Month: November 2009

That Turkey was "Call Central America Good!"

If you have ever fought crime with me you know that I have a unique list of sayings when describing something. I mean a corn dish that I tried this past summer wasn’t just good it was “Slap yo Momma Good!” My super hero TonyB has a list that are even better than mine such as my favorite “It is walk across a street filled with broken glass barefoot to go eat there!” when he was talking about a popular Chicago hot dog joint. Well we can now add another one to the CBT arsenal as if something is ‘that’ good and you tried a virgin recipe on a major holiday un-tested it is “You called Central America on the phone to thank them for the recipe!”
I will post the recipe at the bottom and trust me it is “that easy” as Cindy told it to me last Turkey day when I was cooking the chickens for the “BBQ Sauce off” down in Belize. By the way hey Ruthie who won that contest again?

The Nephew was helping me with the list and looked at me like I was drinking my “Cold Pops” already when he asked me about the first item on the list

Come on Uncle CBT, A T-shirt Turkey?

I know that it isn’t Bacon but there is nothing sexier than 2 pounds of butter about to get melted is there?

And for those who ate at the CBT no it wasn’t the shirt that I wore when I did my 5 mile morning run.

Honey Lipitor is on the phone for you

Sadly I didn’t take any “During” pictures but this is the bird resting and that is 4 pounds of butter in the bottom of that roasting pan!

Ba carving up that beast!

THE RECIPE FROM CINDY

Yes….it was me!

Take a white t-shirt and cut a big enough piece to fit over the entire top of the turkey. Melt four gallons (ok maybe not) of butter and dip the t-shirt into the butter. Place it on top of the turkey. (you can put a stalk of celery, an orange, or stuffing inside the turkey if you want)

Baste the t-shirt every 1/2 hour with some of your four gallons of butter. take the t-shirt off the last half hour to brown the top.

enjoy!

Renita and Cindy
CHANGES IN LATITUDES B&B
San Pedro Town, Ambergris Caye Belize, CA
In Belize 501-226-2986 US and Canada 1-800-631-9834
latitudesbelize@yahoo.com http://www.ambergriscaye.com/latitudes
http://www.latitudesbelize.blogspot.com

— On Mon, 11/23/09, CBT wrote:

From: CBT

Subject: Turkey recipe
To: “Cindy and Renita”
Date: Monday, November 23, 2009, 4:36 PM

Didn’t you tell me about cooking the Turkey with a T-shirt? If so can you tell me again as I have forgotten and if not no I have not stated drinking (yet)!

TTK!

An open letter to the Belizean Tourism, Hotel Association, Chamber of Commerce and anyone else who will listen

Belizean Tourism Industry Association
Belize Hotel Association
San Pedro Branch of Belize Hotel Association
Belize Chamber of Commerce and Industry
Civil Aviation
Belize Airport Concession Company
Johnny Grief – Tropic Air
Betty Longsworth – Travel Belize
Steve Schulte – Tropic Air

To whom it may concern;

Over the past 3 years I have noticed a steady increase in the cost of airfare from the US to Belize and would like to bring this to your attention and possibly raise some awareness. I am sure you are fully aware that with the sagging US economy a lot of financial belts are being tightened and travel decisions are being effected by this. I bring this up because my wife and I attempt to travel to Belize 3 times a year to visit friends, family and enjoy all that the country has to offer. Currently the cost of a round trip ticket in February from MEM to BZE is $800.00 and I ask why I can fly significantly cheaper to other Central America destinations (SJO, STT, CUN, CZM, SAP) using the same date range? One destination beat the price by 38% and as much as I love visiting the country of Belize one has to wonder why La Isla Bonita is so expensive?

Sincerely,

CBT

One has to hope that someone will get the picture….

TTK!

I hate living downtown, why can’t I live in Bordova?

Wonder if I can get that thing into my checked luggage to sell in Central Park on San Pedro? I bet I could find a couple people to help me….

Sweet little set up they have LP burners on the rig (left of pic) so you can get the charcoal going pretty quick!

About as big as a small car!

Wonder why they have to put a tire boot on it? I hear downtown is safe *not from BBQ junkies*!

Good thing that Calhoun’s has easy bake ovens for a kitchen or Max may take offense!

TTK!

The Bar turned 10 and man do I miss Louie!

