenwich Village and a slice of pizza at Joe’s,
PC the Memphis Fan – Queens Comfort in Astoria and get rousingly drunk at hip hop brunch then walk it off along the East River.

I don’t know what scares me more. That Z(squared) will get one of these guys if they are having a bad day. Or I will get one of them if we are having a bad day. I am kidding because no mater what they still have to go into work. God Bless you Boys!

The Cousin – A Bouie UES Brunch at Penrose with my girls!!!!!!
UWS Holly – Well it won’t be ‘go see Hamilton’ because her tickets are for May 30th. She will go to the 105th street dog run with the Ellington in the park outdoor café.
Maria – Bloody steak at Peter Lugar in Brooklyn
Gumata Jennie – Joining Maria for that Steak
Rhino – A great meal from Maria and Inga
LJZ – Stupid Expensive Cocktails on the roof of the Peninsula then sipping champagne at Tiffany’s with her personal shopper.
F from Z(squared) – Playing Dominos at the Ear Inn and drinks at Oceana.
JP on the Island of Long – Head to the Gym then Beach. I’ll be in a NY state of Mind.
Tay-Tay – Mani/Pedi, then a Swedish Massage and flying down to Florida ASAP for the Big 3-0!
Vivian Longstreet – Raoul’s – having a martini at the bar served by Franko then I’m having dinner in a booth. I will start with 6 raw oysters, then steak au Poivre and finally the profiteroles.

Asshole to Elbow getting a pic of Manhattanedge

Ty Middelton – Go to my Tailor and pick up the Rick Owens Suit I had altered. Then head over to Caviar Russe for Vodka and Caviar.
Ty Webb on The Price is Right – Response Pending
Name Withheld to protect the innocent – JG Mellon’s in the UES for a bloody Mary, Bowl of Chili and a Burger.
The Bartender – I am going to hug the F Train!
San Pedro Scoop – Murray’s Bagels for a Sesame with Lox or Maple Walnut Cream Cheese naturally Untoasted
Brizzyc – Wants to go to Kettle of Fish for a Packers Game! I miss being with FANS!
Grantmeaccess – Anything to do with Beer!
Mary Louise Geranium – Find a Gospel Brunch and ride the Q Train into the city to see her chiropractor.
Steve from Flushing – Aquaduct and then maybe Belmont.
The Bookie – I am going to go to one of my favorite Alphabet City Dive Bars, walk in the men’s room and if it doesn’t smell like it used to I am going to be pissed!
QBall from Tudor City – I am going to Old Town Tavern sit at the bar and bitch to John (the Bartender) about how the Mets completely fucking Suck!
Kate the Dog Sitter – I am going to my favorite restaurant Coppola’s with my grandma!
Constantine – “I am going to walk into Mt. Sinai hospital and I am going to hug every nurse, doctor and employee”
Mr. Clean – I am going to cherish the following 6 words – “Stand Clear Of The Closing Doors!”
DRS (Former Work Momma) – I plan on seeing my mother, and head to the beach.

Thanks to all those who played along. I had fun putting this out.

Second Installment for Tiger Nation Fans visiting New York/Brooklyn 2/2

So are you Tiger Nation fans getting excited yet? I have to say that the city does get a little bit of a special charge during the holidays. The Rockefeller tree will be covered in Scaffolding because they have to get it ready for the official lighting ceremony in early December. Not to worry there are tons of other stuff already up to get pictures taken for those Christmas Cards. G(Squared), I saw that they were putting lights on those chicken feet down in Chinatown. I did see a Miller Light Truck on Canal Street so you should be good to go.

Previously we spoke about some of the tips for you visitors, here are the second half of them. But this list will be fun stuff. So without further adeau;

