CT Rambling

Moving to The Big Apple…. another perspective

Seems like I have been speaking to a bunch of our Double Decker Tour Bus Sales reps from other markets. Naturally these folks are a “tad” younger than I am but because I am here in the middle of Times Square I guess they think I have found the answers. I am also a ‘big brother’ to one of our up and comer Tour Bus selling reps and she just moved to Manhattan. Seriously, she has been her almost a month and thankfully hasn’t gotten squashed by that cross town bus either.

Honestly, how do you explain the New York Experience until you are in the middle of it? How does one properly describe the wonderful aroma from the 2/3 train tracks in Times Square station and not tell the tourists they are smelling pee/poop? I still to this day don’t know how to explain The Coney Island Mermaid Festival and I have been 3 fucking years in a row!!!

To put this in a Memphis perspective – how do you explain the Wine Race to someone from New York. What about Festival Season? Better yet try to explain Prince Mongo or Memphis politics.

To put this in a Belizean Perspective – how do you explain Halloween or Lobsterfest to someone who has never visited? Care to tell someone how bad Middle Street was during rainy season when it wasn’t paved. How about the road north when there was the hand drawn barge? Let’s not forget when Reaper would fill the skies with parachutes each spring.

You get my drift? You feel me? This shit ain’t easy!

So here are my David Letterman Top 10 “Things to Consider when choosing to move to New York” *disclaimer – please seek other council as well. I have been known to be full of shit.

  1. Location from your residence to a Subway Platform is Paramount. What does that mean to you? When we lived at 71St and First Avenue the closest subway before they opened the 2nd Avenue Subway was at 68th & Lex which was .5 Miles away. To put that in a Memphis scale. Walk from the South Bluffs Apartments to Max’s Sports Bar which is also .5 Miles away. Oh and that is just one way. Do that twice a day in rain, snow, cold as wind and Hot ass weather. You feel me. And get ready for delays and weekend service interruptions. We live in Downtown Brooklyn so I can pick from 16 different lines and walk 75 feet to get to the first one. Geranium wants to move in May 2020. Of course she doesn’t use public transportation. I do. We will move from 333 but I have serious argument to move from this area.
  2. How much to you want to Pay to Play? Apartment on First Avenue ran us $2750.00 and that was with a “discount” but it was a full service building (take out packages, mail, laundry, let the dog walker in) and provided a security that all guests had to be announced. (Well except for Maria) Oh and that was for 535 Square Feet too. We pay comparable to that and are 2 subway stops from Manhattan. You want to have a nice house with a yard, you will spend at least an hour+ on a train or bus on your commute into the city. I know folks who travel 2+ hours one way into the city. They do it 5 days a week. Think about this…..
  3. Do you really need all that shit? We moved up here in a UHaul with clothes, kitchen stuff, art and a blow up bed. Oh and the poodles too. We bought at Ikea and made it work. Do you really need 3 couches? Oh by the way when we moved from UES to Brooklyn we threw away a lot of shit. I look around this place now and before we move again there will be a yard sale.
  4. Think you can eat/drink out on the town every night like they did in Seinfeld and Sex and the City? Trust me, when I return to Memphis I always accuse the bartender of not charging me enough. It costs a lot to eat out and have cocktails here. If you don’t know how to cook………Fucking Learn! Do you recall my Bourdain Post? Learn how make an omelet. This way you can cook a hot meal for your ‘last nights conquest’ the next morning. You may even get bonus points because you both slept on a futon that you don’t have the heart to tell them you found on the street last week.
  5. You will eventually either curse or be cursed out so get ready for it. I look back and yes I deserved to get a “GFY” for when I tried to quick walk around a lady in a walker on a crowded street. No I didn’t knock her down but I made her hesitate. And a 75 Year Old Grandmother told me to Go Fuck Myself. Still can’t get over that.
  6. You are going to see/experience/smell/hear something that you may not agree with. How are you going to react? This isn’t up for discussion.
  7. Want to learn a different a culture or religion? Just ask. I live down the block from The Sri Sri Radha Govinda Mandir Hare Krishna Center. You read that right this is a place for Hare Krishnas to assemble. Yes, the same ones from the move “Airplane” who sold the flowers in the airport. They wear the robes, have the bald heads and are as friendly as ever and I am so glad they are near by. Same thing goes for different cultures. I love getting into a cab/uber and ask my driver where they are from and then ask; “Tell me about your country?” This is the equivalent as asking someone at BBQ Fest what makes your ribs/shoulder better than everyone else? Or ask them about their college football team. Seriously, lots of Pride and I love it. Now, If you think that everyone should be American, look the same and don’t accept that then maybe you want to stay home.
  8. Don’t get Freaked Out When You see a Celebrity – All I had to do was text GrainbinGirl and my text read “I saw her, I saw him, they were tiny and didn’t cry like a little girl”. She knew that I saw Ina Garten and Jeffrey. I still laugh that my former Momma damn near knocked down Pierce Brosnan on Madison Avenue when we were walking down the street. I ‘casually’ said to him “Sorry Mr. Crown” and she didn’t believe it. So we had to hoof it down Madison Avenue for her to see for herself.
  9. What do you think about the Weather and the Homeless/Bums? It gets bad here. Winters Suck, Nor’easters suck, and the rain blows to no end. Regarding the Homeless – I will say that Geranium has ridden the subways many a night solo and never felt threatened. The people looking for money can be annoying here but you have to know how to respond to them. I still love the guy who was in front of Grey’s Papaya on 86th and was begging for food because he was hungry. A guy asked him what he wanted from the menu and he declared that he didn’t like Hot Dogs & just wanted money (Failed to mention that Grey’s Papas was the hot dog nirvana) so the man fired back. “Then don’t fucking ask for money in front of a hot dog place, maybe go to a burger place or GFY” The bums do make a lot of money up here. Just be cautious.
  10. Last Rule – Find “A Guy”. We have lived here for four years, we love it here. We have a great support system here, we are so thankful for this. And that system also knows that they can call on us. When you get home on a Friday night and are exhausted from the work week there is nothing better meeting up with friends and having a beer. We all work hard, might as well enjoy the fruits of our labor.
Our First Apartment in the UES. We look back and that was a lot of room and it was laid out perfectly for us.
Ah the Snow Storm that dumped 37 inches in the city.
What I am standing in isn’t snow that has been plowed. That is just normal snow. Hence why I am not planning on vacationing to go skiing.
Learn the Subway or You will run out of money.
Oh and you better have lots of Cash too. Lot of the places are cash only.