Bar 595 turned 10 last weekend and to mark the occasion we did some cleaning and re-organization of the crap. First thing was to clean all of the glassware, Polish the silver wine buckets (going high class now) wash the votive candle holders and other stuff that we have amassed over the many years. On a side note we did find a Bob Marley sleef that was in a ziplock but we aren’t the smoking kind so we threw it away 😦 Maybe the trash guy will have a better day if he finds it!
Anyway as I was cleaning I happened across a pair of champagne flutes from another bar that had a 10 year anniversary from back in the day named Sleep Out Louies. I am going to date myself here as downtown has a ton more residents than it did in the early 90’s but Man did we have some fun at Sleep Outs! From the Blue Beats on Friday night to Susan P making bloody mary’s that would raise the dead to Sean delivering “water” to a now deceased attorney THOSE were the days! From Pookie the dancing chef to Carol R asking us if we wanted Pubic hair in our beer to even the hundred dollar liars poker games…Ok I will stop now! Anyway Louie is gone and we have a steak house in it’s place, I know that there are those who still curse the owner for rebranding it but times are different. Anyway let me hoist a glass in Louie’s name still home of the one hole men’s restroom!

That is just the wine glasses

Has it been that long?

Still have our ties from the bar Mine is the far left and Mrs CBT’s is on the far right.

Good thing I married her or we would have to have joint custody of them!

Shiney purty wine buckets!

For those who recognize the green bar mat I did not steal that!

Got to fire up a cold one for this post!

TTK!

The Bar turned 10 and man do I miss Louie!

That is just the wine glasses

Has it been that long?

Still have our ties from the bar Mine is the far left and Mrs CBT’s is on the far right.

Good thing I married her or we would have to have joint custody of them!

Shiney purty wine buckets!

For those who recognize the green bar mat I did not steal that!

Got to fire up a cold one for this post!

TTK!

Sporting news – Dateline Memphis, TN!

Again breaking from my normal dribble but this is too good not to pass up for my three readers. First of all I hope the film crew that stayed in Memphis reporting the firing of Tommy West and this whole Allen Iverson debacle had a good time, ate a bunch of ribs and saw Graceland. We had great weather this past week and hope you will be back when we have good news to report about.

If you want my opinion here is a quick Carbunkle Trumpet cure to both of the problems that are plaguing our sports teams So first the University of Memphis Football Program and how to cure it;

RC love the hair but you gots go, thanks for the memories but even the airport isn’t going to save your arse this time.
I loved the comments on how great the U of M facilities are but when you drive down Poplar avenue and see that PDS (that’s a grade school folks) has a sports turf football field and those football players hadn’t even gotten acne yet COME ON! RC you want to see some great facilities then head over to Texas and see some High Schools while you are getting your cowboy hat because a new roof and some paint won’t cut it here.
Again I love the hair but Tommy West made a great point when he was blasting you, either commit to the program or do away with it. There were more people watching the MUS/Brentwood Academy game this past Friday night than when the U of M played ECU.

Ok that was easy now onto the Grizzlies and you are going to love this one;

So the Memphis Grizzlies hire (that’s right he was hired) Allen Iverson to work for the Memphis Grizzlies in exchange for a salary he is given a uniform, meals, lodging and God knows what else we are paying him for. Now when A.I. showed up on his first day of work he wasn’t prepared so could not play with the big kids and ended up having to stay inside cleaning the erasers while the rest of the class went out and played. 2 weeks ago he was finally able to punch in and work for the Grizzlies when they were in Sacramento on a business trip and what did he do, he complained about not getting enough work time like the others. (you see where I am going with this don’t you?) Now A. I. asked the boss if he could take some vacation time and I guess he is enjoying his time away from work but how is the company doing in his absence, that’s right the Griz are not doing well and production is way behind. Here is my suggestion on that and get ready for it;

I equate this whole A.I. thing to my current job as a factory worker for the rubber sex toy factory as I have been given a uniform, a nice workstation, have a fan to cool me in the summer and they heat the building in the winter.
My boss expects me to show up each day at the appointed time, work hard, smart and safely till each break and treat other rubber sex toy factory team members with dignity and respect and if I have a problem then speak with my supervisor and not gossip.
In return for my work I am given a pay check but I am required to ‘push’ out a certain number of ‘units’ each week as that has been set forth by the bosses. If I don’t well let me just say that their will be hell to pay but if I do go over then I am given a bonus and I am in the running for “Rubber Sex Toy Maker of the Month!”
If the Rubber Sex Toy Factory at the end of the day does not have any injuries, we achieve our bonus and reduce waste then we are all given a gold star and when we get enough gold stars then the entire company gets a bonus and a free lunch by the Owner. As you can tell everyone wants to work together and achieve those goal so we need every team member on their game.