Underground is the best way to get around the city – They deliver 1.5 million packages in the city of Manhattan a day. Add to that Yellow Taxis, Ubers, Tour Buses and the city gets a tad…..gridlocked. They once timed a car going from 1st Ave Crosstown to 12 Ave and it took almost 52 minutes. That being said using the subway is your best friend. Again use Google Maps. Those maps they have in the subway stations are good but do you know which lines are not running on the weekend? If you use Google Maps and The Pigeon App and you will have a ease free commute. I say get Metro Card and put 20.00 on it and then refill it when necessary.
Subway 101 Hints – Take off your backpack and go to the center of the cab if it is packed. Let the elderly and pregnant women sit down. If you see a subway car that is empty when others are packed it is empty for a reason. Trust me you can’t hold your breath between subway stops so don’t go there. Oh when you are leaving the subway area and see someone standing there sliding his hand like he has a credit card through his other hand do them a solid. Swipe them in the Subway on your card. Pay it forward.
Staying in an Air BnB? – Download the Fresh Direct App and have your beer, wine, bottled water, snacks and drunk munchies food delivered to your door. I say order your stuff the day before you arrive and you can schedule your delivery day and time. You will have to be there when the stuff is delivered but trust me schleping (that is Yiddish for carrying) groceries to your apartment sucks.
Speaking of Apps download the Seamless app. This is 24 hour room service for the area restaurants. It is New York’s version of Uber Eats and it kicks ass. Bagel delivery guys are the best. Make sure you tip them cash. Another App you need is the Pigeon app. It is Waze but for New York Subways and gives you real-time delays and issues.
Cost of Beers and Food – Now brace yourself you Max’s Sports Bar regulars the cost of beer isn’t going to be the same as in 38103. I don’t want to hear it, I have been here for 4 years and have accepted paying north of $5.00 for Bud Light and $8.50 for Titos and soda. Are there cheaper places? Sure there are but here is my suggestion. Sit at the bar, be nice, be respectful and maybe the bartender may give you a “Buy Back” where they give you a drink on the house. Also it wouldn’t be a bad idea to stash a couple C-notes in your wallet. A lot of Brooklyn bars are Cash Only. Those are pretty easy as you just leave your money on the counter and the bartender will take the funds needed for drinks out of your pot. Trust me, they aren’t going to screw you.
Bars and places to eat around The Barclays’ Center – plenty of great places on 5th Avenue to grab some food and drink before and after the game. In the interest of some of those establishments that I frequent on 5th Avenue I am not going to name them here. You are also just steps away from the Subway station and can get into Manhattan fairly quickly.
Sightseeing in the City – Want to see the Bitch in the Harbor? Jump on the Staten Island Ferry (it is free) and you will boat right by it to take a picture. The also sell beer on board (ANG MT just saw that and it peaked his interest) and you get to see that 5th borough that Mr. 3 First Names despises. When you are down in Fidi swing by the Stock Exchange, Bull, Fearless Girl, Hamilton’s grave. Then walk over to the footprints at the 9/11 memorial.
Food Places you have to have – First off there is no good Memphis BBQ here in New York. Don’t try it, you are wasting your time and money. I equate it to trying to find a NYC bagel in Memphis. It ain’t happening. Do your homework and try to eat a couple slices at the Best that NYC has to offer. Want to eat at Katz’s or one of the big named places – be first on line when they open. Swing by the south east corner of Avenue of Americas and W53th for some World Famous Halal Guys. Go easy on the White Sauce and get extra napkins. Again – Get Reservations NOW!
Food Suggestions – People always ask me this and believe it or not I am just as unfamiliar with places as you are. I have heard you can eat Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner at a different place for each meal for a year and not have a repeat. My normal saying is that if it is still in business then they must be doing something right. The margin of error for restaurants is so very tight and if you have a bad showing you are done. I also use Zagats, Yelp and Google Searches for the best places. If you want a Dive Bar list let me know. I have a killer one!
Clothing and Shoes – I get it, you ladies want to look good in your wedges and or heels but who are you kidding. It is going to be cold and possibly will rain. Comfort is your key and make sure that you have good shoes because you will be walking a ton! Regarding the George Costanza Puffy Coat, you can bring it but with going in and out of places, the subway you may want to layer and wear a scarf. If you plan on going to the Parade bring everything but your kitchen sink. Also the winds up here can be a bitch. My wool top coat is great about half of the time but if we are to have snow or a light rain I am breaking out my North Face coat. Bring a hat too!
Shopping – I use Amazon and order eCommerce so you are on your own. I do recommend that you check out Century 21 downtown. They have some good stuff.

Pro Tip – Use the Name or Number don’t call it “Taking the Red Line” #RoboCares

The Pigeon App – As sure as I-240 gets backed up so do the Subways. Get this app and check it before you journey out for the day.

Think of this as Room Service for your hotel/Air BnB. Be Careful though, you can run up a pretty large tab with those drunk munchies!

Fresh Direct App – Trust Me lugging those cases of beer or bottled water sucks. And they can deliver wine and drunk food too! Make sure you order and reserve your day/time because it will get busy before Thanksgiving.

So Good but make sure you get extra napkins because your elbow may get juicy!

They don’t call it the Bible for nothing!

Enjoy your time in New York and Brooklyn, be nice to people, support local, tip your bartenders and stay safe. We leave out on Turkey Day for the weekend but give me a shout if you are in town early.

The 2019 Carl Lipbalm Memorial Caddy Scholarship Winner 1 of 2 – ZF

Do you recall 3 summers ago we hosted The 2016 Caddy Scholarship Winner Special Ed? What about last summer when it was the 2018’s Caddy Scholarship Winner Love Bug? By the way, the 2017 Caddy Scholarship winner elected to forgo her trip to NYC and took the cash equivalent. What that means is that her parents are free to use our condo when we are away as long as they keep the dog alive. So this spring we had 2 High School graduates which can cause a logistical issue considering we only have room for 1 stinky body at a time. Thankfully we told both sets of parents (who happen to be sisters) that it would be first come first served for dates that can fit our schedule. ZF selected this past weekend which unbeknownst to him would also happen to be the hottest weekend.