Have a good Day.

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Pictures of The Week

Had a great week. That was until Geranium decided to shame my ass on having a slight salt addition. This weekend will be brief as she has to leave on Sunday for Seattle. However next Saturday we are going to the Red Neck Rivera.

YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH WHEN TALKING ABOUT MY SALT COLLECTION! (Thankfully she doesn’t read this worthless dribble) In all seriousness I laughed my ass off. So I buy salt. At least I don’t buy cigars…..er oh well.
The Dog hid after that spirited arguement
Speaking of Cigars
The heat wasn’t like it was in the South but the Humidity was high AF!
Played some Dominoes last weekend.

By the way did you go buy Rebecca Coutant’s book yet?

Have a good weekend, if it is nice today we may be in the UES atop the Met Museum.

Carbunkle is on his soapbox again

Now I have to come clean with you 15 readers. I really enjoyed my trips over to Spain and Switzerland to see Mrs. Trumpet. But what I am about to tell you may shock some of you. I really enjoyed being somewhere that has their shit together when it comes to the environment. Relax, I am not going to be chaining myself up to any trees or will get involved in the ongoing debate about Tom Lee Park in Memphis. I am referring to the way that in both Spain and Switzerland they have their shit together with recycling and the banning of plastic and Styrofoam.

Case in point – my corner deli and frequent breakfast haunt. While I was living the bachelor life I would head down there and get me some eggs, bacon and sausage. I would get a single use Styrofoam to-go container, take the container to be weighed and would have to almost yell at the cashiers; “I don’t need it in a bag or any utensils” and they would look at me like I told them I wanted to sleep with their sister. All I was doing was walking upstairs to eat it at the apartment and I have all that shit here. Why do I need to create more waste if I don’t need to? 

If I got a San Pellegrino, they would be trying to put that in a plastic bag and also throwing in napkins and a straw too! I can’t fault them, they are ingrained that everyone wants a bag and everyone needs a knife, fork, spoon combo kit. Seriously, how many of your offices have that drawer with all the ketchup, utensils, soy sauce and millions of napkins. The worst are the food delivery guys. You are delivering to a residence, I bet if you had an option to not get all that crap with the order maybe they would knock 50 cents off the order. Whole Foods does that if you BYOB.