Here is what I say that they offer A.I;

Promise A.I. a certain number of ‘working’ minutes each week and he is free to take as many breaks as he needs but we will still require him to produce a certain number of ‘units’.
In return for his paycheck we will evaluate his performance for 20 working days and if he achieves the goals set forth by the company then we will allow him to continue his employment with the Grizzlies.
Should he not achieve the goals set forth then he is docked pay, reduced hours and possible termination.

And you think that all I do is just wear funny hats and make fun of people?

Love that hair R.C. good luck being the AD at some pigs knuckle grade school

Here is the Grizzlies Company Supervisor Lionel Hollins (or A.I.’s babysitter)

According to his Tweets, he loves Memphis and wants to help us!

TTK!

Where is my Funny hat, I may need to drink this afternoon!

Sporting news – Dateline Memphis, TN!

If you want my opinion here is a quick Carbunkle Trumpet cure to both of the problems that are plaguing our sports teams So first the University of Memphis Football Program and how to cure it;

RC love the hair but you gots go, thanks for the memories but even the airport isn’t going to save your arse this time.
I loved the comments on how great the U of M facilities are but when you drive down Poplar avenue and see that PDS (that’s a grade school folks) has a sports turf football field and those football players hadn’t even gotten acne yet COME ON! RC you want to see some great facilities then head over to Texas and see some High Schools while you are getting your cowboy hat because a new roof and some paint won’t cut it here.
Again I love the hair but Tommy West made a great point when he was blasting you, either commit to the program or do away with it. There were more people watching the MUS/Brentwood Academy game this past Friday night than when the U of M played ECU.

Ok that was easy now onto the Grizzlies and you are going to love this one;

I equate this whole A.I. thing to my current job as a factory worker for the rubber sex toy factory as I have been given a uniform, a nice workstation, have a fan to cool me in the summer and they heat the building in the winter.
My boss expects me to show up each day at the appointed time, work hard, smart and safely till each break and treat other rubber sex toy factory team members with dignity and respect and if I have a problem then speak with my supervisor and not gossip.
In return for my work I am given a pay check but I am required to ‘push’ out a certain number of ‘units’ each week as that has been set forth by the bosses. If I don’t well let me just say that their will be hell to pay but if I do go over then I am given a bonus and I am in the running for “Rubber Sex Toy Maker of the Month!”
If the Rubber Sex Toy Factory at the end of the day does not have any injuries, we achieve our bonus and reduce waste then we are all given a gold star and when we get enough gold stars then the entire company gets a bonus and a free lunch by the Owner. As you can tell everyone wants to work together and achieve those goal so we need every team member on their game.

Here is what I say that they offer A.I;

Promise A.I. a certain number of ‘working’ minutes each week and he is free to take as many breaks as he needs but we will still require him to produce a certain number of ‘units’.
In return for his paycheck we will evaluate his performance for 20 working days and if he achieves the goals set forth by the company then we will allow him to continue his employment with the Grizzlies.
Should he not achieve the goals set forth then he is docked pay, reduced hours and possible termination.

And you think that all I do is just wear funny hats and make fun of people?

Love that hair R.C. good luck being the AD at some pigs knuckle grade school

Here is the Grizzlies Company Supervisor Lionel Hollins (or A.I.’s babysitter)

According to his Tweets, he loves Memphis and wants to help us!

TTK!

Where is my Funny hat, I may need to drink this afternoon!

People Need to lighten the Eff up!