No need to cry over spilled Gold Bond! Come on and we will adjust the schedule to accommodate time to reapply powder to prevent Swamp Ass. ZF arrived Thursday evening and thankfully Geranium was able to collect him at the airport and bring him in via New York Subway.

Friday Morning I took young ZF with me as I was going to show him around town, make some calls for work and then hand him off to Geranium in the afternoon. We were like Tourist Ninja’s on Friday Morning and hit the following;

Wall Street and NYSE
Federal Hall
The Charging Bull on Broadway (I fucked up and forgot they moved Fearless Girl to the NYSE and it was too hot to go back)
Staten Island Ferry and a Trip to see the Bitch in the Harbor (FYI – Friday AM is the best time to do this)
9/11 Footprints
10 Ladder/10 Engine
Alexander Hamilton’s Grave at Trinity (The CBT Surprise)
Times Square (kill me BTW)
Cobert Studio
Fancy Lunch at a Midtown East Sushi House
Rockefeller Center
Fallon’s Marquee
Joe’s Pizza
St. Patrick Cathedral
UES trip to see some of CBT’s customers
Grand Central Station

So after that we came home because well let’s be honest. I was dripping wet and even though he wouldn’t admit it, he was miserable too. Thankfully we knocked off a lot on that trip. That evening Geranium took ZF to see “House of Mormon” and I went to get a cigar.

Saturday we changed it up and because it was miserable hot we did the Bus tour called “The Ride.” It was neat but unfortunately the AC in the bus couldn’t keep up but nevertheless we had a good time. That evening we went to see Blue Man Group which we have never seen. It was good and we enjoyed the AC.

Sunday we took it easy and took ZF over to Coney island for a Nathan’s Hot Dog and to see the boardwalk. We didn’t last long and ended up back at the apartment to suck in some AC.

As always, it was a great time to spend time with someone you normally don’t spend time with at Holiday events and it is always fun to see someone experience New York City for the first time. Sure its a pain in the ass in Times Square during the heat but that is what makes this city so much fun. The guys who emcee The Ride were taken back when we told them we were from Brooklyn. Then they figured it out when we said ZF was from Little Rock Arkansas. On to the pictures..

What do you mean I have to pose for pictures. Nobody told me this in my orientation.

Shut up kid and smile with the Bitch in the harbor!

I am guessing I am getting Thumbs up because Grand Central is Air Conditioned!

Or maybe ZF prefers Stephen Colbert in the UWS

Cousin Trumpet you are taking this picture because the girl in the blue jean shorts aren’t you?

Missed this by 30 minutes on Friday heading into the city.

Disclaimer – They have performances pre set along the route.

I mean they are killing it and it was probably 100 degrees in Columbus Circle on Saturday.

But what is fun is that this is New York and the Tourist on the Bus don’t see it yet.

Thanks guy bathing in the Fountain. Only in New York!

We were in Orchestra, down below is called “Poncho” for obvious reasons

Please, last pic, I am dying in this heat!

It was fun but it was hot and thankfully ZF was a good sport. We had fun playing with you.

Don’t Rock The Boat – Losers Lounge takes to the Hudson

You have heard about our many visits to Joe’s Pub to see The Losers Lounge. During the summer the Losers traditionally take a break and don’t perform but kick back up in the fall months. The next show is next month but there was a special performance that Vivian and Stone had purchased tickets and suggested that we attend. The show was a Disco Themed and it was on the Circle Line boat.

Joe and the Losers didn’t disappoint at all! Playing all the hits and with the backdrop of Manhattan you get the picture. It was cool as crap!

Fun Times with the Gang!

Still never gets old looking at this view

But First Let’s take a Selfie!

Of Course they had Karaoke Set up!

Aunt Terry I can’t believe you didn’t even acknowledge us!

Brooklyn Bridge Shot

Connie and Katia

Great show and lots of fun!

Nice “Action Shot” of the Empire State Building from the West Side

Thanks to Vivian and Stone for suggesting we do this. It was lots of fun

Emma Stone, Billy Jean King, and Paul McCartney walk into a bar.

Actually they walk into Alan Cumming’s bar, Club Cummings. This is a true story according to the bar owner who we went to see on Saturday night with Maria and Bill. His show “Legal Alien” is a mash up of songs, funny stories but he only down side of the show was that it was at friggin midnight! Seriously don’t you entertainers realize that we us old folks have to be in bed by then? Anyway Alan Cumming is a riot and gave us his outtake on certain issues that the crowd all agreed upon.

Joe’s Pub sure is proud of its Vodka.