When in Switzerland on Saturday morning I ventured out to get hydration supplies. Traveling 10 hours and then drinking enough booze to sedate a small city does tend to make one thirsty. I walked out onto the plaza and found the Coop supermarket. 3 big 1.5 L of water, 2 Coke Lights and I was ready to go. I get to the cashier and she looks at me asking if I had a bag. With my limited French and her lack of English she informed me that they don’t have bags and I have to bring my own. Try carrying 5 big bottles with a Class 3 Hangover two blocks and not drop anything. Was I kinda steamed? Yep. Why don’t you carry bags Coop Supermarket? Oh, wait why is the Ugly American bitching? Shut the Fuck Up Carbunkle Trumpet and do better.

When they announced the ban on bags here in New York you should have heard the people bitching. “What do you mean I have to pay for a bag? This is an outrage!” Personally, I think that we should all adopt the Aldi Supermarket model. Use a quarter to rent a cart and you bring your own bags or buggies. Think about it, for all of you bitching about the Kroger on Union Avenue how nice would it be with no carts being left in the parking lot? Sure, the number of bums waiting to take your cart would be epic but that solves a lot of problems there. The plastic bag issue….I now carry a couple of the plastic shopping bags that can be balled up into the size of a pack of golf balls. This also limits me on picking up all the big stuff and I am making the environment better. Now I can feel no remorse when I am clubbing the hell out of that baby seal!

Ok, I am nearing 650 words and I know that some of you are losing interest.

Do you know how many of these are flying around the city a given day?
Our Bags for Shopping when we head out the door
I have one of these in my briefcase for when I pick up stuff before heading home
My Old Lady Cart
Seriously, how great is this idea?

But seriously folks can’t we all do better?

A Trip to Pig Beach

Considering that I have not had any pulled pork or ribs in a while Geranium and I while we were in the Gowanus part of Brooklyn decided that we should visit Pig Beach. A lot of my BBQ buddies have been showing up there doing celebrity cooks for either charity or other events. It seems that every time PegLeg would come in town I was out of town but I still wanted to see what this was all about. We arrived to the converted warehouse and didn’t really know what to expect.

The place is really cool and was also packed to the gills. They have a very nice outdoor area with picnic tables and the inside is also very nice with TV’s and a industrial feel. The service is much like Central BBQ where you place you order at the counter and then go find a spot to wait for your food to be ready. We sat at the bar and had a couple of Miller Lights and Gin Tonics. We split the Pulled Pork Sandwich, BBQ Baked Beans and Mac & Cheese. The red cabbage slaw on the sandwich was interesting but sadly the Mac & Cheese needed some seasoning. They have 3 types of BBQ Sauce and we preferred the mustard sauce over the other two. Just make sure you bring your wallet. They aren’t cheap on price of the drinks or food. I am sorry but a full rack of ribs shouldn’t cost you $34.00. Make a living, not a killing.

Outside was packed on a Sunday…Till the rain happened.
The place has a nice feel to it. Lots of families with kids and 4 legged ones too!
I recognize that trophy!
Not too bad
This actually was pretty good
A little too sweet for my taste
The Menu
Wonder who lives in that big tall ass building
Everything is disposables so busing tables is quick for a fast turn

Next time we will bring the Monkey Head

Living in New York – Shit we take for Granted

Back when we had Love Bug visiting us you take things for granted living up here. Naturally seeing the expressions on someone who has never visited New York affirms our decision to move up here. The other day I was talking to someone and I was telling them that I use Jet.com to get my household supplies rather than shopping for them. They asked me why I don’t just swing by Target or the store and get my Toilet Paper. I told them that I didn’t like carrying that stuff 5 blocks. I could immediately sense that the hamster wheel was spinning but the hamster was dead.

When Love Bug was here I made note of a couple things and jotted them down. A couple days later I was looking on Instagram and I noticed former Memphian @Brizzyc post a pic of her husband making wine. The making of the wine didn’t really seem that odd to me but the fact that this was being done in the bathroom did. Her husband was sitting on the “closed” toilet seat using a drill to stir the contents but in the background was a chest freezer. You see folks, space up here is at a premium. The simple fact that they have a freezer in their shitter tells me that the probably have some other unique storage that we probably do also.