When I started this worthless dribble I have always tried to avoid the 5 CBT No-No topics (Religion, Abortion, Gun Control, Gay Marriage & Current Events) as no one cares about my stance on them and it is like wrestling with a pig in that you both get dirty and the pig likes it. Anyway as of late I am really having trouble with the last item as it seems every time I log onto my twitter account, or get a ‘breaking NEWS’ email it is always bad news and it can get to you. I mean if it wasn’t for my ‘Special’ Iced tea that I drink at lunch or the occasional hit of blow off of the ample bosom of the stripper who is sitting on my lap a lunch (can you tell I watched Californication last night?) I may go Postal!

Anyway I am going to get on my soap box and do a little preaching today and say that I think that everyone needs to ease up a little and give a hug to a perfect stranger today. After you get rid of the burning sensation from your eyes, or your voice goes back to your normal baritone range because of the shot to your junk please remember to have a nice day!

My neighbor must have been conceived in a trailer park, look at her now and that thing behind her is her porch!

What in the Corn Bread Freck is going on here!

These guys are holding on way too tight!

I will get on my soapbox if I have to! Don’t make me!

Deep down I have always idolized Elton John and I am not afraid to admit it!

Leave it Terry!

Right now there is a Hancock Fabric store reordering silver tool!

People (who don’t reside in 38103) asked us what is going on and told them.

It is Sunday!

See if you can pick out what is not right!

Daniel Boone was a man (wait are those chick glasses?)

Memphis really needs to address the panhandling problem we have here

Don’t judge him because he is on welfare and can’t afford a proper hat, we accept all kinds!

She is so ashamed of what is going on in the world she can’t even look up!

The Saints are still undefeated – Is that Pig Flying?

I really need to take a vacation to Venezuela you know!

You can take the boy out of the country but you can’t take the country out of the boy!

Again with the Panhandlers!

Well at least the panhandlers downtown dress better than the Midtown ones!

Have a good day and please take it light!

TTK!

Am I really scared of ghosts?

So with Momma’s new position as head washroom attendant she and I will not be able to visit that crappy island in November and defend my title as ~~head bullshitter~~ BBQ Sauce off Champ. (I think I can hear the grumbling from MN and Belize as well KC right now) So rather than sit on our hands and do nothing we decided to revisit the cruise lines as we were frequent abusers of them back in the day (hell we got married on one)! We (Me, Momma and NYC Momma) decided upon Norwegian’s ship the Pearl sailing out of Miami in early December. Now this trip is kind of neat in that 2 of our ports (Dominican and St. Thomas) we have good friends who live there and are going to catch up with them and party ‘local style’ as I do like a good Carlos and Charlies but I love local dive bars.
When we booked we got a good deal and sure enough Norwegian wants to fill the boat so they dropped the price after we paid up to get some more passengers.
Naturally we inquired if we could get some on board credit for our ~~beer~~ diet coke tabs but they didn’t want to lose that revenue so they upgraded us to Demi Suites to which we were ecstatic.

Well Momma did a little Google search to see if she could find some pics of the room or cabin style and she googled our room number (11122) and we find this….Missing Woman Photo

Anybody know the rules on carrying Garlic, holy Water, or a couple thousand crucifixes on board a ship?

If we make it to St. Thomas, we get to see Doty!

And if we make it to the Dominican we will see Ceres!

Oh and it looks like I get to create a new post label for this entry!

TTK! and pass the Valium!

Bucket List (and I stole every one of these pics too)

A couple of days back I posted on my FB status update to pick what one thing that was true and it read like this;

Imagine that it is raining in Memphis on a Friday
I was fixing to board the plane for San Pedro to bring Laurie and Lara stripper wigs and a birthday present for Mary G.
After I drank my weight in beer I was going to head up to Playa del Carmen and celebrate Dia de los Muertos as I do realize that I probably am going to that ‘warm’ place but you have to get a little religion when you can.
that I just had my C.B. & S. waxed for my brand new sequined thong.
Or some bad comment about banging an octogenarian like a screen door in a wind storm.

Well actually other than the first and the last those in the middle are true. The hotel that we always stay in Belize has a Halloween party that is off the chart and from the pics that I stole off of FB it looks like the rain didn’t spoil any fun. One of these days!

Good to see that TG got her wig in time, she was cutting it close according to her texts

Hey Maya did you know that it was Mary G’s birthday? Look at the 21 year old, isn’t she cute!

I can’t bring myself to post the picture that is making this guy wear that outfit but I will just say that I am NUTS over Sir Peter! And I pissed myself when I saw the picture too!