  • Closet Space is a such a premium that you don’t expect for your luggage to be empty. Normally it is full of out of season clothes.
  • Yes we spend north $4.75 of a square foot to have the opportunity to live in New York/New Jersey. Oh and you can kiss your ass if you think you can get a garbage disposal or non-hotel style air conditioner.
  • Why lug your groceries/dry cleaning/booze/laundry detergent when you can have someone deliver it for you? I can recall when Theo’s momma was all happy when she could get her booze delivered to her back in Memphis. God bless Astor’s Wine & Spirits for delivering Mary Louise’s “maintenance” wine for 3 years now.
  • The last time I have driven in Manhattan was on August 5, 2015 and that was to empty the UHall truck and then promptly dropped off said truck in Long Island City. Nope I don’t miss it at all! I take cabs and Ubers when I want to ‘spoil’ myself or are too drunk for the subway.
  • Regarding Subways and Mass Transit – Avoid the empty subway car at all costs. Also it is best to let sleeping people lie. It isn’t your fault if the person sleeping off their night of cheap drinks has been to Coney Island and E96th Street 5 times. That is on them.
  • Do not text and walk on the New York city Streets – DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME KATIE/LIL GENERAL? This takes some self discipline because even Love Bug was struggling with this when she was taking pictures. Seriously you will run into something/someone and may get yelled at.
  • Street Meat is very good and is encouraged to eat at all times – Man I miss Anthony Bourdain! His show on Queens and the food culture is recorded on Tivo and I am planning on making a trip one of these days when GrainBin Girl comes up here. When I took Love Bug to the Hallal boys she couldn’t believe that such good food came from a food cart.
  • When they say it is going to rain and “be a washout” or my next favorite word “Nor’easter” do yourself a favor and try to stay home. Those two words can strike fear into many a New Yorker. It sucks and having to walk around in that shit really sucks.
  • Whenever you can – stop and take a look at the view.
  • Upside to living in a city that has 3 large airports – Taking a Non-Direct flight is for suckers!
  • The cost of a glass of wine can run about $14.00 and a Budlight can run north of $6.00. You do a lot of home drinking/Subway Coffee cups.

IMG_4174

Got to love those guys

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Naturally this is at Franklin Street

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The View It Doesn’t Suck

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Atop the Metropolitan Museum

38R

Current Living Arrangement

Have a good one!

Strike up the Band We have lived on these Rocks for 3 years!

Wow! Another Year has come to pass and yet here I am still banging away on this laptop. I celebrate this milestone because I haven’t gotten hit by that crosstown bus or fallen ass over teacup down a bilco door. Sadly, I celebrate this 3rd birthday solo while right now Mary Louise is heading on a Ferry to another island down in Mexico with the MoHo’s. No I am not bitter about this one bit. I promise.

In her absence I have been writing this post in my head for a couple of days and I  have to say how humble I am that we are still plugging along in a city that could possibly eat us alive. I have always said that there are two things here in The Empire State that I always run out of; time and money. This year has been a whirlwind and I can’t believe it has been 3 years from when we rolled up to 1300 First Avenue and emptied our contents into the UES. This year there have been some major changes to our lives this year and l have always said that sometimes change is good.

In the past year some of our friends have also followed suit and made moves from familiar Memphis surroundings and dipped their toe into new cities and regions. I always tell them from our experiences that right now there may be tears of uncertainty but each day and week things will normalize and level out. I still look back and say to myself that if you told me 3 years and change that I would be living in New York and love each day of it I would have told you that you are crazy as hell. I am serious when I say that this was the best thing that we have done in our adult lives. The experiences and things that we have and continue to learn about have been amazing. Much like Anthony Bourdain told us on each show was that we need to explore and try out new things. Do the uncomfortable and you will be amazed at to what you learn and it will make you a richer person internally. I still miss that fucker. His story wasn’t finished.

People still ask me how I like living here I always tell them the same response. We love it and should have done this sooner. I am in no way dogging Memphis or our friends back there but Mary Louise and I always had an ‘explorer’ gene in us that was dying to get out. New York is a strange city and has a lot of people from many different walks of life. Much like a child we are always asking questions and seeking information. You know what we found out. They may be from a different country, have a different person that believe in or vote for but we are all children playing in the same sandbox and we better find a way to get along. Call me crazy but the first thing that I ask the yellow cab driver, after I tell them *in my best New York Accent*, is where they are from and “Tell me about yourself.” People love telling their story to strangers. There is a lot of pride in those words and I cherish each and every one.

While I sit here smoking a Perdomo stinking up my work laptop I recall all the things we did. They are in no particular order include;

  • Mary Louise completes and graduates with a MBA from NYU and this better complete her higher education quest. We don’t have any fucking room in closet for a Doctoral Robe and all that crap. (I am very proud of her for this)
  • Mary Louise takes a new job and a whole bunch of new responsibilities that I don’t doubt she will do great in.
  • Made a trip to Philly and got me an authentic Cheesesteak.
  • We moved from the Upper East Side to the Gritty Hipster streets of Downtown Brooklyn. That wasn’t easy folks, oh and moving sucks here in New York City.
  • One would think that downsizing from 1300 square feet to 535 square feet would be easy but try to move to another studio that is configured differently. Thankfully Ba made a trip to Brooklyn and helped us with the move.
  • I made Senior at my work so I am now a Senior Sales Rep for selling tourists tickets on those double decker buses.
  • We made a trip to Maine for Lobster.
  • We made a trip to the Riviera Maya of Mexico for a work counterparts wedding and made a one night trip over to Isla Mujeres in December.
  • Made a trip back home for Christmas and got to see our friends and family.
  • Had to check in on Kitty down in Belize in February and to get warmed up from the 4 Nor’easters we had this past winter.
  • Were honored to become Godparents for Willimena in April and now have another one who will possibly wipe our asses when we get older.
  • Reconnected with Vivian Longstreet and Stone and enjoyed a great weekend with them Upstate.
  • Had to make yet another trip to Mexico and insure that RJ and Mallory didn’t have tres children. (still unknown but we will see in 9 months if that was a success)
  • Mary Louise made a trip to The Hamptons while I smoked meat on Katonah Avenue in the Bronx.
  • Mary Louise currently is down in Mexico right now with the MoHo’s and will return on Monday.

Yep we had a blast on this island and on a couple other islands. Rather than collect stuff we have decided to collect memories and passport stamps. I am nearing 1000 words and will end with a quote that I always love. “Travel is the only thing that you buy that makes you richer”

IMG_2489Much like Black Eyed Peas and Greens on New Years day if you celebrate New Years eve wearing a Bowler hat you will have good luck. *taken 2 blocks from Times Square on NYE

IMG_1883New York Food and Wine Festival Event

IMG_1641Pipes and Drums Prom. Who knew that Mary Louise and Lady Barrister wore the same color dress.

IMG_0059Madison Square Garden Event – here Mary Louise is saying “W.T.C.B.F. Carbunkle Trumpet, LZ goes to all the good shows and you take my ass to a Collegiate Hockey match? You better step up your game and start bogarting the good tickets too!”

IMG_2151Funny I don’t hear her bitching about this one. Aboard the USS Intrepid for the Marine Corp’s Birthday Celebration

IMG_3427Willimena is going to be a handful I can already tell.

IMG_4024 (1)Who has 2 thumbs and completes her MBA from NYU in 2 years while working full time and interviews for a new job. This one! Seriously though. This is it for higher level education.

IMG_2821Right before we move out of the UES they open a bonafide Queso Mexican Restaurant Joint and we find a great Cajun place too! Thank God we have the Q Train!

IMG_3128Boerum Hill is pretty cool. If you walk across the street from our joint you are in Boerum Hill neighborhood. If you make a left and walk across Flatbush you are in Fort Greene. You walk 3 more blocks and you are in Park Slope. Confused yet?

IMG_1262So glad to see Kitty when she made a trip up to the Big Apple.

IMG_0501This is the face of a woman who is about to walk out into a friggin Northeast Nor’easter. 50 MPH Winds with below windchill temps and Snow. I ‘worked from home’ that day!

IMG_8491And here was the first pic when we moved in. 3 years later and we are still here and I may or may not be a liberal democrat.

Thanks for reading and for following this worthless dribble. Now pull that band-aid off and go out and make yourself richer and happy 3rd Anniversary to us!

BoogieDown BBQ at the Rambling House 2018

5 years of the BoogieDown. Between Philly and New York a lot of meat has been cooked and served. This year we changed things up and hosted the event at the Rambling House and did more of a benefit for Alex’s Lemonade. The Memphis Mafia arrived on Thursday and on Friday and Philly rolled into town on Friday night.

On the menu this year was Pulled Pork Shoulder, Baby Back Ribs, Beef Brisket, Smoked Mac and Cheese and Cole Slaw with PorkOsaurus’ new Slaw dressing. We figure that there were about 250 guests and we raised over 2600 for the charity. Thanks to all those who came and a huge thank you to the great staff at The Rambling House.

IMG_3840Why yes we are smoking ribs on Katonah Avenue. What of it?

IMG_3842The PorkOSaurus Company Store. They have a new Slaw Dressing and Marinate

IMG_3863Um Guys, can you get some work done today?

IMG_3845About to start to juice the ribs

IMG_3847Isn’t that a Sexy Picture?

IMG_3846The Chief Bottle Washer and Midget Aficionado

IMG_3856Lemonade Stand courtesy of Fiona

IMG_3864The Boys from the Local showed up for some grub and to let the kids take pictures in the rig

IMG_3865Packed House and they could escape the heat

IMG_3861The Rambling House staff was serving up the food and we also had a face painting person. That is her in the hat….or some homeless girl

IMG_3859This is what probably made the Spring on Pepe’s cooker to go bad.

IMG_3867“Please buy some Rub, Sauce and Marinade so I can have my playroom back!” Poor C-Man was getting tired

IMG_3868Again thank you to the staff at the Rambling House. We couldn’t have done it without you!

You will have to excuse me as I have some non-smoked goods this week.

933 Days and I got it done!

What did I do that took almost 2 and half years to accomplish you ask? I am proud to report that I have the Entire Upper East Side of Manhattan (North of E60th Street to E96th Street,  West of 5th Avenue to the East River) speaking Southern!  It is a thing of beauty, I have everyone saying “hello” and “good morning” on the streets. Snapple and fizzy water has been replaced with freshly brewed Lipton Iced Tea. Bacon Lettuce and Tomato with Pimento Cheese has replaced the Gyro carts on the streets. And Finally the first Friday after Memorial Day everyone will be wearing Seersucker!

I am pretty proud of myself, I didn’t think I could do it. Hell, I even have my work family now issuing “Bless Your Heart” to people instead of saying “F You!”  So what is next for Carbunkle Trumpet you wonder? WE ARE TAKING OUR SHOW IN THE ROAD TO DOWNTOWN BROOKLYN! Yep! We are moving out of the UES and heading to the borough of Brooklyn! Home of Jay Z, Manbuns and Hipsters and I am putting all of you on notice! Ok, so the real reason could be that Momma has taken a new job so we have to move out of her employers housing but we are excited for the new adventure.

We looked at a number of different locations on this rock and other rocks and decided that we needed the following things;

  • One or two subway stops back into Manhattan and easily walkable
  • Multiple Subway Lines for when there are delays, cancelations or weekend repairs
  • Full Service Building so they can accept our Vodka & Wine fruit & vegetable deliveries
  • Office or business center shared space in common area
  • Outdoor space and maybe an outdoor grill for daddy to burn red meat
  • Had to be cool and have a neighborhood tavern (or two)

Downtown Brooklyn checked all the boxes so we started to find a new home in that area. We looked into one building but they would only allow one dog and since we have two that collectively weigh 11 pounds that was out. We found another joint that is just as good and pending the vetting process we are in. We are shooting for next week to move so don’t be surprised if this sucker is quiet next week.

data=2M2OiB_yxfn5DcdjDRgvI6wr69jNRy3suS-zfNpCNuuMB_IbWMxsjfy6d2reA7Kcv5tiy7Pqdj1XX4k_InfgQqIgpJBUQt63NdtgsnjRhj--JFktXUBjgvOMCIXHj8hTyuyOWe are smack dab in the middle of everything. Walking distance to the Barclays Center, right next to a University that we may know the head men’s basketball coach, it is a quick Subway ride to the Murphranks and there is an IHop on the Fulton Mall!

IMG_3004Roughly 13 subway lines I can jump on to get into the city!

imagesHere is the front of our Non-Hipster Building

Dattner-Architects_HubOasisAll186_web-1-840x580I mean this isn’t too bad for those 30 nice days of summer for us to enjoy!

IMG_3011Maya is saying “Wait, I like the UES! People tell me that I look cute and want to pet me! I don’t even like the Beastie Boys”

IMG_3012Maddy is looking forward to taking a wiz on the artificial grass in the dog run that they have. Yep she will peeing on Brady Bunch Astroturf!

IMG_3070This part sucks, basically because we don’t have much room to put shit

IMG_3069Office and Holiday Crap is in boxes!

IMG_3068You will notice that the Cigar Humidor and the Steve Bartman Bobble Head are still here. I will pack those last of course!

IMG_3067Blue Dogs are packed and ready to move to Brooklyn

IMG_3065Not to say that we don’t have a lot to offer but do any of your future residents make Logo Cornbread? Please accept us and can you make it quick, we are starting to get nervous!

We will keep you posted, till then I will be busy growing out my hair for the Man bun!

 

Monday Lunch Club Philly

Fade In – Fancy Bougie Gift Shop in a downtown Philadelphia Hotel

A somewhat haggard looking customer places on the counter 2 Gatorades, a liter of water and diet coke. He scans the back counter where the Over the Counter medicines are located.

Customer – “May I get 2 packages of Advil and some Imodium AD please?”
Cashier – “That will be $39.75 will you be paying cash or credit?”
Customer – “Credit and I don’t need a receipt.”
Cashier – “Sir, I hope that you get over your ‘Flu’.”

Way back when the Monday Lunch Club was in full force each Monday at lunch we would convene at Heavenly Hoagie on Union Avenue to recap the weekend, brainstorm new business ideas, and bust chops with Pete the owner. We were convinced that Pete was either in the witness protection bureau or the personal bookie for The Mob. I mean no disrespect to Pete but the man couldn’t remember shit or a food order to save his life. I mean I ordered the same thing week after week and he never got it right.

Pete’s specialty sandwich was a Philly Cheesesteak since he was from South Philly. Prior to when we moved up here I had never visited Philadelphia nor had an “authentic Philly Cheesesteak wit wiz.” The bread, the steak, the onions, the cheese wiz, it was a good thing and it kicked the ever-loving shit out of Lenny’s sandwich or other deli’s that have a Philly on the menu.

This past weekend we were in Philly for Pepe and D3’s child’s birthday. On Sunday we awoke in the hotel and were needing grease, cheese and bread and cheese fries. I confirmed with Google that we were close to Geno’s and Pat’s but on the list was Steve’s Prince of Steaks. We decided that this was going to be our choice as it was the closest to our hotel.

I opted for the double meat – double cheese and went with “wit wiz” and it didn’t disappoint at all. I knew that this place was going to be a good one because anyone who has Cheese Fries has to be good. Hey I just got back good results from my blood work last week so I figured that I could ‘go off plan’ a tad.

The Cheesesteak and fries didn’t disappoint. It was spot on!

IMG_3051The Center City Location

IMG_3054The Menu was pretty much like Pete had minus the Fries. I always wondered why Pete would sometimes put Marinara Sauce on my hoagie. It was “Pizza Sauce”

IMG_3053Where the Magic Happens

IMG_3024_LIWhen you get >45 you appreciate getting good results like this

IMG_3055I didn’t know if I should salute or eat it!

IMG_3056It would be considered rude to show an empty wrapper so I am going to post this one halfway through.

IMG_3058The Neighbor is probably drooling on her iFoam right now

No Disrespect to Pete, Geno or Pat but Steve’s Prince of Steaks is on point! And it helped my bad case of MPH.

“Take me out to the ball game, take me out to the crowd….”

Buy me some Peanuts and Cracker Jacks who the Feck am I kidding buy me some friggin long underwear and call my ass in May for tickets opening weekend in the North sucks! Yep yours truly attended a baseball game north of 160th street during opening weekend and it was cold to say the least.  The tourist bus company that I work for has 4 seats in Yankees stadium for all 81 home baseball games. I have to share the hosting of the tickets with the other ticket sales reps and naturally because I am low man on the totem pole I don’t get first dibs. On Thursday the word came down that there were some seats open for Sunday’s game because LJZ was nice enough to take a day off from her residency at Yankees stadium so I raised my hand.

What I should have done first is look at the friggin weather report. Ah, it was at least sunny and not raining but albeit it was kind of chilly. The game was fun, the Yankees went up 5-0 in the first and we were spitting distance from Aaron Judge and of course….beer so it was a good day. The clients enjoyed themselves and after some extra innings at the Yankee Tavern we headed home for the evening.

IMG_2934Puffy Coats being worn in a baseball game. Friggin Puffy Coats!

IMG_2935“Not my seat or my beer” No Man Ever

IMG_2938That boy is a grown ass man! I can’t wait for the Cubs to play them in the World Series this year! It is going to be fun!

Have a good day and go support your local baseball team. It is supposed to mean that spring and summer is here.